“Consider this me approaching you at a table with other guys.” Danny’s standing right beside me, so close that as I turn to meet his blue eyes, I can smell the sweetness of his cologne.

“Now what?”

His question brings a wave of chlorine and fresh air to wash over me as I hear Max’s voice echo the same question to me last summer. My back and thighs tingle with the memory of the blades of grass scratching my exposed skin and recall my hands yearning to reach out and touch him.

My thoughts stop as I feel a foreign touch brush against my finger and look down to see Danny trace along my tattoo that reads, his. “Bad break up,” Danny states quietly.

Max’s face slowly dissipates like a fog as Danny’s eyes search mine.

“It’s been a long year,” I repeat, now that he can hear me with the crowd being a few decibels quieter.

“Okay, I’ll play my cards,” Danny says, inching toward me as someone works to get between tables. “I want to get to know you. We’ll start as friends, no pressure. And when you’re ready to admit that you like me…” his smile turns cocky, making me laugh and shake my head “…we’ll take that step.”

“You don’t know me to like me.”

“I know that you have four sisters, so you either have the patience of a saint or have some serious fight in you. I know that Maxwell adores you, which speaks volumes because he doesn’t like anyone.” The exaggerated assessment of Fitz makes me laugh again. “And I’m very attracted to you.”

“You know, there are a lot of girls here that would be a lot less complicated.”

“I haven’t noticed anyone since you walked in.”

My eyes are stuck between wanting to roll at his remark and widening at his sincerity when my chair rocks.

“Okay, I ordered. Busty blonde seems on it. She really wants another chance with you.” Fitz sings the last few words as he settles in his seat, placing a hand on my shoulder to silently apologize for running into my chair, seemingly unfazed by Danny’s close proximity to me.

“Your turn to save me,” Danny says, grinning.

I look up to see the blonde waitress approaching with a look of determination.

“Wait until the food comes. I don’t want her spitting in it,” Fitz hisses, nodding to Danny’s empty chair.

Danny laughs and turns to return to his seat. As she arrives, her face gives way to her relief as she wedges herself between Danny and Fitz, so that I can barely see her. “Hey, Danny! Your order is in. I just wanted to see if there was anything else that you guys need?”

Danny quickly glances over to Fitz and me, and I try to discreetly gesture to Fitz’s water glass. He turns back to the waitress and smiles but leans back on his stool.

“Could we get some more water?”

The crowd drowns out her reply as they yell and cheer in unison, but I catch the hint of her smile before she turns and wades through the crowds. Fitz leans forward and says something to Danny that I’m not able to make out over the residual noise, and my eyes scan over the back of the bar where a group of men are acting like cajoling monkeys.

As the noise begins to recede to a loud hum that allows me to make out the sounds of Fitz’s and Danny’s voices, a curtain of screams and squeals erupt. I turn in my seat to see several women shoving through the tables, followed by a chorus of objections from the patrons.

“Shit,” Danny groans. I look over to see his eyes scan over the bar.

“Alright, H, help him out,” Fitz says, tipping his water glass back to empty it in one gulp as though it’s something stronger.

“What am I missing?”

“Harper, please don’t slap me. We’re only friends. I know that, and I’m sorry to use you.” The words flow quickly from Danny’s mouth as he rounds the table.

“Danny, I love you!” The screaming declaration breaks my attention for a moment as I look up to realize the intention of these women.

Danny’s hands slide along my jaw on either side, and before I can stop it, or question if I want to stop it, he kisses me.

The bar erupts in catcalls and whistles as Danny’s arm slinks to my back, and he dips me slightly as his lips move over mine for several moments.

“Thanks,” Danny whispers in my ear as he rights me. His hand brushes along my hair, tucking it behind one ear, as he somehow seems to manage to smile even broader.

Danny moves his stool beside mine as we watch a few men and some officers that have appeared to escort the women out of the bar. Thoughts and emotions work to break through the tiled façade I’ve buried them under. I keep them at bay by finishing my beer as our food arrives with a man that apologizes for the inconvenience, offering us more drinks that we decline.

When we finally stand up to leave, Danny accompanies us. It takes an exorbitant amount of time for us to cross the small bar with people approaching Danny, pleading for autographs and pictures.

“Alright, handsome, I think much more and you’re going to lose your friends.” A large, bald black man appears, his voice deep and husky as he creates a human barrier between Danny and another group of fans.

Danny places a hand on the small of my back that had I not seen in the reflection of the window we just passed, I wouldn’t have known was there due to my many layers. The cold air hits me like a wall as it usually does here, causing my muscles to constrict painfully.

“What are you guys doing Saturday?” Danny asks, undeterred by the freezing temperatures.

“I’ll text you her number, but her California blood is too thin for this weather,” Fitz says, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.

“Okay, where’s your phone, friend?” Danny asks, taking a step closer to us.

My muscles protest as I move my arm from around my middle to retrieve my phone from my purse.

Danny takes it from my grasp with a smile. His fingers move quickly over the screen before retrieving his own phone and looking at it with a satisfied expression, then hands me back my own phone.

“Don’t trust me?” Fitz teases.

“Some things you can’t leave in the hands of others,” Danny replies, wrapping an arm around Fitz. He pulls back with a laugh and then engulfs me in his arms.

“I’ll see you Saturday.”

“I didn’t say yes.”

“You will.” He winks, squeezing my hand for a brief second. Then he slowly releases my fingers, allowing the cold to assault my skin with vengeance against the warmth he left behind. I hear him laugh as he follows the large black man that’s clearly giving him a hard time down the road.

“Best. Friend. Ever.” Fitz tugs me closer, and we walk with me under his arm to the car. “I should wear a badge. No, no, a medal!” he cries, patting a spot on his chest as we make it back to his car. “I bet you can find one online.”

When I get home, the silence swallows me. The threat of impending thoughts has me deliberately drawing out the process of getting ready for bed in an attempt to avoid them. I watch several episodes of a sitcom that I manage to laugh at a few times with only slight force as my mind quietly buzzes.

Eventually, I turn it off and let out a deep breath as I close my eyes and lie back. The night begins unraveling, one thread at a time. The kiss had been so sudden and such a surprise it hadn’t fully registered until just now. I press my fingers to my lips at the memory of feeling Danny’s, soft and warm, against mine, his chin slightly rough. My eyes fill with tears, and I get up and go back to the bathroom and begin brushing my teeth, though I had just moments ago. I scrub until my gums burn and my eyes release a new stream of tears.

I lie in bed again, feeling like my chest has been stuffed with cotton. I can’t breathe. I can hear the condescending tone of my heart as images fly through my mind—images of Max smiling and laughing, looking at me with adoration and love. I can feel his skin warm against me, taste his lips as they touch mine. My breath hitches as a sharp, gut-wrenching ache forces me to curl into myself and grasp my chest to make sure I haven’t somehow been physically ripped open.