“Wear it over your heart,” Owen said. “And read the inscription on the back while you’re at it.”

“Your angel,” Shade read haltingly. “…is always.” He scowled at the words.

“Close to your heart,” Owen finished for him, knowing how the guy struggled with written language.

Shade bit his lip. “I wonder if she’s awake yet. I need to call her. Do we have phone service yet?” He slipped the chain over his head and patted it into his chest, before peeling the panties off of his forehead and seeking clothes to make himself decent before he talked to his three-year old daughter on Christmas morning.

“Yeah, we have service,” Tex yelled from the back of the bus. “I just called the crew. The equipment truck didn’t attempt the pass, so they’re all fine. A snow plow is trying to clear the roads and they’re sending up a tow truck to help stranded vehicles.”

Not quite a Christmas miracle, but definitely good news.

Owen found Kelly in the driver’s seat. He was wide awake, wrapped in a red plaid flannel blanket staring out at the bleak white landscape outside the bus. The snow had stopped during the night, but the wind had piled it into huge drifts. The sky was gray with dense clouds making the sunlight dim. Like Kelly’s mood. Owen couldn’t stand to see him depressed. Especially on Christmas. He stood beside his chair and stared at Kelly’s reflection in the windshield for a long moment. Kelly had that familiar far-off pained look in his eyes. He didn’t seem to realize that Owen was standing at his side.

“You’re thinking about her again,” Owen said.

Kelly sucked a startled breath through his nose and then released it slowly. “Christmas is tough,” he said quietly, though his gaze never moved from whatever point in the distance held his attention. He was seeing the past. Still living in the past.

“Why’s that?” Owen asked.

“She said she wanted me to take her to see the Christmas tree in Times Square before she died.”

Owen knew Sara had died in January, so the opportunity had been there. “Did you go?”

He shook his head almost unperceptively. “I refused to take her. I wanted her to stay in bed. All those little things she wanted to do before she went, I wouldn’t let her do them. I was so afraid of her dying that I didn’t let her live.”

“Are you going to let yourself start living soon?” Owen asked.

Kelly turned his head to look up at him. “You can’t help but stick your nose in other people’s business, can you?”

“Nope.”

“And you can’t let people wallow in their misery.”

“Nope.”

“You know why?”

“Nope.”

“Nothing truly horrible has ever happened to you.”

Owen smiled. “And I plan to keep it that way.” He pulled the last gift from his bag and tossed it on Kelly’s lap. “Santa got you something. When you wear it, Sara will know you’re still bound to her. When you take it off, it’s because you’re finally ready to do what she wanted you to do and move on.”

Owen hoped Kelly didn’t wear the leather wrist cuff for too awfully long. He wanted it to be a constant reminder to him that Sara would want him to find someone to love. Or at least to someone to screw properly.

He patted Kelly’s shoulder and turned to go. Kelly grabbed Owen’s wrist and stuffed a small box in his hand. “Santa got you something too.”

Excitement flowing through him, Owen opened the box and found a set of dog tags on a chain. He ran his fingers over his brother’s name—Chad—and then donned him. He’d worn dog tags for years—even before his brother had joined the military—to symbolize how he loved his country. These tags meant something even more to him. He clutched the flat pieces of metal in one hand and sent a silent prayer to keep his brother safe in Afghanistan. He hoped Chad was able to have some sort of celebration. Maybe he could talk the guys into visiting the troops and putting on a concert for them someday. Or maybe he could fool Shade into thinking that he’d come up with the idea and he’d insist the band go overseas.

“Thanks,” Owen said, “but don’t you think it’s kind of lame to give your buddy jewelry for Christmas?” He knew damned well he’d given three out of four of his band mates some sort of jewelry, but couldn’t help but mess with Kellen. He was entirely too gloomy this morning.

“That’s from Santa,” Kelly said. “Don’t tell me you stopped believing.”

“Of course I haven’t. It’s Christmas.”

He turned to find Shade talking on his cell phone and grinning like a loon. “Did you open all your presents already?” Shade laughed at whatever his daughter said on the other end of the line. “What did Santa a bring you?” He interjected a “wow!” and a “that’s awesome!” every now and then, but otherwise just listened to her rattle on about her apparently huge pile of gifts. After several minutes, his smile faltered. “No, angel, I can’t come see you today.” He put on a pair of horribly bent sunglass to hide his suddenly watery eyes, but he couldn’t disguise the breathless quality of his voice as he spoke to her. “I’m stuck in the snow.” He chuckled. “Yes, I know it doesn’t snow lots in Texas, but I’m in Idaho. It snows lots in Idaho.” He bit his lip. “You’d make a perfect snow angel.”

Owen pointed at his Santa hat to remind him that they were going to give little Julie a second Christmas this year.

“When daddy gets home…” He paused as she interrupted him again. “Eight more sleeps. I know that’s a long time, honey. When daddy gets home in eight more sleeps, we’ll have another Christmas with just you and me.”

Owen crossed his arms over his chest and cleared his throat pointedly. He totally wanted in on the fun. He loved Christmas just as much as any three-year-old did.

“And Owen is going to get himself stuck in the chimney just for you.” Shade laughed. “Yep, he does have a flying reindeer as a matter of fact.” And then apparently his ex-wife got on the phone because his expression changed from his “melted daddy” look to his “oh my god what does this bitch want now” look. “Maybe he does have a fucking flying reindeer,” Shade shouted.

Really? She was going to yell at him about that? Owen normally didn’t interfere in Shade’s drama with his ex-wife, but he wasn’t letting Tina ruin Shade’s entire day. He was miserable enough about not getting to see his daughter today.

He lifted the phone to his ear, not really paying attention to her caterwauling. “Tina,” Owen said, “he’ll be there to pick Julie up a week from tomorrow. Have a Merry Christmas.”

He hung up and handed the phone back to Shade.

“Thanks,” Shade said, “I can’t seem to control my temper when I have to interact with her.”

“No problem,” Owen said. “I love hanging up on her.”

“How about a nice Christmas breakfast?” Shade said.

“Are you cooking?” Owen asked.

“Yep.”

“Pancakes?”

“What else?”

“I’m in.”

“Me too,” Gabe said, setting his new book aside.

“Me three,” Adam said.

“Kelly?” Owen called. “You want breakfast?”

“Does Gabe have pants on yet?”

“I’m on it,” Gabe promised.

“Then yeah.” Kelly shed his blanket, his new leather cuff on his wrist.

It brought Owen no joy to see Kellen wearing the gift he’d given him. He looked forward to the day that he took it off permanently.

Lindsey and Vanessa slinked out of the bedroom at the back of the bus.

“Can we join you?” Vanessa asked.

“Shade tugged a pair of panties out of his pocket and passed them discretely to Owen.

“Did you ever find your panties, Vanessa?” Shade asked.

“No,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest. “I think some fool stole them.”

Owen tucked her panties into his back pocket.”

“I hope they turn up,” Shade said. “We have a no panties-no breakfast policy on this tour bus.”

“Whatever,” Vanessa said.

“It’s true,” Gabe said. “Why do you think I decided to get dressed?”


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