My wish didn’t come true.

So the distraction of my birthday was a diversion I gladly welcomed.

The girls planned such a nice birthday lunch for me, and I loved them for it. However, tonight has been what I have been most looking forward to. Lakin has been extremely persistent about spending time together, and I haven’t been strong enough to ward him off. The exact opposite, in fact. I find myself looking forward to our time together, even if it’s just as friends. I’ve kept my blossoming friendship with Lakin a secret, and I would love to share our relationship with the girls, but I know better. It would upset Brooks, it could make things awkward with Vivian, and it could strain those friendships. So for now, he stays a secret. Now more than ever, I need that friendship.

I wasn’t surprised when he demanded we spend time together on my birthday. I cleared my evening and he commandeered the available time.

When Lakin told me what we were doing tonight, I admit I was more than excited about it. I’ve only been bowling once in my life, the girls took me back in college, and I was worse than terrible. Thank goodness for the bumper pads that kept my granny-throws in the lane.

As horrible as I was, I had so much fun. I love getting to do things I didn’t get to as a kid. I never willingly let myself wallow in the fact I missed out. A childhood with sleepovers, birthday parties, and trips to the zoo isn’t what I had. So now, as an adult, it always feels extra good to make up for those things.

As I pull into the parking lot of the bowling alley, I park in the open space next to Lakin. He sees me, steps out of the car, and hustles to my spot to open my car door. My brain becomes mush and I have trouble concentrating for a moment. Lakin is a very attractive man, young, but attractive. I’ve managed to box him into a certain category, one with suits and business transactions. Tonight, when he stepped out of his car, he kicked through the square I pegged him into and now he stands before me, a man after my own heart.

Faded jeans hang on his hips, paired with a vintage t-shirt, which looks like it might have actually been at Woodstock, and a pair of black Converse. He reaches out his hand to help me out of the car and smiles when he notices my own purple Chuck Taylors.

“Cool shoes,” I slyly say as I take his hand. His strong grip feels nice wrapped around my fingers. I fight the urge to thread our fingers together and enjoy the idea of us as a couple.

“Shoes?” he asks dumbfounded. “I thought it would be the shirt that won you over. It took forever to find this Led Zeppelin shirt. I dressed up for your birthday.” He squeezes my hand and closes the door behind me.

“Don’t worry, I’m impressed by the shirt, too. You did well, Lakin,” I tell him, lightly pulling my hand away from his. I feel the loss instantly and regret the decision. Without skipping a beat, he places his hand at the small of my back and leads me into the bowling alley. It feels very couple-like, even though we are not a couple. If Brooks ever found out we were even hanging out as much as we do, he would be livid with Lakin. Since that first semester at college, Brooks has always been that older brother figure to me and he would expect the same treatment from Lakin. For us to venture into the realm of dating, would throw that relationship off kilter, and Brooks wouldn’t stand for it. For the sake of keeping the peace, I keep Lakin at a friendly, but appropriate, distance.

As soon as we pass through the entrance, I take a deep breath and let the stale beer and dirty shoes smell that’s wafting through the breeze from the ball return fans infiltrate my nose. I find it weird how bowling alleys have a specific odor to them. Jen would be throwing a fit at being subjected to such an aroma, but it brings a smile to my face. It’s the smell of people who are here to let off steam; it’s the smell of families who are out for a G-rated night on the town. Tonight is no different. Laughter occasionally interrupted by the sound of pins being knocked down, echoes through the place.

We gather our rented shoes, bowling balls, nachos, and sodas before finding our open lane.

“What are you staring at?” Lakin asks, noticing how I’ve centered my attention on the family one lane over. The children next to us squeal excitedly every time a pin falls. The parents provide high fives and hugs to each child as they return from their bowling attempt. I can’t pull my eyes away from the scene before me.

It’s pure bliss. It’s a family. Something I can’t remember ever being a part of, nor do I foresee ever having.

“I’m just glad we came here tonight,” I tell him as I finish lacing my red and brown leather bowling shoes. “Thank you for inviting me.”

“I can think of a million and a half ways you can repay me,” he says suggestively, wiggling his eyebrows and scooting closer to me on the bench.

“Oh my word. You’re terrible,” I chuckle, pushing him away from me. “Go bowl. You obviously have some pent up tension you need to let out.” He lets out a bellowing laugh and stands to retrieve his bowling ball.

“I guarantee bowling isn’t going to help with that.”

I pick up the nachos and shovel a chip into my mouth. “Well, if you keep it up, we won’t have to worry about anyone finding out about us hanging out. Brooks will let Jen neuter you, and then you can join us as one of the girls during our coffee get-togethers.”

He brings his hand up in surrender and laughs. “Mercy. I give up; even I know well enough to stay clear of Jen.”

Turning away from me, he slides his fingers into his bowling ball and hauls it up into position just in front of his face to line up his roll. Taking three long strides, he swings his arm back, and just as he slings it forward again to release it down the alley, I announce, “Then again, sex usually fixes most things.”

Startled, Lakin’s forward momentum stalls and he drops the bowling ball. It loudly crashes onto the pine floor and rolls into the gutter. It doesn’t even make it halfway down the lane before the ball stops completely. He spins around to look at me, and his stunned expression quickly morphs into a scowl.

I burst out laughing. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help it,” I croak out between giggles.

“That’s not even fair. Mocking my weakness, have you no shame?” He plops down next to me and swipes the nachos from my hand. “You’ve lost your right to the nachos,” he pouts.

“Oh come on now. I’m only kidding. That was funny, you have to admit.” I try to cushion his souring mood and finally a small smile breaks through.

“I don’t think you should ever joke about having sex with me, Cam. It’s an experience that will certainly leave you with a smile, but no one will be laughing.” He glides his hand across my cheek and pulls me closer to him. I can feel his breath against my neck provoking a shiver that wakes all of my senses. I feel my breath catch and I’m waiting for his next words to rescue me.

“It’s your turn to bowl,” he murmurs. He then pulls away and pops a sloppy chip into his mouth, a wicked grin plastered across his face.

My stalled breathing pattern is now in overdrive and I feel like I may hyperventilate. I’m not sure if I’m turned on or angry. It’s entirely possible that I’m slightly both. My mind swirls as to what to say, how I should respond to recover.

“Sir? I brought your ball back,” the child from the nearby lane interrupts, handing Lakin the ball. He’s young, maybe six or seven, and I’m shocked he can even carry the bowling ball. “Don’t worry, mister, I couldn’t keep it in the lane when I first started either. I don’t think I was that bad, but just keep practicing and you’ll hit a pin.”

I get control of my breathing, thankful for this little guy’s interruption.

“Thanks, buddy, I’ll keep trying,” Lakin says, grasping onto the ball and shooting me an evil look. I cover my mouth to stifle the giggle that is attempting to break free.