He steps back slowly, staring at me the whole time. “Is that what you really want?” His jaw ticks while he waits for my answer. Every fiber in my being is screaming at me to say no, that’s not what I want.

Instead, I say, “Yes.” He walks away without so much as a backward glance.

I STAYED LOCKED away in my bedroom the rest of last night and all day today, only coming out when absolutely necessary. The amount of self loathing is indescribable. I’ve managed to push away the one good thing to happen to me in my life. The desperation to take it back is all consuming and I’ve had to fight the urge to run downstairs and tell him I didn’t mean it. Really, I didn’t, but I knew it was the only thing I could do. I can’t be tempted by Alex and the possibilities he represents. The biggest one being happiness—or better yet, love—which I sacrifice.

All too soon, it’s five o’clock. I’m sitting in the bedroom watching television when I hear Cal talking downstairs. I have to get rid of this foul mood now or Cal will know something is up. And there is no way I want him catching wind of my internal struggle and the reasons behind it.

“Hi, Cal,” I say once I get downstairs and find him sitting in the breakfast nook. “Everything work out yesterday?” Leaning down, I give him a small kiss before smiling warmly at him.

“Yes, it’s all sorted for now.”

“That’s great. Would you like me to start dinner? Are you hungry?” I focus all of my energy into being the wife I was before Alex was brought into my life. I’m attentive and considerate to Cal, making sure all of his needs are met and every detail looked after.

“Yes,” he responds curtly. It seems he’s still upset with our phone conversation last night. He’s not making this easy as the disdain I have for him slowly creeps its way up my spine. I fight it back, desperate to maintain the façade that I have gotten so good at portraying.

Cal sighs. “I forgot something in the car.” He gets up and heads for the garage to retrieve whatever it is he’s missing. As he’s leaving the kitchen, Alex walks in. I immediately divert my attention, not wanting to encourage him to speak to me. Cal’s phone lights up and rings once beside me. He must be really distracted lately; it’s very unlike him to leave his phone lying around, and he’s done it twice now. I look at it, and the image displayed on the screen makes me nauseous. I snatch the phone up and swipe at the screen to unlock it so I can see what the hell this is all about.

It’s a text from Mona. She’s sent a picture of herself lying down, spread eagle, naked from the waist down. The image of her vagina staring straight at me.

My pussy already misses you. I can’t wait for you to fill me with your thick cock again.

I’m going to be sick. Dropping the phone on the table, I run to the bathroom before I empty the contents of my stomach. I’m not innocent and I haven’t been the perfect wife, especially with my recent activities with Alex. But to have it in my face—literally—like that is more than I can take. My arms drape over the toilet seat as I rest my head on my arms. God, I’m such a fucking idiot! How in the world did I ever think I’d be enough for a man like Cal?

My mother was wrong. I did everything she told me growing up. I stayed thin, I made myself available sexually, I took interest in their hobbies, I smiled and was supportive even when I hated something, and I always, always hid my unhappiness and disdain for the man I was with.

It didn’t fucking work.

There’s a soft knock on the door, and I know who it is. Cal couldn’t give two shits about me, so he wouldn’t care if I was barfing up my intestines, and I just don’t have the strength to fight off Alex.

“Go away!” I shout, not caring who hears or how it sounds. Normally, I would worry that Cal would hear the distraught in my voice, but right now I. Don’t. Care. I’m met with silence and am so grateful that he didn’t push and is letting me be. After a few minutes, I make a decision. I’m confronting Cal about this. Repercussions be damned, I will not have him blatantly and publically disrespect me like this.

Barging out of the restroom, I set my sights on Cal and charge his way. I’m on a mission. “You missed a text message,” I say accusatorily.

Looking down at his phone, he says, “Okay.”

“Why don’t you check it, Cal?” My arms cross over my chest in defiance. His eyebrow arches in warning, telling me to back off, but I don’t. “I already saw it. Do you want to tell me what that is?”

“Well,” he starts, sitting back in his chair and crossing his arms to match my stance. “It looks like Mona’s pussy to me.” Picking up his phone, he examines it again. “Mmm, yes, that’s definitely Mona’s pussy.” My mouth falls open at his lack of remorse. I really thought he would try to hide it at the very least. My veins are filled with molten lava as my blood boils at his audacity. I am not this woman. I’m not the wife that turns a blind eye to her lying, cheating husband while he demands everything from her.

“How long, Cal? Is this a recent thing? Something you’ve been doing while you’ve been voting?”

Cal stands up and walks casually to me. His calm demeanor is a little eerie. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’ve been fucking her for months now. You’re a bore in the sack and I needed something a little more exciting. Mona does that for me. What goes on between Mona and I is of little consequence to you. This doesn’t change anything for us.” He lets out a small laugh. “Except now there’s no need for all the horrible fake orgasms.” My cheeks instantly flush at the mention of all the times I’ve faked it during intimacy and thought that he had no clue. My embarrassment quickly gets pushed aside as my anger over the situation takes over.

“This changes everything!” I shout, the vein in my neck popping out. My hands are balled up at my sides while I lean forward to yell at him.

“No, it doesn’t. You’re still going to accompany me to all campaign functions, interviews, et cetera. And you’re going to do it lovingly just like you’ve always done. You will show support, devotion, and loyalty, but now there will be no secrets. You see, I’m not the only one that’s been lying. Am I, Elizabeth? How stupid do you think I am? Do you honestly think I’ve been buying your pathetic act? That I really believed you love me? I know why you stay with me, and that’s fine.” My heart drops as realization hits. I’ve been miserable, pretending to be something I’m not for nothing. All this time he saw right through it, but he knew I’d never leave. “Now, neither one of us has to pretend in private. You’ll know when I’m out late that I’m fucking Mona, and when I come home we’ll be happily married again. Oh, and just so you know, the hate you feel for me is mutual. So the next time I shove my dick in your mouth—which, by the way, you will accept without complaint—just know it’s not you that’s getting me hard, it’s this picture of Mona’s pussy,” he says as he holds up his cell phone.

I’m beyond mad right now. My vision blurs with the rage boiling beneath the surface. I’m mad at Cal for thinking this kind of arrangement would work, but I’m more upset with myself for always catering to him. In a way, it’s probably my fault he thinks he could get away with something so absurd. I never balk or question anything he tells me, so why would I now? Then again, he obviously knows that I’d put up with just about anything because of my obligations. Things have changed—I’m changing, and I refuse to play this charade with him any longer. “So, tell me, Cal. How does this work? You fuck her and then come home to shove your dick in my mouth? Is that how it’ll work?” I ask sarcastically, but the image of him all but forcing me to give him head runs through my mind. My stomach violently rolls at the thought that he was with her before he made me suck him off.