“Awesome! Thanks, Garrett. Yeah, I, um…I’ve been looking for Ari. I’ll give her a few minutes, and if she doesn’t show up, I’ll head on up.”

Garrett said something else to Jeff that I couldn’t make out. I closed my eyes and began to plot my revenge on Gunner.

“What in the fuck?” Jeff said.

I looked up at him. I was itching everywhere, and I had horse shit all over my shirt. My warm and happy just-fucked feeling was gone, completely and utterly gone.

“Yep. I was trying to get dressed, and this little fucker here pushed me into his own shit! My warm and happy just-fucked feeling is gone!” I yelled out.

Big Roy started bouncing his head up and down again.

I jumped up and said, “Look! He’s laughing at me. I swear to you, he did it on purpose.”

Jeff looked toward Big Roy, then down at the shit, and then back up at me. He busted out laughing. I just stood there with my mouth hanging open, wearing a shit-covered shirt and red polka-dot panties, while my own husband laughed at me.

“You think it’s funny?” I asked.

He started to nod. I reached down and picked up my shoes. Jeff opened the stall door, still laughing his ass off.

“I’m sorry, baby, but I can’t let you near the kids with horse shit all over you!” Jeff said as he placed his hands on his knees and continued to laugh.

Uh-huh, I see how this is going to be. “Is that a fact? You think this is pretty funny, huh?”

“Holy shit, Ari! Oh man,” Jeff said as he wiped away the tears.

Tears! He is laughing so hard that he has tears.

I slowly smiled and started laughing.

“See! You can’t help but laugh, too,” Jeff said.

I quickly walked up to him and slammed my body against his. I wrapped my arms around him and held on for dear life.

“What in the hell, Ari? Get off of me!”

Jeff tried like hell to get me off of him, but I was holding on like my life depended on it. We ended up losing our balance, and we fell to ground where I crawled on top of him and pushed his hands down and over his head. He slowly smiled as I felt his erection up against me.

He said, “He’s ready again.”

I couldn’t help but smile back as I rubbed myself against him. Oh god…I could totally—

“Ari…what in the hell are you doing?”

I snapped my head up and saw my father standing there with his hands on his hips, looking rather pissed.

Jeff pushed me off of him. He jumped up and took about three steps away from me.

Pussy.

“Dad, um…I was…well, we were…”

I looked at Jeff, who was clearly not going to offer to help me out with an explanation. It was then that I realized I was standing in my panties. Shit! Shit! Shit! I quickly pulled on my jeans and slipped my sneakers back on.

The whole time, my dad was giving the dirtiest looks to Jeff. I couldn’t help but giggle.

“Jeff and I came down to see the horses, and I…I, um…”

My dad walked closer and stopped right in front of me. “Is that…horse shit on you?” He looked over at Jeff. “And why in the hell is it on you, too? What in the world were you two doing?” He instantly stopped talking.

He closed his eyes and let out a breath as he shook his head. “Okay, I understand you’re married with two kids now…but really? Sex in the barn…at your niece’s first birthday party?” He turned and looked at Jeff. “What in the hell is wrong with you, Johnson?”

Jeff’s mouth dropped open, and that was when I knew I was in trouble.

Don’t talk. Just don’t talk, Jeff.

“What? Why do you always assume it’s my fault?” Jeff asked.

I stepped in between Jeff and my father. “It’s okay, Jeff. Let’s just head on back up—”

My dad gently pushed me out of the way as he pointed his finger at Jeff. “Because, nine times out of ten, it is your fault.”

“Oh…oh, real nice. Well, it just so happens that it wasn’t my fault this time,” Jeff said.

I tried desperately to get him to stop talking. “Jeff, it’s okay, really. I’m sure Ells and Gunner can give us a change of clothes, and—”

“Why do you both have horse shit on you? And why was my daughter sitting on top of you, half-naked, you ass?”

Oh shit. Jeff has that look.

“First off, it was your daughter who propositioned me for sex in the first place.”

My mouth dropped open, and I couldn’t move. He did not just say that!

“Being the good husband that I am, I wasn’t about to let her down, so I brought her to the barn.”

Stop. Talking.

“We heard Garrett, and Ari was half-naked, so I pushed her into Big Roy’s stall before Garrett walked in. Roy was obviously in a playful mood, and he nudged Ari. She…well, she…she lost her balance and went into the…”

He’s gonna start laughing! Oh my god. He’s actually going to start laughing again.

Even though he tried to contain it, Jeff let out a small laugh. I didn’t know what to be more pissed about—the fact that he’d just told my father we’d fucked in the barn or that he was laughing because I had fallen in horse shit.

My dad stood there for a second, just staring at Jeff. “Jeff…son…there are some things you just don’t tell the father of your wife. You’ll start to understand this more when Grace grows up, but in the meantime, from now on…let’s just keep you and my daughter’s sexual encounters to yourself, shall we?”

My father turned and walked away. I put my hands on hips and gave Jeff a what-the-fuck look. I shook my head as he shrugged his shoulders.

“What? The man scares me. He’s threatened my life before, so excuse me for panicking. I felt the best thing to do was to come clean, but…” Jeff took a deep breath and quickly let it out. “But I see I was wrong.”

“Ya think? Dickwad.”

I started making my way out of the barn and up toward the house. I walked up to Ellie, who was standing on the porch.

She just looked at me. “What happened?”

“Trust me, you don’t want to know. Have y’all sung ‘Happy Birthday’ yet?”

Ellie smiled and shook her head. “Why don’t you go take a quick shower and change into something of mine?”

“Oh god, thank you, Ellie. This horse shit stinks. Jeff will need to take a shower, too, and borrow something of Gunner’s.”

“I don’t even want to know,” Ellie said as she looked over at Jeff.

“No, you don’t, but I will say that your brother sure can make me happy one minute and so pissed-off the next.”

Ellie put her fingers up to her ears. “Eww…eww…stop! Yuck!”

I started to walk away when I heard Ellie say to Jeff, “Oh no, you horny ass. You go shower in the guest bathroom. I’ll bring you a pair of sweats and a T-shirt.”

I turned and looked over my shoulder at Jeff.

He smiled and winked at me. Then, he mouthed, Sorry.

I couldn’t help but laugh. Yep. Stupid, romantic dickwad.

I sat on Gunner and Ellie’s back porch and watched Ari run around, chasing Luke. I couldn’t help but smile when Luke would scream every time Ari grabbed him and swung him around. I glanced over and saw Ellie with her hand on her stomach, gently moving it up and down. Gunner was holding a sleeping Alex in his arms as he talked to Brad.

Ellie glanced over and smiled at me. I held up my beer to her, and she winked. She said something to Gunner and Brad, and then she made her way over toward me.

“Have you talked to Mom?” Ellie asked as she sat down next to me.

I smiled and nodded. “I did. I still can’t believe she’s moving to Mason.”

Ellie let out a giggle. “I know. What about being engaged to Philip?”

I smiled as I watched Ellie getting all excited from just thinking about it.

She started shaking her head. “I mean, her life has changed so much, and her dreams are finally coming true. She’s getting a nursing job at Mason Memorial Hospital, and Philip asked her to marry him.” Ellie turned and looked at me. “She’s gonna be here for the birth of the baby! I mean…she’ll be here for everything this time.”