“I'm fully aware of what I’m asking. I'm asking that you sacrifice pussy for the club. It’s always been an easy decision for you, Ryder. A no-brainer. Why the resistance now?”
“Well—this time it’s different. Because Jade isn’t just pussy to me. She’s my bitch. My woman. I fucking love her. Yeah.” There: I’d finally declared it, to my boss and president no less. Finally, I was able to formulate all those crazy feelings into words.
Cobra’s eyes widened and his skin went ashen. He slammed a fist on the table.
“Fuck. Why her, Ryder? Of all the fucking bitches in the world . . . It can't work, brother. You’re from different worlds. She’s the rich bitch, and you’re the bad biker. Do I fucking need to remind you of that?”
“Christ, Cobra, do you think I chose this? Do you think I wanted to love the snarky bitch that pushes all my buttons—good and bad? No. I didn't choose it. It chose me. My fucking heart can't be told who to love and who not to love. It fucking is what it is, brother.”
I sank into the chair, spearing my fingers through my hair. This was as fucked up as it could get. Cobra telling me to let go of Jade. Did he fucking know what he was asking of me?
I hung my head, letting it rest on my chest as I closed my eyes. Anything. I would do anything for Cobra, anything for my brothers and the Scorpio Stinger MC.
Anything, but this.
Because fuck me, now that I’d tasted the love of a woman as sweet as Jade, I wanted more of it. Cobra could not be asking me to give up this one thing I wanted more than my next breath.
Cobra cleared his throat. “As your president, I'm asking you, Ryder. I'm asking for all the lives of your brothers, past and present. Let Jade go. You know there can come no good of it. You know it’s fucked. It will lead to bloodshed. You know.”
I jumped up from the chair. Fuck. I needed to punch something—anything. I slammed one fist into the wall, then another. It hurt like fuck, but it was nothing like the pain of my heart that was breaking in two. I'd waited all my life to feel like this. Since the day Marianne had left, and never come back. Since when first the emptiness, and then the hatred had filled my heart. And now that I’d finally found my woman, Cobra was forbidding it?
“Cobra. You’re my brother. I love you as if you were my own flesh and blood. Because to me, you are. But what you’re asking—it’s impossible. Jade is a part of me I don’t want to live without. She’s what makes all the years of pain and torment worthwhile. Because I now understand that I had to go through all of that to get to her, so that I could understand what a special gift it is, to be given a love like that. And you, of all people, should know how it feels. Imagine me asking you to give up Mia.”
He growled, shaking his head. He’d rather die than give up Mia. Surely he could understand how I felt? We were bikers, yes. We were criminals, yes. But we were also just human. We loved and hurt as deeply as everyone else. Maybe even deeper.
His mouth drew into a thin line. “Fuck. You are making it hard on us both. You know I love you as my own brother. I want to see you happy with your woman. But it can't be Jade. You have to understand this, Ryder. You and Jade together is bad news for her family and for us—your family. You’re a modern-day fucking Romeo and Juliet. Yeah, I know about that shit, I’m a biker, not a dumbass.” He smiled wryly as he paced the room. This was killing Cobra as much as it was killing me.
“Say goodbye to Jade. Let it be done. It will be better for everybody.”
Everybody but me—and Jade.
Fuck.
Our two worlds were colliding. We were being torn apart.
Fuck.
I couldn’t let it happen.
Jade—and our love—was worth fighting for.
Does she believe that too?
Fuck.
Chapter 21 ~ Jade
Three nights after Harrison’s surprise visit at the compound, I still hadn’t heard from Ryder. Was all that talk of being his woman just crap he came up with to get me to have sex with him? Maybe he got off on dominating woman, telling them he owned them. Then when he tired of them, he moved on to the next target.
Fortunately, I had a really big case to work on at Summers, Walker and Hedgewick, so it kept me pretty occupied during the day. But at night, I lay in my bed, my mind ticking over, running the events nonstop through my brain, like a movie on repeat.
The sweet words Ryder had spoken to me were a refrain by now, I knew them by heart: I never knew someone like you existed. I never knew I could feel like this about another person. It brought a smile to my face, and lightness to my heart. His admission made my toes curl, simply because the same thing had happened to me too, but I wasn’t going to ever admit it to him: I think of you from the moment I open my eyes till the moment I close them. There’s not a minute of a day I'm not thinking of you, aching for you, wanting to be inside you. And my absolute favorite: Only you, babe, nobody else.
But now . . . where was he? I didn't want to believe that he scared this easily. Was what we were both feeling not worth exploring? It was new, it was strange, and it was scary as hell. But it felt really, really good.
What was this thing we both felt? Was it possible that it was . . . love? The expression on his face when he tried to explain how he felt made my heart beat a little faster. I can't name what I feel, because I’ve never felt it before. All I can do is to tell you how happy it makes me feel when I’m near you. And how fucking amazing it feels when I’m inside you. If you can name that, then you know how I feel about you.
A pang shot through my heart. I missed Ryder—his smell, his warmth, and the way he made me feel when he was close. I wanted to be around him every day. Somehow, my life felt empty when the larger-than-life man wasn’t around.
My phone beeped beside me. Ryder? I glanced at the screen, hopeful. But no. It was my cousin from Australia.
“Rebecca? How are you?” I asked. A chat with her would take my mind off my hassles.
“Jade. Sorry to call so late, honey. I'm planning to make a trip to LA in six weeks. Do you think we could catch up again?”
When I last met Rebecca in New York a few months ago, we’d had a fun time together. I needed a distraction. Plus, she was a smart woman and I valued her opinion; maybe I could ask her for advice.
“Of course we can. It’ll be great to see you. I can show you around LA. In fact, come and stay with us?”
“Oh no, I'm coming for work. Usually my boss puts me up in style at a fancy hotel. But I’d love to go on a shopping trip and maybe have a girl’s night out one evening?”
“OK. Sounds good. Let me know the dates and I’ll set it all up. We’ll have a blast.”
“Jade, how’s your relationship coming along? Are you engaged to Marcus yet? Are the wedding invitations coming any time soon?”
I rolled my eyes. Of course—the last time I saw Rebecca, Marcus was courting me. I'd forgotten that I hardly knew Ryder at the time. It felt so long ago.
“Marcus? Oh Lord no, we didn't get engaged. Long story. But he has asked me to accompany him to the annual partner’s ball.”
A growl from my bedroom door startled me. My head jerked up and my gaze fell on Ryder, leaning against the doorjamb, arms folded, a deep frown marring his brow.
“Rebecca, I’ve got to go, honey. Something came up. But we’ll talk soon, okay?”
We said our goodbyes and I hung up, stunned that Ryder had snuck into the house again and was staring down at me, his eyes narrowed, and his jaw set in stone.
“No Marcus. Not happening. Over my dead fucking body,” he growled. “If you want him to stay alive, tell him to fuck off from my woman.”