She had never thought about it that way. She figured by avoiding him as much as possible that she would in some way be able to regain the control she lost when suckered into his enticing thrall. But it didn’t work. All her efforts were futile, and even worse was she had avoided his wonderful presence and wasted a friendship…relationship for years.

“I did those things because of my lack of control. When you touch me Jack, I completely succumb to you. I give into your every whim.”

“But you don’t. Can’t you see that? If you did, we would have had sex two years ago,” he vehemently told her. She let out the breath she hadn’t even realized she’d been holding. He was right. He scooted closer to her in the sand, and grasped her hands in his own. “Because I’ve wanted to be with you every day since then.”

Words were lost on her. She had wanted him too, but things were different. She was with Clark now. Spencer had been a short lived thing, but Clark…he was solid. He had everything she had ever wanted in a relationship. He was caring, attentive, understanding, loving…the list was endless.

The only thing he wasn’t…was Jack.

Jack. With all of his fiery passion and hopeless desire. Jack. Who had secured her a position on the gymnastics team even though she hadn’t spoken to him in months. Jack. Who had always wanted her…since they had first met.

“Lex, I know how you feel about me. I feel that way too. Just…just let me show you what I can be to you,” he said playing with her fingers embedded in the sand.

She sighed and gazed into his crystal clear blue eyes. He wanted her. He had always wanted her. “What does that mean?”

“We’ll do whatever feels natural.”

“You’re talking about having an affair,” she spoke softly.

“No. It can be platonic. We can be friends,” he said taking her hand and interlacing it with his own, “if that’s what you want.”

What he was allowing her was a way in. A way to be with him…without being with him. The dream sounded amazing. It wasn’t everything she wanted, but she couldn’t deny it did have its perks. She could be with him again. She could talk to him and be friends with him. They could be around each other without the automatic hot and cold that came from their forced separation.

“Okay, Jack,” she breathed. “I’m giving you a chance.”

“I’ll show you everything I can be for you,” he said hesitantly reaching forward and in a companionable manner kissed her cheek.

Her breath caught despite the friendly nature of the kiss. Pushing any negative thoughts away, she scooted closer to Jack and together they sat and watched the ebb and flow of the waves before them.

CHAPTER 9

PRESENT

Huffing louder than was necessary, Lexi glanced around Bekah’s guest bedroom in disdain. She had been directed in here to change for Ramsey’s party, but she was currently having second thoughts about whether or not that was smart. She was going to this party because of Jack. Strike one. She wanted to prove that Bekah was a phony. Strike two. And possibly humiliate her brother miserably. Strike three.

Wow. She was in a low place.

She tried to clear her mind of her dark thoughts and really assess the room with an unbiased eye. It was painted powder blue….Carolina blue. Ironic since she attended Duke. The wicker collection had all white bedding, and navy blue curtains hung across the window. Lexi conceded that it was kind of homey. Though the bed could easily be replaced by a wicker crib, and have the same effect. This couldn’t have been an accident. Lexi shuddered.

She realized she simply couldn’t be unbiased about Bekah. She had made up her mind that she would never like her…anything about her. Not that the girl was helping out anything by being kind of crazy and having a pastel, Easter egg colored house.

She popped open her suitcase and rummaged around for something to wear to this damn party. Why had she agreed to go through with this? She was such an idiot. If Chyna could see her now. She just shook her head at how awful that conversation would be. Not caring much how she looked, Lexi pulled on a dark pair of jeans, and unable to resist herself, her favorite, blue-green, lace halter.

“Alright. Let’s get this over with,” she said to herself as she walked into the now empty living room. She wondered where they went, then heard a giggle slice through the silence. Too curious for her own good, Lexi traipsed back down the hallway to the source of the noise.

She stopped suddenly when she heard a loud moan coming from the open door at the end of the hallway. She froze in place, unable to pull away, as she heard Jack and Bekah talking. She knew that she shouldn’t eavesdrop on their conversation, but she couldn’t help herself.

“Jack, come on, stop. She’s right down the hall,” Bekah breathed.

“I don’t want to stop.”

Lexi could hear some more whispers and a few smacking noises that she recognized as kissing. She gulped wishing she had just stayed in the room.

“She’s going to hear us, Jack,” Bekah squealing smacking his hand.

“I don’t care if she hears.”

Lexi blanched at his words. He couldn’t honestly be saying those kinds of things after last night. This made her want to tell Bekah everything. Not just about their past either. She wanted to tell Bekah about Jack coming home early to see her, the pillow fight, staying up all night with her, and almost kissing her. Her hands were shaking at her side.

“Jack,” Bekah mumbled.

“Okay, okay. You’re right. She shouldn’t have to hear this. I hope she didn’t,” he said wistfully.

“I wouldn’t go that far.”

Jack chuckled lightly. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.”

Lexi darted out of the hallway and back into the living room not wanting to be caught. She wasn’t sure what to think of Jack’s comments. Of course, she was pissed, because she wasn’t certain which part he had meant. He had sounded more like himself when he had claimed that he didn’t want her to hear, but she reminded herself that she was biased. Just another thing she would have to figure out before she went back to New York.

When Bekah came out into the living room, Lexi couldn’t help but let her mouth drop open at her ridiculously skimpy outfit. She had on a coral high-waist skirt that barely hit the tops of her alabaster thighs, and a see-through, cream, scoop-neck top that did nothing to hide her skinny figure. Four inch brown heels made her already long legs look even better. Lexi felt plain next to her.

“Oh, you can’t wear that,” Bekah said reviewing Lexi’s outfit choice.

“I seem to be hearing that a lot lately,” she said giving Jack an icy glare.

“Oh well, Ramsey’s parties are a little different than you’d probably expect,” Bekah said choosing each word carefully.

“Fine. Whatever. Let’s just get this over with. What should I wear?” Lexi asked easily giving in.

Twenty minutes later, the three found themselves climbing the stairs to Ramsey’s townhouse in what Lexi recognized to be the ritzy side of Buckhead. The clothing look that Bekah had insisted on was a cross between trampy, smutty, and just a smidge of whore. It had been worth the effort when she had walked back out of the guest bedroom and had Jack, open-mouthed, gaping at her. His eyes traveled from the white lace skirt that accentuated her bronzed skin. Then, he slowly undressed her with his eyes as he traveled upwards to the cleavage bulging out of her blood red tank. Her make-up was smoky and seductive. And though Lexi knew that she looked good without all the added effort, the way that Jack’s eyes turned crystal clear with desire at her approach certainly made up for the extra time it took.