But as I felt his hand reach to pull down my panties, my eyes flew open and I panicked. “Connor…” My body stiffened as I reached for his hand, stopping him from going any further. He pulled his mouth away from my nipple and met my eyes. He tried to hide the disappointment, but it was there, as plain as day, painted all over his face. “I’m sorry. I’m…”

“—Just not ready,” he finished my sentence. He immediately moved off my body and sat at the edge of the bed.

I looked away, consumed with relief and guilt that I wasn’t about to have sex with him. “I’m sorry. It’s just that…all this is so new to me. I feel like I’ve only known you for two weeks.” I looked back at him, hoping he could hear the anguish in my voice. “I desperately wish I could remember everything.” I sat up and grabbed both of his hands and held them to my chest. “Please look at me.”

He met my eyes and I saw the pain in them. “I know, Liv…I’m really trying to be patient.”

“I know.”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have pushed you.”

I shook my head. “No. You haven’t pushed me. You’ve been more than understanding and patient with me over the last two weeks, and I’ve really appreciated it.”

“But you just don’t remember me…” His voice trailed off and I could hear the hurt laced in his words.

“Connor, my body remembers you. My body is responding to you. I’m…I’m really wet and turned on.” My face grew hot with embarrassment as I heard my own admission.

“Really?” He looked at me hopefully.

I laughed softly. “Didn’t you notice how my body reacted to your touch? Or am I imagining things?” I teased.

He flashed me a warm smile and the pain on his face disappeared.

“Please just give me some time to get to know you again.” I was riddled with guilt knowing that I was breaking this man’s heart each time I denied him, each time I stopped him from making love to me. But as much as I tried to force myself to allow it to happen, to see if it would bring back my memories of him, something inside me stopped me. It didn’t matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise, this man was a stranger to me. He was the fiancé of the woman I once was, but he was a stranger to the woman I was now.

***

“Hey, hun.” I heard Connor’s voice in the hallway.

“I’m in the kitchen,” I cried out as I put the sandwich on a plate.

Connor’s face popped into the kitchen and he looked at the plate in my hand. “Making an early lunch?”

“Yeah, I didn’t eat much during breakfast.” I immediately thought of our awkward morning in bed and our almost-as-awkward breakfast where conversation seemed forced. It had gotten so uncomfortable for me that I ended up eating my breakfast quickly so I could excuse myself from the dining room and let Connor finish his breakfast and coffee by himself.

“You know you can have Debra cook you something more…” He frowned at the sandwich. “…Appetizing.”

I laughed. “Don’t mock the sandwich, Connor. Will you believe me if I said that I’ve had flashbacks about this sandwich?”

He raised his eyebrow skeptically at me. “Really?”

I took a bite out of the sandwich and purposefully moaned loudly as I licked the peanut butter from the corner of my lips.

He chuckled and shook his head. “What’s so great about this sandwich?”

“Peanut butter, banana slices, and bacon. It’s like heaven in your mouth, but it tastes like sin.”

He laughed.

“You know you want to take a bite. Come on.” I waved the sandwich up to his face to tempt him.

“I’m allergic to nuts, so no thanks.”

“Oh.” I immediately lowered the sandwich. “Sorry. I didn’t know—I forgot.”

“It’s okay.” Then he frowned. “You know what? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you eat this sandwich before.”

His comment surprised me. “Really?”

“Really. You can even ask Debra to see if you’ve ever asked her to make you some, but I can’t remember ever seeing you eating it.”

“Hmm.” I thought about the broken piece of memory that had come back to me about this sandwich. “I remember loving this when I was younger.”

“What was your flashback about?” He looked at me with curiosity.

I frowned. “It’s actually one of those memories where I can only see a few seconds of what had happened. I just remember being made this sandwich and loving it, and…I don’t know how to explain it, but I know that I used to eat it all the time when I was younger.”

“Hmm. Maybe you grew out of it?” he offered as he swung his laptop bag over his shoulder. “Anyway, my train into New York City leaves in twenty minutes, so I have to get going.”

“Okay.” I leaned toward him and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“I’m sorry that I have to leave you right now, but it’s only for twenty-four hours. An important client wants to have an emergency meeting over a time-sensitive business venture in the New York office this afternoon. Since I’m there, my secretary scheduled several hours of meetings throughout the day tomorrow. So I won’t be back until tomorrow evening. Are you okay here by yourself?”

“Don’t worry. I’ll be fine.”

He sighed. “Usually you’d come with me to these meetings.”

My brows furrowed at his words. I don’t know why, but his words stung.

“No, that’s not what I meant,” he quickly corrected when he saw the expression on my face. “I know you’re not ready to go back to work yet, and the doctor said it’s best to ease you back into your regular routine. That’s not what I meant, honey. I just meant that I’m not used to being away from you for this long.”

I looked up at him. “But it’s only a day.”

He chuckled. “Yeah. You’re absolutely right.” He shook his head and sighed. “I can’t believe how inseparable we were. After we started dating, I’m pretty sure we didn’t go longer than twelve hours without seeing each other.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. I guess between working together, dating, and then moving in together, we saw each other a lot. And when you were in the hospital, I visited you every night after work and usually stayed the night.”

“Maybe that’s why you didn’t get a good night’s sleep,” I teased as I grinned up at him. I realized that I felt indebted to his kindness and devotion to me. “I’m a really lucky girl, Connor.” I buried my face into his warm embrace and heard the even thump of his heart as it pounded against my ear.

“I love you, Liv. I just hate to leave you alone, especially when you’re still adjusting.”

I pulled away and smiled up at him. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. I’ll keep myself busy.”

“Are you sure?”

I nodded.

“What do you have planned for today?”

“Well, I’m still going through all my old photo albums, and I want to start combing through my emails. I think that might help jog some memories.”

“Sounds like a plan. If you need help with anything, just ask Debra or Jim. Bill will be in New York with me.”

“Okay, cool.” I felt a mixture of guilt and relief as a wave of excitement overcame me when I realized that I was about to have a whole day to myself. It was strange to live with and constantly see someone when you had very few memories of them, and I welcomed this precious time alone. It felt as if I had some extra room to breathe.

“I’ll be home by early evening tomorrow. Do you want to go to Talula’s Garden for dinner when I get back?”

“Where?”

He let out a warm chuckle. “It’s the farm-to-table restaurant that you love in the city. It’s one of your favorite places to eat.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. You love the skirt steak and sweet ricotta doughnut there.”

“That does sound delicious.” My stomach rumbled in agreement and I blushed.

He snickered. “Looks like your stomach hasn’t forgotten. I promise you, it’s way better than that sandwich in your hand.”

“We’ll agree to disagree on that comment there.” I playfully rolled my eyes and took a big bite from the sandwich.