As we walked up to the steps, Macie leaned over and whispered, “He sounded normal on the phone right?”

She seemed as nervous as I felt. “Yes.”

I knocked on the door twice and stood back to wait. I heard someone moving through the house before the door swung open. A tall, skinny, blond guy stood in front of me with a big grin on his face. He puffed out some air to blow his long shaggy locks out of his eyes and then reached out to shake hands.

“Hey I’m Seth, you must be Keegan.”

I held out my hand and said, “Actually, I’m Keegan. This is my friend Macie.”

I didn’t know whether I should be offended that he assumed Macie was me, or if he had high hopes when he opened the door that my tall brunette bombshell of a best friend could be his potential roommate. Either way, I watched his smile falter a bit, and I knew I was right. Well, that was strike one against him. He quickly righted himself and shook my outstretched hand.

“Nice to meet you Keegan. Please, come in. I apologize for the mess. I just got out of class, and I didn’t have time to clean up very much before you got here.” He turned and made his way into what I assumed to be the living room.

I looked around the place and saw empty pizza boxes and beer cans strewn all about. It smelled like sweaty gym socks, and his furniture consisted of two lawn chairs and a television that sat atop of a couple of stacked pallets. There was a couch in the center of the wall upholstered in fabric covered with burnt orange flowers. It reminded me of something that would have been popular in the seventies.

Strike two.

“You can have a seat if you’d like.” He pointed to the lawn chair.

I looked over at Macie and tried not to laugh. “That’s okay. So can you tell me a little bit more about the place, and the room I’d be renting?”

“Room? This house is a one bedroom with a living room, kitchen, and bathroom. I have the bedroom, and you’d get the couch. But no worries about all your clothes and stuff. That closet behind you has plenty of space for those plastic Tupperware drawers.”

Was he serious? Judging by the way he was looking at me, he was every bit serious. I swallowed hard. Oh boy, this wasn’t good. “Uhhh… would you be willing to give me the bedroom so I could have a little bit more privacy?”

He glanced from Macie, whom he clearly was checking out, back to me. “Look, if you’re worried about privacy, don’t worry about that. I have a TV in my room so when it’s time for you to sleep, I can just go back there. You can change in the bathroom, and I’ll make sure the guys from my fraternity don’t bother you when they are over. Ground rules will be laid out, and your stuff won’t be messed with.”

My mouth was hanging open by this point. “You can’t be serious. This is a joke right? I’m being Punked. Macie,” I turned to look at her, “cut the crap. You set this up, right?”

She bit her lip to keep from laughing. “No honey, I had nothing to do with this. I think Seth here is dead serious.”

“What are you two talking about? It’s a pretty sweet deal if you ask me. One of my frat brothers wanted the couch, but I told him it depended on what you thought. And truthfully, I sorta wanted a chick as a roomy.” He grinned at me.

I shivered, grossed out. He genuinely thought I would take the offer. I didn’t know if he was just stupid, on crack, or a combination of both, but there wasn’t a woman on earth who would accept no privacy, plastic drawers, and not having her own bathroom.

Strike three.

“Unfortunately Seth, I don’t think this is what I am looking for. But I do hope you find the right roommate.” I turned to walk toward the front door, and Macie followed behind me.

“Well, if you or your friend ever change your mind, or are looking for a party, hit me up.”

Macie turned toward him and gave him a salute. “Will do Sethy.”

We shut the door and all but ran to the car. When we got into the Beamer I looked at her as she looked at me, and we both burst out laughing. She was putting the car in reverse, and I was never happier to leave a place.

“Oh dear God,” I said wiping my eyes. “I feel sorry for the person who takes the couch. I’m pretty sure I saw the cushions moving.”

She was in hysterics. “Stop, stop, I have to pee.”

We laughed a bit more before she settled enough to say, “Okay, where’s the next place?”

I gave her the address, and we were off to meet possible roommate number two.

This place was a bit better. It was a couple of miles south of the university, which was still okay. I couldn’t necessarily walk to school or work, but driving wasn’t so bad. It was a smaller apartment complex that appeared to be well kept. Granted, the building was a tad outdated, but that didn’t mean the inside was shoddy. If there was one thing I knew, it was to never judge a book by its cover.

“This one is for the girl right?” Macie asked as she got out of the car.

“Yup.” I looked down on the piece of paper I wrote her apartment number on. “She said she lived on the bottom floor on the corner.”

We walked past a couple of doors before I found the number she’d given me. I knocked, and we waited. And we waited…and we waited some more.

“Are we early?” Macie looked at her phone.

“No, she told me she’d be here. Let me knock again.” I put my fist up and pounded on the door with the padded side of my hand.

When the door opened, a short girl with jet black hair and a nose ring answered. Her eyes were caked with black eyeliner and her lipstick was… holy crap was that purple? She didn’t say anything, she was just staring. I felt like her eyes were laser pointers, and she was shooting me with her death rays. Ack! I was already uncomfortable. Needing to break the awkward silence, I stepped forward and held out my hand.

“Hi, I’m Keegan, I called about the apartment.”

She looked down and then back up at me. “Who’s that?” Her head tipped toward Macie.

“That’s my friend Macie, she’s tagging along.”

She looked Macie up and down, and then did the same to me. She must have deemed us acceptable, because she stepped aside and let us in. As I walked through the entryway hall, I heard music, if you could call it that. With each step I took, it got louder and louder. At first I thought, what an unusually long hallway, but when we got into the open living room, the better question was, how on earth did we not hear this racket from outside? There were drums set up in one corner with a guy sitting behind them, a microphone a few feet in front of the drums that another guy with a Mohawk was screaming into, and a person behind a guitar. I couldn’t say whether or not said person was a guy or girl… those people Macie and I called Pat. Either a Patrick or a Patty, but you didn’t know which. Turning around I looked at the girl who let us in. I oddly found myself hoping she was the possible roommate. She seemed less scary than Drummer boy, Mohawk Man, or Pat.

When the screaming/singing stopped, I asked Goth Girl, “Are you Jennifer?” I almost laughed at the sweet name for her.

“Yes. These are my bandmates. I’ll just start off by telling you that we practice every single day from three till seven, sometimes later. The manager let us soundproof the space when we moved in.”

Macie mumbled under her breath, “That explains it.” I bit my lip to stifle my laugh.

“Your room would be in the back. No overnight guests, if your friends have an issue with anybody in my band, you’re gone, and I hope you’re not a morning person because I sleep till noon.”

Why was she still scowling at me like she wanted to pinch my head between her thumb and pointer fingers? “O-kay,” I drew out. “Would you mind if I opened the blinds at least? It’s pretty dark in here.”

If looks could kill… “I’d rather you not. I like the dark. Dark makes me feel things, and then I write about it. The blinds stay closed.”