“I can’t take much of that,” he whispered roughly. His hands held her hips now, an intimacy that she should have protested, but she was too weak. “Do it properly.”

“Not yet,” she whispered. Her teeth closed softly on his lower lip, tugging at it sensuously. She felt him tremble as her tongue traced his upper lip.

“Meredith,” he bit off, and his hands hurt her for an instant.

“All right.” She knew what he wanted, what he needed. She opened her mouth on his and slid her tongue inside it, and the reaction she got from him was electrifying.

He cried out. His arms swallowed her, bruising her against his hard chest. He was trembling. Meredith felt the soft tremors with exquisite awareness, with pride that she could arouse him that easily after a beauty like Nina.

“Blake,” she whispered under his mouth, and closed her eyes as she gave him the weight of her body, the warmth of her mouth.

She felt him move. Her back was suddenly against the wall and he was easing down over her body.

Her eyes flew open and his head lifted fractionally, and all the while his body overwhelmed hers, his hips lying heavy and hard against hers, pressing against her.

She could feel the full strength of his arousal now, and it should have frightened her, but it didn’t. He was slow and gentle, not impatient at all as his hands slid to her hips, holding her.

“This should really frighten the hell out of you, shouldn’t it?” he asked huskily, searching her eyes. “You can feel what I want, and I’m not quite in control right now.”

“You aren’t hurting me,” she whispered. “And I started it this time.”

“So you did.” He moved down, letting his mouth repeat the soft, arousing movements hers had made earlier. “Like that, Meredith?” he whispered at her lips. “Is that how you like it?”

“Yes,” she whispered back, excitement making her voice husky. Her hands were against his shirt and she could feel the heat from his body under the fabric.

“I want to open my shirt and let you touch me,” he whispered roughly. “But that might be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, and there’s a long, comfortable sofa just a few feet inside the door.”

The thought was more than tempting. She could already feel his skin against hers, his body overwhelming hers. She wanted him, and there wasn’t really any reason to say no. Except that her pride couldn’t take the knowledge that he wanted only her body and nothing else about her.

“I can’t sleep with you,” she said miserably. She let her head rest against him, drowning in the feel of his body over hers. “Blake, you have to stop,” she groaned. “I’m going crazy…!”

“So am I.” He pushed himself away from her, breathing roughly. His darkened green eyes looked down into hers. “You wanted me,” he said, as if he were only just realizing it.

She flushed and looked up at his hard face. “I don’t understand what you want from me.”

“Sarah needs a woman’s companionship,” he said tersely.

“That isn’t why you made love to me,” she returned, searching his eyes.

He sighed deeply. “No, it isn’t.” He walked to the edge of the porch and leaned against one of the white columns, looking out over the wide expanse of flat land. The only trees were right around the house, where they’d been planted. Beyond was open land, dotted with a few willows at the creek and a few straggly bushes, but mostly flat and barren all the way to the horizon.

“Why, Blake?” she asked. She had to know what he was after.

“Do you know what an obsession is, Meredith?” he asked a minute later.

“Yes, I think so.”

“Well, that’s what I feel for you.” He shifted so that he could see her. “Obsessed,” he repeated, letting his green eyes slide over her sensually. “I don’t know why. You aren’t beautiful. You aren’t even voluptuous. But you arouse me as no other woman ever has or ever will. I couldn’t even feel for Nina what I feel for you.” He laughed coldly. “After she left me, there wasn’t anyone else. I couldn’t. I don’t want anyone but you.”

She didn’t know if she was still breathing. The admission knocked the wind out of her, took the strength from her legs. She looked at him helplessly.

“You haven’t…seen me in five years,” she said, trying to rationalize.

“I’ve seen you every night,” he ground out. “Every time I closed my eyes. My God, don’t you remember what I did to you that day in the stable? I stripped you….” He closed his eyes, oblivious to her scarlet face and trembling body. “I looked at you and touched you and put my mouth on you.” He bit back a curse and opened his eyes again, tormented. “I see you in my bed every damned night of my life,” he breathed. “I want you to the point of madness.”

She caught the railing and held on tight. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. It wasn’t possible for a man to feel that kind of desire, she told herself. Not when he didn’t feel anything emotional for the woman. But Blake was different. As Elissa said, he’d never been loved, so he didn’t know what it was. But all men felt desire. A man didn’t have to love to want.

“Don’t worry—” he laughed mockingly “—I’m not going to force you into anything. I just wanted you to know how I felt. If that sensuous little kiss was some sort of game, you’d better know how dangerous it is. I’m not sane when I touch you. I wouldn’t hurt you deliberately for the world, but I want you like hell.”

Her swollen lips parted. “I wasn’t playing,” she said with quiet pride. “It was no game. You…” She hesitated. “You seemed so disturbed because you’d been rough. I wanted to show you that you hadn’t made me afraid.”

He watched her unblinkingly. “You weren’t, were you?” he said then, scowling. “Not even when I brought you close and let you feel what you were doing to me.”

She shifted. “You shouldn’t have,” she murmured evasively.

“Why hide it?” he asked. He moved toward her, encouraged by her response and her lack of bitterness. He was taking a hell of a chance by being honest with her, but it might be his only way of reaching her. “You might as well know it all.”

She lifted her face as he stood over her. “Know what?”

“Nina was my first woman,” he said bluntly. “And the only woman.”

She wanted to sit down, but there was no chair. She leaned against the banister, her eyes searching his hard face. He wasn’t kidding. He meant it.

“That’s right,” he said, nodding when he saw the memories replaying in her eyes. “The day we were in the stable together, I was as inexperienced as you were. That’s why I was rough. It wasn’t deliberate. I didn’t know how to make love.”

Her lips opened on a slow breath. “No wonder…” she whispered.

“Yes, no wonder.” He brushed a strand of loosened hair from her pale cheek. “Why don’t you laugh? Nina did.”

She could feel the hurt under that mocking statement. What it must have done to his pride! “Nina was a—” She bit back the word.

He laughed coldly. “She certainly was,” he agreed. “She taunted me with it toward the end,” he added, his eyes bitter and cynical. “I didn’t want to risk that kind of ridicule again, so there weren’t any more women.”

“Oh, Blake,” she whispered, closing her eyes on a wave of pain. “Blake, I’m so sorry!”

“I don’t want pity. I wanted you to know the truth. If you’re ever tempted to give in to me, you’re entitled to know what you’d be up against. My God,” he said heavily, moving away, “I don’t even know the basics. Books and movies don’t make up for experience. And Nina wasn’t interested in tutoring me.”

“I wish I’d known,” she said huskily. “I wish I’d known five years ago.”

He looked back at her, his thick eyebrows raised. “Why?”

“I wouldn’t have fought you,” she said simply. “I thought you were terribly experienced.” She lowered her eyes. “I’m sorry. I guess I hurt your ego as much as you frightened me.”

He studied her in a tense silence. “You don’t have a thing to apologize for. I’m the one who’s sorry.” He waited until she lifted her head, and he caught her eyes and held them. “You haven’t wanted anyone, in all this time?”