Well, and Keith’s, if things kept progressing.

Regardless of how things ended up with Keith, Scott now knew he needed to pursue this path, unfortunately away from Noel.

* * * *

When Scott pulled into their driveway, Noel’s car sat parked in its usual spot. As he sat there, the engine running, he tried to replace his mental image of Keith kissing him good-bye in the parking lot of the resort an hour earlier with one of Noel kissing him good-bye before he left late Friday.

He couldn’t.

He could still conjure Keith’s taste, his scent.

The feel of him beating his ass.

The feel of him in his ass.

Shutting off the car, he took a deep breath. This wouldn’t be an easy or a fun talk. Maybe even more difficult than his talk with her when he finally drew enough courage to admit to her what he felt about himself.

How he’d sincerely hoped her being his Domme would be enough for him. That he’d be able to get by on that, able to purge other thoughts and desires from his brain.

No, not so much, unfortunately.

And especially not now, not since Keith came into his world and obliterated every preconceived notion he’d had about himself and his life up until this point. Scott knew he couldn’t truly be happy with Noel, and it wasn’t fair to her. He couldn’t be the husband she needed, the one she deserved. She deserved happiness every bit as much as he did. More, because she’d tried her hardest the past couple of years. Given up bits of herself to try to make this happen for him.

It was time to finally admit defeat and plan the next stage of their lives. There was no easy answer here. Either way, someone got screwed in a bad way. Whether him by giving up pursuing what he knew he needed out of life, or Noel if he didn’t.

Nobody won.

Someone got screwed no matter which way he turned.

He got out of the car, retrieved his things from the trunk, and headed inside. She was on the couch, grading papers with the TV on.

The look on her face telegraphed her hope, her dread, her fear.

He set his bags down in the hall and walked over to kiss her hello.

“Did you have a good time?”

Unspoken and layering her question were all the things he knew she wouldn’t outright ask. Not unless he volunteered them.

“We need to talk.”

* * * *

If there were four words strung together in the English language that could instill as much dread in a person, Noel didn’t know what they were. Her heart had started pounding as soon as she’d heard his car in the driveway. Even harder once she’d heard him coming through the front door.

Now it felt like it was trying to break free of her rib cage and gallop screaming through the house.

She slowly set the pile of papers she was working on out of the way on the coffee table before sitting back and forcing herself to look him in the eyes. “Okay,” she said. “Let’s talk.”

After ten years of marriage, she was well acquainted with his body language, his quirks and tics and tells. The way he clasped his hands together in his lap reminded her of the night two years earlier when, after a couple of beers, he’d made his bombshell admission to her.

This was the other shoe, the first dropped that night.

“I met someone this weekend.”

A litany of responses tripped through her brain, but she settled on silently nodding.

“I’d like to date him,” Scott continued. “We really seemed to hit it off. He lives in Sarasota. And he wants to meet you to talk with you and make sure you’re really okay with this.”

Another nod.

He stared at her.

She stared back.

Finally, he broke the uncomfortable silence. “What do you think?”

“I already told you, you have my permission, as long as you’re safe. I don’t know what else you want from me.” Okay, that came out a little snippier than she’d intended. “I knew this was inevitable.”

“I need to know you’re okay with this.”

“Am I okay with this?” A tiny switch flipped in her brain and all the things she hadn’t wanted to say came spilling out. “Am I okay with my husband admitting he thinks he’s gay and submissive and then spending two years of my life trying to maintain a facade of denial that I didn’t know it wasn’t a matter of if, but when he finally found someone else? No, Scott. I’m dandy.”

“I’m sorry.”

She took a deep breath and focused her attention on the ceiling for a moment in an attempt to regain her composure.

This isn’t who she wanted to be.

She finally looked at him again. “I’m sorry,” she said, that rage finally vented and relieving a little emotional pressure. “I swore I wouldn’t be like that, but I’m only human.” She reached out and took his hand. “I do want you to be happy. And I know you’re upset about me being upset. I get it. Yes, I’ll talk to him. You were safe this weekend, right?”

He nodded.

She couldn’t help it. She played dirty, squeezing his hand and standing, tugging him with her. “Then it’s time to take care of me, isn’t it?” she asked in the Domme tone that she’d become very adept at using on him over the past two years.

He stood. “Yes, Ma’am.”

He let her lead him to their bedroom.

* * * *

An hour later, lying in bed with Noel dozing, Scott stared at the ceiling, more conflicted than ever.

Yes, he loved Noel. Was he really going to throw away ten years of marriage?

On the bedside table next to him his phone vibrated. He reached over and picked it up, a text from Keith on the screen.

Everything okay?

The weekend came racing back, flooding his mind, his heart, his soul.

Thinking about it, his thumb hovered over the screen for a moment before he typed in his reply.

We talked. She’s okay.

Keith replied almost immediately.

When?

He glanced at Noel, still napping next to him. He’d need to confirm that with her.

I’ll find out from her and let you know by tomorrow.

Another rapid response.

Good boy.

His heart twisted.

Yes, this is what he wanted. Needed.

Thank You, Sir.

Chapter Eleven

Noel had wanted home-court advantage. She told Scott that Keith could come over Tuesday night and have pizza or something with them while they talked. Actually, having Scott back home after his weekend away, and then having sex with him immediately, had soothed her, in a way.

She knew he wasn’t playing her. Wasn’t just going through some midlife crisis. She knew Scott really loved her and this was tearing him up inside.

That made it easier for her, somehow, even though she didn’t know why.

In a way, there was also relief. No more waiting, and no more pretending to be a Domme from this point on. She could be herself again. Just Noel.

She jumped when the doorbell rang a little after seven thirty Tuesday night. The pizza had arrived five minutes earlier, so she knew it wasn’t that.

She let Scott answer it.

She heard a male voice, a silent pause that was likely a kiss or hug—or maybe both—in greeting, then the sound of them walking into the kitchen behind her. She stood at the sink, washing a couple of stray dishes.

Steeling herself, she rinsed her hands, dried them, slapped on a smile, and turned.

Her heart thudded. Before her stood a handsome hunk of a guy.

Holy. Shit.

Scott hadn’t just landed himself a guy, but a god.

She performed a quick check to make sure her jaw wasn’t gaping.

Scott made the introductions. “Keith Knepp, this is Noel. Noel, Keith.”

She nodded. “Hi.”