Rachel tsked. “Oh, she did. She changed for the worse.”

After hearing about my encounter with Caryn, the girls decided it was time for the tree house slumber party. We arranged everything for Thursday night.

In my PJs, I felt like a kid ready to sneak cookies from the hidden cookie jar in the middle of the night.

“I would love if we changed subjects,” I said.

“Oh, come on!” Rachel made a puppy face. “It’s good to talk about bitches. It makes us feel better, in spirit and as a person.”

We laughed.

I grabbed the quilts from my bed. “Okay, but then let’s talk about another bitch.”

“Not fun,” Sophie said, following Rachel and me downstairs. “She’s a good bitch to rant about.”

“Oh, you don’t know,” Rachel said. “We aren’t sure if it’s true, but we heard Caryn is a call girl around the Columbia and Charlotte area.”

I almost tripped on the stairs and fell. “What?”

Rachel grabbed my arm to steady me. “Yeah, we first heard about that a year ago.”

“See, she’s a good bitch to talk shit about,” Sophie said.

“Seriously, girls, I’m done with her.” I hoped they actually changed subjects, because I wasn’t talking about Caryn anymore.

“You girls ready?” Mama asked from the kitchen. She propped the back door open for us. “I’ll bring some ice cream in a minute.”

Rachel paused beside her and kissed her cheek. “You’re the best, Mrs. Hayes.”

Mama chuckled as we passed her and walked out into the balmy night.

I stared at the tree. I had cleaned it, sort of, the previous weekend, but still wasn’t happy about the prospect of sleeping there. What if the wood was rotten on the inside and didn’t support our weight?

Sophie was the first to climb up the wood planks nailed to the tree trunk. I handed her the lamp, the quilts, and the pillows, then climbed up next. Rachel was about to come up when Mama appeared with a tray and three bowls spilling with so much ice cream and hot fudge.

She took the tray and kissed Mama again. “I mean it. The best.”

“Thanks, Mama,” I whispered, peering down.

“Thanks, Mrs. Hayes,” Sophie said from somewhere inside the tree house.

With a smile, Mama nodded and walked back inside the house.

Rachel extended the tray to me and, reaching down, I grabbed it, then she climbed up.

“Got it,” Sophie squealed as the first lamp began shinning.

She turned to the other as Rachel set the tray on the floor, and I examined the place.

It was tiny, too tiny with the three of us. I could barely stand without hitting my head on the ceiling, and the floor creaked whenever one of us moved. The furniture and the drapes that covered the two windows were gone. Sophie spread the quilts on the floor, and I realized we would fit there if we all slept closed together, probably touching. This wouldn’t be a good night for sleep.

Well, if I left it to the girls, we wouldn’t be sleeping, only talking the entire night.

We sat down on the floor, the tray among us, and dug into the ice cream. It was homemade, of course, and delicious.

“Can I borrow your mother?” Rachel asked. “I need her cooking at all times.”

“Nu-uh.” Sophie shook her spoon. “Can you imagine how many pounds you would put on if you only ate Mrs. Hayes’s food? It would be terrible.”

“True.” Rachel nodded, and then glanced at me. “I don’t know how you’re still so skinny.”

“Rachel!” Sophie hissed.

“What?” Rachel looked shocked. “What did I do?”

“It’s okay,” I said. “What Sophie means is that I wasn’t here for almost four years. Maybe that’s why.”

Rachel gasped. “Oh crap. I keep forgetting and saying the wrong shit.”

“Since we touched that topic,” Sophie started. She licked her spoon, eyeing me, probably gauging my reaction. “You’ve been putting off talking to us about your life in Cleveland, and about how you really are, Jess.”

I spooned my ice cream, suddenly unsure I wanted to eat more. “Honestly, I don’t know how I am. It’s hard to talk about it when even I’m not sure about anything.”

Rachel patted my knee. “I’m sorry. And I’m sorry you had to face Caryn this week. I wish I were there though. I would have jumped on her and clawed that fake hair out of her head.”

Sophie snorted, and I couldn’t help but chuckle, imagining the scene in my mind.

“Yeah, but it wasn’t funny. I was shaking, and if it weren’t for Jason and Ryan, I don’t know what would have happened.”

“About that,” Sophie said, her tone malicious again. “I heard you guys have seen each other a few times. How was it?”

“Awkward and painful.” I sighed.

Rachel put her hand on my arm. “Jess, you’ve been through some pretty messed up stuff and, as far as we know, you never talked about it with anyone.”

Sophie set her empty ice cream bowl aside. “Talk to us.”

“It’s not something I like talking about.”

“We know,” Sophie said. “But maybe that’s exactly what you need, to vent about it.”

I played with my ice cream. “I talked to my grandma and also my best friend up there, Kristin.”

Rachel face fell. “Oh. That’s good though, right? I mean, you vented then.”

“I didn’t exactly vent. I just told them the events.” I put my half-eaten ice cream aside. “There isn’t much to vent though. Ryan broke my heart, and my father called me a slut and hit me in front of half the town. It’s done.”

“See, you think there’s nothing to vent about.” Rachel reached for my bowl of ice cream and started eating what I had not. “You need closure.”

That again.

“Yes,” Sophie said. “You should talk to Ryan.”

“Everyone keeps saying that. I’m sure he doesn’t even remember what he did and how that hurt me. Sometimes I even think he only remembers me or still knows my name because of my brother.”

Rachel dropped her spoon. “What?”

“You’re kidding, right?” Sophie asked, her eyes wide.

I looked from one to another. “What? No. Why?”

Sophie squinted. “Jason didn’t tell you what happen to him after you left? What he did?”

“Hm, I don’t know what happened, and Jason doesn’t want to tell me,” I said. Rachel exchanged a worried look with Sophie. “You guys are making me nervous. What is it?”

“Why doesn’t Jason tell you?” Rachel asked.

“He says that I should ask Ryan and have him tell me.” I grunted. “As if I would knock on his door and ask him. Besides, I don’t even know where his house is now. Apparently, he’s not living with his parents anymore.”

“He rents an apartment over the abandoned Blockbuster downtown,” Rachel said.

That was a half block from Alan’s company.

“Since when?” Again, they exchanged an odd look, and I clenched my fist around the spoon. “Come on, tell me.”

Sophie sighed. “I would love to tell you like it was juicy gossip, but this is serious. Ryan should be the one to tell you.”

A chill rushed down my spine. Was it that bad that even my girls didn’t want to tell me?

***

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” I muttered from the shotgun of Rachel’s car.

Sophie leaned forward between the seats and smiled at me. “I’m glad you’re doing this.”

I fidgeted with my nails, a nervous habit I had since my pre-teens.

Rachel reached over and rested her hand on mine. “It’s going to be okay. Ryan won’t be there.”

“That’s what you keep saying, but I guess I’ll only believe it when I see it. Or don’t see it.”

The slumber party went well last night. We actually went to sleep at five in the morning. Then the sun was up and bothering us, and we moved to my bedroom and slept until noon. Thank goodness, I made my own hours at work. Otherwise, I would already be fired. I went in at one and left at five.

At eight, the girls showed up, inviting me to watch a race. Inviting was actually a nice word for it. They practically hauled me into Rachel’s car. For a moment, I thought they would knocked me out, or tie me and drag me to the damn race.