“Yes.”

She continues to explain the process of a vaginal ultrasound since my blood work numbers show that I’m early in pregnancy. She makes sure it’s okay that Nicole stays in the room with me and I insist on it. I don’t want to do this alone. A pang of guilt hits me because I know he’s out there. Max is in the waiting room and he should be here to see our baby for the first time.

The doctor sets up the machine and positions me on the table. The overall process is not as much uncomfortable as it is awkward. I’m staring at the screen even though I have no idea what I’m looking for.

“There,” she points at the screen, her fingers lands on a small black circle, “that right there is your baby.”

“Baby?” Maxton’s deep voice rumbles from the door. It only takes him a few strides with his long legs to get to me. He stalks to the side of my bed. Nicole steps back, allowing him to get close to me. He drops to his knees and grabs my hands. He brings them to his lips. His eyes lock on the screen. My eyes are locked on him. He swallows hard. “We made a baby?” he says.

The doctor clears her throat, causing me to tear my eyes away from Max. I can see the question in her eyes; I nod, letting her know it’s okay to speak in front of him. The cat is already out of the bag. “As I was saying, this,” she points at the screen, “is your baby. You’re very early in your pregnancy; from the measurements, you are four weeks along. Everything looks as it should. I’ll prescribe you prenatal vitamins that you will need to take daily. You should schedule an appointment with an obstetrician in the next four to six weeks.” She removes the wand, again awkward, gathers her machine and leaves.

“I’m just going to give you two a minute,” Nicole says.

Maxton, still holding onto my hands, rests his forehead against my belly. Never able to resist touching him, I run my fingers through his hair. We’re silent for a long time, neither one of us saying anything. When he finally looks at me, his cheeks are wet with moisture, eyes wet and red from his tears. “I love you so fucking much, Kensington James.” Taking one hand away from mine, he cups my face. “You scared the hell out of me, beautiful. When I saw you lying on the floor,” he swallows hard, “I thought I lost you, Kensi.” He leans forward and kisses my forehead.

I start to talk, but he places his index finger over my lips. “I got your letter,” he says solemnly. “There is no choice, Kensington. You are a part of my soul. You don’t walk away from your soul. I need for you to understand what you mean to me.” The hand that is now resting on my stomach, rubs gently. “What this baby means to me.” He moves to sit on the edge of the bed, his eyes boring into mine. “I don’t know if I have the words to explain it to you. You are always in my thoughts. There is not one moment of any day that you are not there. You light up my world. I thought I never wanted this, someone to call mine. Never thought I wanted to be that guy who shouts from the rooftops that he’s going to be a dad.” He smiles at me and places his hand back on my belly. “You make me that guy. Your love makes me a better man. I don’t want to go through life without you by my side. I need you there, Kensi. I need to know, that above all else, I will always have you. You are what I want. You own me heart and soul. I want to wake up with you every fucking day in my arms. I want to fall asleep the same way. I want to raise this baby with you, show him or her what it means to love and be loved. I want you to have my last name. I want every moment of every day filled with us.”

Hot tears are racing down my cheeks. How did I ever think I could walk away from him? Mom must have sent him to me. I know she would have loved him. I smile at the thought.

“There’s my beautiful girl,” he says, tenderly tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

“Maxton…” His lips softly touch mine. My resolve is broken. His words crumbled the last bit of resistance I was hanging onto.

Breaking away from the kiss, his lips trail down my neck and up to my ear. “We made a baby, Kens. A part of me is growing inside of you.” He pulls away so he can see my face. “I can’t explain how that feels.” His hand is back on my belly yet again. His palm is lying flat, his fingers splayed. “I can’t wait to take this journey with you.”

“I love you,” I say through my tears. “I’m sorry I left; I didn’t want to come between you. I didn’t want you to resent me.”

“Never.” His words hold conviction. “We’re a family, you, me and this little peanut.” He holds up the ultrasound picture. “I’ve never wanted anything in my life as much as I want this with you.”

“Knock, knock,” my dad says from the doorway. I quickly wipe my eyes. Maxton, however, does not. His cheeks are still wet from the tracks of his tears.

“Hey, Grandpa,” Maxton says happily.

My dad stops in his tracks, processing his words. I can tell once it really hits him because his face lights up. It’s the same smile he used to give my mother. He’s truly happy again in the moment. My baby did that.

“Grandpa, huh?” he asks, walking to the opposite side of the bed from Max.

Maxton hands him the ultrasound picture as confirmation. “That talk we had, it’s going to happen. I hope you’re with me,” Max says to my dad. I have no idea what they’re talking about, but Dad seems to understand. He nods and his smile grows even bigger, if that’s possible.

“Congratulations.” He kisses me on the cheek. “I think I prefer Papaw though, don’t you?”

Max and I both laugh at his request. There is another knock on the door and in walks Bright and Nicole. “What did we miss?” Bright asks when he sees the three of us smiling.

“This,” Maxton says, handing him the ultrasound picture.

Brighton studies it and then looks up. “What am I looking at exactly?” he asks hesitantly.

“That, young man, is a picture of my first grandchild,” my dad says proudly.

“Holy shit! Congratulations, guys.” He holds his fist out to Max and they bump knuckles.

“How are you feeling?” Nicole asks and I can read between the lines. She wants to make sure I’m okay with Max and the baby.

I look up at Max, who is already looking at me. “Never better,” I say, my eyes never leaving his. He leans down and kisses me on the lips.

“I love you,” he says. His voice is firm and loud. He makes sure everyone in the room heard him, causing me to blush. “Don’t leave me hanging, beautiful.” He chuckles.

“I love you, too.”

THE DOCTOR COMES in and tells us that Kensi will be able to go home tomorrow. I insist that she stays with me. She argues that she’s fine. I need for her to understand that I want to take care of them, her and the baby.

Baby.

I’m going to be a dad.

“I can take care of myself,” she whines.

I cup her cheek in the palm of my hand. “I know you can take care of yourself. I also know I want you with me. I want to be the one you lean on. I want to take care of you.” I place my other hand over her belly. “Both of you.”

I watch as her eyes glass over with tears. This is hard for her. She, like me, never thought what we have was a possibility. She didn’t see herself finding what we have. It’s hard for her to accept that I’m in this.

Forever.

I can tell from the look in her eyes what she’s thinking.

“I can do this—”

I place a finger over her mouth to halt her words. “Not going to happen. I know what you’re thinking, and you’re wrong. I told you I loved you before you… left. I meant it. Baby or no baby, I want you with me.”

Her eyes bore into mine. She has trouble trusting and I know that. I’m okay with it. She will see that I’m not going anywhere. She’s a part of me and we’re having a baby. That’s just about as good as it gets. I really wish Dad were here to see this. To meet her and see how amazing she is, to see me become a dad. I will make damn sure I give our baby the love and support he/she needs.