I want to so bad, but I can’t. “Kipton, that’s not a good idea. I have to go.”

He sighs in defeat, “All right, be careful.”

“I will. Have fun tonight.” I hang up the phone and want to kick myself. A large part of me didn’t want to turn down the invite because guys like Kipton normally don’t give me a second glance. I convince myself he’s just being nice so Cara isn’t alone tonight. It has nothing to do with wanting to see me for himself. Guys like him don’t fall for girls like me—especially if he knew the truth. Nobody wants to deal with the ugly truth.

I’VE SPENT THE LAST HOUR and a half sweating my ass off. Of course I went overboard with my workout hoping I’ll whip myself into shape that much faster. But now, the only thing I want to do is take a cold shower and crawl into my bed.

As my tired body inches closer to the dorm, the walk is the exact opposite from earlier today. While six in the morning is subdued, eight o’clock at night is rowdy. Everyone around me is getting ready to hit the town for a night of drunken debauchery. There’s a couple walking hand in hand; kissing passionately every few steps. At the rate they’re going, they won’t make it off campus anytime soon. To my left a bunch of girls giggle as they stroll down the sidewalk in their tank tops and short skirts. A guy with the longest dreadlocks I’ve ever seen wizzes by me on his skateboard, forcing me off the path and into the grass. Everyone seems to have a place to be—except me. I wrap my arms around myself, suddenly missing the few close friendships I had to leave behind in Ashland. Instead, I’ll have to settle for another movie and an early bedtime.

My stomach growls loudly at the thought of buttery popcorn, reminding me I skipped dinner. Although bummed, I suck it up. So what if I have to miss a few parties and go to bed early. There are much worse problems to have.

With everyone leaving the dorm, the elevator is waiting when I press the button. Inside I stare at the shiny metal wall, processing my defeated reflection. Today might not have gone as smoothly as I wanted in the gym, but tomorrow can only be better. I’m always stronger than I give myself credit for.

I’m surprised when I open the door to my room to find Cara still inside curling her hair. I figured she’d be long gone by now considering how excited she was about going to the party. “Sophie! Hurry and get a shower. I won’t take no for an answer. You had your work-out. Now let’s go find us some cowboys!”

I toss my gym bag on the floor and start chucking my sweaty clothes into the hamper. I’ll have to check out the laundry room sometime tomorrow. “Did you wait here for me?”

“Don’t make me beg, Sophie. I don’t want to go alone and you need to have some fun. You worked your ass off today and deserve to let loose a little. I won’t let you throw away the best years of your life. Now let’s go drink cheap beer and make out with guys we won’t remember in the morning.”

I laugh at her and as tired as I am, I debate my options one last time. Kipton’s voice replays in my mind, he looked so hopeful as he was asking me to come. The triumphant look when I agreed was exhilarating. I’ve wanted to be included for so long, I’m afraid if I blow this chance it won’t return. Just this once. “I’ll go, but I can’t drink. And only for an hour. Then I have to get to bed.”

“I’ll take whatever I can get! It’s been a long ass summer and my roommate last year was a gamer who never left her computer. I’ve finally landed a normal roomie and I intend to take full advantage. Go get ready!”

“Okay!” Rushing through my shower ritual, I realize how exciting it is to actually be doing something age appropriate with my night. I’ve always wanted to experience a real college party. It’s taken me two years of college to get to one, but I’m finally going.

Knowing Kipton will be there has me wanting to look irresistible. Maybe if I look hot enough he will see me as more than his sister’s roommate. The other rational part of my brain knows I don’t do relationships and catching his attention for longer than a minute tonight probably isn’t in the cards. With his sinfully delicious looks, I’m sure there’ll be a flock of hungry vultures swarming him all night. For all I know, he has a girlfriend. Surely someone has claimed him for their own.

Staring at my half full closet trying to figure out what to put on, I choose my favorite pair of distressed jeans with a simple black V-neck shirt. Hoping to dress it up a little, I wear my favorite Alex and Ani bracelet. My lucky horseshoe necklace is also draped delicately around my neck. It was a present from my mom the day of my first gymnastics competition. I won my level that day and have worn it every day since.

“That’s what you’re wearing?” Cara questions. I didn’t realize she was watching me, but she looks appalled by my choice. Sure it’s simple, but I don’t have any tiny skirts that show half of my ass. I’d rather keep Victoria’s Secret a mystery.

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” Glancing down at my shirt, it looks nice enough.

She puts her hands on her hips and huffs. “How do you expect the guys to notice you if you’re dressed the same way they are?”

“I’ll have you know I bought both of these items in the juniors department, not the mens.”

“I’m sure you did. Now let’s sex you up a little. Here put this on.” She tosses me an itty bitty jean skirt with a frayed hem. It looks more like a remnant of fabric than something meant to be worn on its own. Thankfully I’m extra short, so it ends up covering more of my ass to thigh ratio than the average girl.

“Here. Wear this tank.” She hands me a pale pink camisole that looks simple. I slip it on right as she tosses a see through floral top at my head. “Add that over top of the tank. It’s country chic. You’ll fit right in, Sophie.”

I inspect the shirt. It’s forgiving compared to the skin tight tank top. “Can I wear my flip flops with this?”

She gasps at my request. “No! You can wear a pair of my boots. Guys love this look. Trust me. They’ll be mentally undressing you the second they see you.”

I try to stretch out the tank a little, feeling constricted by the spandex in the fabric, but it bounces right back. If I wanted to be uncomfortable I’d put a leotard on. “Don’t all guys picture chicks naked, though? I don’t think it matters what I have on.”

Cara snorts. “It matters, trust me. But they’d rather see your clothes on the floor and you in their bed.”

I pause and glare at her. “I’m not getting in anyone’s bed tonight, Cara.” I chance a peek at my reflection in the mirror and hardly recognize myself. I’ve never worn an outfit similar to this one. I’m so girly.

“Never say never. Let’s go.”

Dressed in Cara’s clothing and wearing some of her makeup, I tug on my skirt making sure I’m covered up. This version of Sophie that’s heading to her first party is the exact opposite of the one that walked into Johnson Hall a short forty five minutes ago. In true Sophie fashion, I start doubting my decision the closer we get to the party.

“Stop fidgeting, Sophie. You look seriously hot. I’d do you.”

“I never know what’s going to come out of your mouth next, Cara, but thank you.”

“I call’em like I see’em. Don’t worry, I’m not into girls. I like the cock too much.”

Shit. She’s exhausting.

Cara walks inside without knocking, not that they’d hear it over the music anyway. I should follow her, but I’m still debating turning around and walking home.

“Get in here, Sophie.”

“Okay. Jeez.” Here goes nothing.

Shuffling into the small kitchen, I’m immediately caught off guard when there’s a door being used as a table for beer pong. Being extra careful so we don’t spill any drinks, we side step the small crowd. Cara grabs two cups next to the keg and hands them to the guy manning the tap.