I’ve tried calling more than a dozen times since Wednesday with no luck. I texted my mom last night and she said everything was fine, Dad was just busy, but it still doesn’t feel right to me. He’s been on my ass about Skyler all semester, it doesn’t make sense that he would just ignore my calls now.

“Hey Dad,” I say loudly, trying to talk over the growing noise of excited Spring Breakers around me. I haven’t left a voicemail yet, and I can’t tell him what I need to like this, but I need to at least know I said something. “Listen, we need to talk. It’s about Skyler, about… everything. I’m getting on the cruise now, so I won’t have service again until Tuesday. I’ll call you then.” I pause, not sure what else to say. For some reason, I end with “Love you.” It’s weird, but for some reason it just felt right to say.

I tuck my phone in the pocket of my board shorts and catch up to Kade and the guys. I saw Skyler during our test yesterday morning, but that’s all after our study session Wednesday. I tried to hang out with her after the test, but of course the girls all wanted to go get their nails and shit done for the cruise. Looking around the crowd trying to spot her brown hair piled messily on her head, I feel like I might really be an addict. Can’t even go twenty-four hours, anymore.

“Bro, I’m so excited for this week,” Kade says as we reach the deck floor of the boat. We all pile out of the elevator and make our way to the main pool. It’s already littered with hundreds of college students, drink in hand and barely a stitch of clothing on. The sun is warm and it’s in the high seventies with literally not one cloud in the sky. Flicking on my Ray Bans, I realize we couldn’t have asked for a better week for Spring Break. It’s only March seventh, but in Florida and the Bahamas, spring is already starting. “We’re official brothers now, midterms are done, there are half-naked girls ready to drink their dignity away and I’ve got my dad’s credit card.” He winks at a blonde in a hot pink bathing suit with leopard bottoms, turning a little to face her as we walk by. “This is going to be the best week of my life.”

I laugh, clapping him on the back and shaking my head. “If you even remember any of it, that is.”

Kade goes to respond when suddenly we’re both tackled from behind. A pair of long, tanned legs wraps around my torso and long brown hair tumbles down in front of my face. Kade stumbles a bit as Cassie pulls herself up higher on his back, throwing her hands in the air. “It’s Spring Break, bitches!” Apparently that’s our theme for the week. “Where’s our shots?!”

I look up and find Skyler attached to the legs wrapped around me, but I didn’t have to look to know it was her. I think I’d know her legs if they were masked by a ski suit. She smiles down at me, her blue eyes sparkling in the sun. “I’ve been on this boat for seven and a half minutes now and I still don’t have a frozen, fruity drink in my hand.” She pouts.

“Well, that sounds like a problem I can solve.” I grab her thighs and pull her up higher on my back before taking off fast toward the deck bar. She squeals and squeezes her legs around me as I run, making flashbacks of her in my bed invade my thoughts. I drop her gently down onto a barstool and she laughs, swinging her hair over her shoulder.

“That might be my new favorite mode of transportation,” she says, eying me with a hunger in her eyes that I’ve grown too attached to. I feel myself instinctively leaning down to kiss her and stop short when I realize what I was about to do. Skyler bites her lip, her eyes catching my mistake. She smiles and I smile, too, because there’s nothing else we can do.

“Mine, too.”

We order our drinks along with the rest of the crew and then all gather around the pool, some kicking back in lounge chairs while others wade in the shallow end of the pool or hang their feet in. Skyler is sitting in a line on the edge of the pool with Erin, Cassie, Ashlei, and Jess. They all swing their feet absentmindedly and sip on their drinks, the condensation gathering and rolling down the glasses in the same way small beads of sweat slowly roll down Skyler’s neck and into the crevice between her breasts. The minute she took off the sundress covering her bathing suit I groaned internally, thankful for the sunglasses masking my reaction. But she made sure to do it nice and slow, smiling at me as she dropped the garment onto an empty lounge chair.

I can’t wait to get her alone.

When the captain announces we’re pulling away from port, everyone jumps out of the pool and starts gathering around the edges of the ship, waving to other boats and people dining at waterfront restaurants as we pull out to sea. With everyone distracted and buzzed at this point, I take advantage and grab Skyler’s wrist, tugging her with me in the opposite direction. I move quickly, making sure I avoid the areas where the Greeks from our school have gathered. Spying a private deck a bit higher than the one we’re on, I rush us up the stairs and we duck under a sign hanging on a chain that says VIP ONLY. When we reach the top, we’re alone. Ten empty lounge chairs shine in the sunlight, but no one is up here just yet. And, lucky for us, no one is patrolling the area yet, either.

“Finally,” she breathes, pulling me against her and sliding her hands into my hair as she presses her lips to mine. Her body moves against me like she can’t stand any sliver of space, like touching every part of me isn’t close enough. I wrap my arms around her and back her up to the railing, biting her lip softly and sliding my fingers under the strings of her bikini top before pulling back.

“I might upgrade to VIP if it means you’ll sneak up here with me every chance we get this week.”

She smiles, her long hair blowing wildly around her. “Oh yeah? You’d drop cash like that for me?”

“Depends.” I grin, turning her around to face the shore and wrapping my arms around her middle. Her skin is hot and smooth against mine, cool and rough in contrast. We’re polar opposites, it seems. Where she’s light, I’m dark. Where she’s innocent, I’m guilty. But then again, I can’t help but feel we’re exactly the same in so many ways. “What am I getting for my money? I’m a very strategic investor, Skyler Thorne.” I whisper the words on the skin right behind her ear and watch as tiny goose bumps spring to life and run rampant down the back of her neck.

She licks her lips and smiles, pressing her ass against my groin and leaning over the rail slightly as she waves to the people on the shore. I groan aloud this time, biting down on her neck softly as she inhales a stiff breath.

“I’m a risky investment,” she says, rolling her hips a little. “If you want the ultimate payout, you’re going to have to take the ultimate risk. You could double your money or you could end up losing everything you own.”

The feisty girl I met that first night at rush is back in full force and I fucking love it. For the past few weeks, things have been so strained between us. She was shy, then she was breaking me, then she was avoiding me, then we were friends, then I had her bent over my couch, and now we’re here, cruising to another part of the world together. My dad is still an issue and for her, Erin is just as much. We’ve both taken risks.

“That’s a risk I’m willing to take, if it means I might get you in the end.” The words fall out of my mouth faster than they process in my brain. It’s a serious statement, a stark contrast from the playful attitude we’ve had all week.

Skyler smiles, leaning her head back against my shoulder. “Be careful, Jackson. That almost sounded like you were falling for me.”

I swallow hard, tucking my hands a little tighter around her waist and resting my head on her shoulder. Her words float in the space around us and I don’t say anything else, letting them wash over me as I think of what they mean. What does it mean when you fall for someone? And when do you know if you’re just tripping or stumbling versus actually pummeling toward the cold hard ground? Love is a scary term, one I’m not sure I’m ready to say just yet. One I might never be able to use.