This?! Did we commit to each other at some point in the evening that I missed? Since when does one date equate to couple status?

“Friends. This is us being friends, Beckham,” I reply sternly, crossing my arms over my chest. “I like you. Don’t make me change my mind.”

He throws his head back with laughter as if I just told a hilarious joke. “You’re a funny girl, Hudson, and I like you too.” Glancing at my car, he lifts his eyebrows. “Wanna smoke before our next class?”

“Nah, I’m gonna head home early. My dad needs me to help out with a project, and we’re just watching a movie in Lit today.” Another half-lie, but now that I’ve said it aloud, it sounds like a great plan.

“Okay, my sweet friend,” he leans in and kisses my cheek, “I’ll see you on Wednesday then. Be safe driving home.”

As soon as he lumbers away, I hurriedly slide into the driver’s seat and start the car, exhaling a deep breath. I’ve never once skipped a class in my life, but I’ve never met a Crew and Caleb before either. And something tells me they’ll be way more fun to hang out with anyway.

“This is it. It’s absolutely perfect,” my mom announces while standing in the living room of the model apartment we’re touring.

We’ve visited no less than five different apartment and condominium complexes this afternoon, all of them having some issue or another until now. One didn’t offer washer and dryer hook-ups, another didn’t have ceiling fans, and there was even one without a dishwasher. Who in the fuck hand-washes their own dishes anymore?

“Yeah, I like it too,” I agree whole-heartedly, scanning the modern design of the open floor plan. “All of the bedrooms are situated together, which is great for Caleb, but gives us all more privacy than we’ve had lately.”

When we decided to make the move to Colorado, Mom put our house up on the market and, much to our surprise, we had a full-price offer in less than two weeks. Not wanting to spend a lot of money on rent or storing all of our furniture, we sold most everything in an estate sale and moved into a small, pre-furnished two-bedroom rental house, which the owner let us lease month-to-month knowing we were moving soon.

I love my brother like crazy, but after sharing a room with him for three months, I’m not going to pretend I’m not ready for a little bit of my own space back. We’ll be close enough to hear him, but have the ability to shut our own doors when we want to. Plus, I’m tired of having to go to the bathroom to jack off.

“Caleb, what do you think? The bedroom big enough for you?” I ask as I peer over at him.

“Huh?” His eyes are zoned in on the short skirt of the young leasing agent who’s bending over to demonstrate how the fireplace turns on. “Is what big enough for me?”

Rolling my eyes, I huff an exasperated breath. The kid has seriously become a walking, talking ball of testosterone in the last year. I mean, I get it. I remember exactly how it felt when it seemed like I couldn’t blow my load enough times in a day. A gust of wind blowing in the right direction was enough to get me hard. And even though things haven’t changed much in the last few years, I can at least focus on other shit now. Important shit, like where we’re going to live.

“The bedroom.” I thump him on the side of his head to break his trance. “Are you okay with the bedroom that’s going to be yours?”

“Uh, yeah, it’s great. Everything about this place is great.” He waggles his eyebrows.

Mom snorts and shakes her head, then turns her attention to the poor girl fighting with some lever. “You really don’t need to worry about that, honey. We’re going to take the place regardless of how nice the fireplace is. Can we fill out the paperwork now?”

An hour later, we are the proud lessees of unit number one-one-two at Pinehurst Village Apartments and our keys will be available to pick up late next week, which gives us just enough time after we fly home on Friday to pack up our cars with what stuff we still have and drive back out here…a thirteen hour road trip I’m not particularly looking forward to.

“So, Mom, when do you start your job?” I inquire once we’re back inside the late-model rental car, heading back to the resort. “Will you have a set schedule, or will it vary day-to-day?” She had returned from the interview with a glowing face and a skip in her step, and without even asking, I knew everything had gone well.

“I start the Monday before Thanksgiving,” she pauses to look both ways before pulling out onto the main road, “and after the first couple of weeks of training, I should work from seven to three, with Tuesdays and Wednesdays as my days off.”

“Okay, cool. At least I’ll know what availability to tell people when I start looking tomorrow. Did Luke mention any place I should begin with?”

Nodding, her mouth quirks up mischievously. “His friend runs a place called the Half Pipe Pub, supposedly a popular pub down on the mountain, and while I was there, he put in a call and got you a bartending job if you want it, but you don’t have to take it.”

“What?! Why didn’t you tell me?” I exclaim as a mixture of relief and annoyance washes over me. “I’ve been freaking out all afternoon about how we’re gonna make these high-ass rents if I couldn’t find something right away.”

“Crew, baby, I appreciate all of the responsibility you’ve taken on for this family since you graduated, but it shouldn’t be your place to stress over how we’re going to pay rent. I’m the parent here, and one way or another, I’ll figure it out. I’d do anything for you boys.”

She looks over her shoulder at Caleb in the backseat and winks at him then returns her focus forward. “You offering to stay home and homeschool him is more than enough for your contribution to the family. With the money we made on the house and what we saved this summer, we have enough to get us through five or six months. Not to mention, the pay at my new job is a substantial increase to what I was making before. We’re gonna be fine.”

Scrubbing my hands up and down my face, I groan. “That still doesn’t answer why you didn’t tell me, Mom. And of course I’m going to work; don’t be ridiculous. What kind of man would I be if I didn’t? That’s not how you raised me.”

“I asked him in case you made a big deal about working, which I figured you would,” she snips, “so I’ll call him when we get back and get the details about what you need to do. Now, at least you’ll know when you can start and what hours you can work, but once we get settled here and everything worked out with Caleb, I fully expect you to go back to school. You’re a smart kid, and you’re not going to spend your life making drinks for other people.”

I love her optimism—I envy it, honestly—but I’m afraid she’s setting herself and Caleb up for disappointment thinking he’s just going to miraculously get better. Lord knows, I pray for that to happen every single day, but until I see the improvement, I have to keep my expectations low. With each new doctor, and the endless combination of drugs over the last couple of years, I kept thinking one would work, but now I know better.

“I already told you I’d go back once everything settles down, but that’s not my main concern right now. You and Caleb. Our family. That’s it.”

She smiles sadly at me, reaching her right hand out and resting it on top of mine. “I love you and your loyalty, Crew baby, but you’re nineteen, and you deserve to live the life of a young adult—have fun, make friends, date…all that stuff. I appreciate everything you do more than you can ever know, but don’t lose yourself in the middle of all this. Okay?”

I nod half-heartedly, mostly because we just pulled up in front of our cabin and I don’t want to argue with her anymore. “Okay, Mom, but I’m taking that job. Tell me who I need to call or where I need to go and I’ll do it before we leave.”