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Unspeakable

Copyright ©2014 Michelle K. Pickett

All rights reserved.

ISBN 978-1-63422-019-4

Cover Design by: Marya Heiman

Typography by: Courtney Nuckels

Editing by: Cynthia Shepp

For Bre’Anna, Evan, Aleigha, and Alana.

You are loved.

For more information about our content disclosure,

please utilize the QR code above with your smart phone or visit us at

www.CleanTeenPublishing.com .

If you press me to say why I loved him,

I can say no more than because he was he, and I was I.

~Michel de Montaigne

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Epilogue

Playlist

A Note From Michelle

About the Author

Acknowledgements

Breathe. No one will break me. I’m strong. Breathe. Just breathe.

It wasn’t always that way. Him. Us. I knew people wondered. But it used to be different. It was sweet, loving, and everything a girl wanted from a boy. But he learned my secret and in that second, he wasn’t my wonderful, perfect boyfriend anymore.

He was my jailer.

I watched Jaden celebrate on the field with the rest of the football team. Another victory—the Cougars were on their way to another undefeated season. Jaden stuffed his blue-and-gold helmet under his arm and jogged across the football field. He swiped a bundle of red roses off the team’s bench as he passed. He’d had roses there for me the first time I ever went to watch him play.

I waited at the fifty-yard line after the game just as Jaden had asked. Sweat dripped off the ends of his dirty-blond hair and his cheeks were still flushed from running the last play, but he stood in front of me and butterflies swarmed in my belly. Bright, beautiful butterflies. Fluttering their multi-colored wings, tickling me on the inside.

“These are for you.” He held out ten magnificent, long-stemmed red roses tied in a shimmering, white ribbon. “Um, I made sure there were no thorns.” A small smile tipped the corners of his lips, giving me a tiny glimpse of his dimples.

I sucked in a breath. “They’re so pretty, Jaden, thank you.” I took the roses from him. Goose bumps ran up my spine like someone had tickled me with a feather, and my fingers trembled when I grazed them over the velvety petals. “But shouldn’t I be the one buying you something? You just won the game.” I peeked at him through my lashes.

Jaden shook his head slightly and wiped away the sweat on his forehead with his arm. “No. I had to buy something for my good-luck charm. Something beautiful for the most gorgeous girl here.”

I felt my cheeks warm and couldn’t help my nervous giggle when he slid a lock of hair behind my ear. Crossing one foot over the other, I brought the flowers to my nose. “Why ten?” I asked, my nose buried in the blooms. Ten seemed an unusual number, not that I minded.

“I read on the internet that red roses were for love, and ten meant you’re perfect.”

“Oh,” I breathed just before his lips descended on mine.

After that night, at the end of every game, he’d meet me at the fifty-yard line and give me ten long-stemmed red roses.

“Hey.” His voice brought my thoughts back to the present, and he leaned in for a kiss. “Some game, huh?” He pressed the flowers into my hand. A thorn bit into the soft flesh of my palm, and I winced.

“Yeah, you were great.” I knew that was what he really wanted to hear.

He gave me one of his swoon-worthy smiles before jogging toward the school. “I have to shower. Wait for me in the car,” he called over his shoulder before grabbing a scrawny kid by the arm. “Do you have money?” he asked him. He shook the kid’s arm to punctuate his question.

“Ye…yeah,” the kid answered.

“Good, buy her a Coke.” Jaden shoved the boy toward me, almost knocking him over.

Rushing forward, I outstretched my arms to catch the boy before he fell face-first in the mud. I frowned at Jaden’s retreating back. “Are you okay?” I asked the boy.

“Yeah. Here.” He shoved two wadded-up bills at me.

“No, no, you don’t have to buy me anything to drink. Don’t listen to him.” I shook my head, pushing the money away.

“Ha! Yes, I do. I don’t want him handing me my ass.” The boy’s eyes were wide as he shoved the money at me. It fluttered to the ground when he turned and jogged away. He acted like I had the bubonic plague. It was close. I dated Jaden.

I looked at the ground where the money had fallen. With a sigh, I knelt to pick it up just as a black boot landed on top of the two bills. I jerked my hand away and looked up into blue eyes so bright they seemed to glow in the darkness. The owner of the eyes squatted next to me.

“Yours?” the guy asked.

“No… I mean, not really…” I looked for the kid who gave it to me, but he’d already disappeared into the crowd. I sighed. “Yeah, I guess.”

His lips twitched into an amused grin. A lock of dark hair fell over his forehead. “Well, I’m glad we cleared that up.” He picked the money out of the mud, wiping it across the leg of his black jeans before he stood and handed the bills to me. “There you go.”

“Thanks. I’m Willow.”

“Brody. See you around, Willow.”

“Who’s that?” a voice boomed behind me, and I stumbled forward.

“Jeez, Karen, don’t sneak up on people like that.”

“I wasn’t sneaking. You were preoccupied staring at the Scooby snack.” She smiled and quirked a pierced eyebrow, colored black to match the black stripes in her long, blonde hair.

“No, I wasn’t.” I could feel the blush creeping over my cheeks and was glad we were standing in the shadows so she couldn’t see it.

“Whatever. Personally, I don’t give two shits if you look, but you’d better not let Jaden see you scoping out some random guy.”

“You’re seeing things. I wasn’t looking at anyone.” I stuffed the money into my pocket.