She leaned her head back against the headboard and sighed. “I know. I wish we could, though.”

“Me, too. Be a hell of a lot simpler.”

“It just…complicates things.”

“I know.”

We laid there in silence for awhile. I knew that I loved Lauren, but I wasn’t sure that was enough. It hadn’t been enough to keep us together when Elizabeth disappeared. If anything, I’d leaned on that too long, until it had nearly broken us. I didn’t want to jump back into things just because it was convenient. That wasn’t going to be good for anyone.

“I’ll take her to Minnesota,” Lauren said.

I turned to look at her. “Yeah?”

She nodded. “Yeah. She wants to go. I’ll go.” She looked at me. “It’ll give me and you some time, too. To figure out what’s best.” She paused. “It’s hard to think about things reasonably when we’re all here in the house together.”

“I can leave,” I offered.

She shook her head. “Not what I mean and I don’t want you to right now.” She turned and looked at me. “If I haven’t said it, I’m sorry. But I want you in this house right now. I don’t want you confused over that. I want you here. I just mean it’s hard to get perspective on everything when we’re all here. So if I go to Minnesota with her, maybe it’ll help clarify things. For both of us.”

“Okay,” I said.

She reached out and took my hand, folded it into hers. “I love you, Joe. I hope you know that.”

“I love you.”

“And thank you,” she said.

“For what?”

She scooted down on the bed and laid her head on my chest. “For not giving up. On Elizabeth.”

SIXTEEN

We talked a bit more before she drifted off and agreed that they would go the following day. We didn’t see the need to wait. Lauren had already cleared her schedule for the remainder of the week, I had airline miles for them to redeem and it didn’t allow for anyone to have second thoughts. Lauren said she’d contact the Corzines once they got to Minnesota.

She fell asleep and I extricated myself out from under her. I found my laptop, made the plane reservations for the next morning and booked a hotel for them, too. I paged through more unanswered emails, but felt no enthusiasm for responding to them. More people who were missing loved ones and it hurt to read through some of the words. They were no longer a distraction from being unable to find Elizabeth. Instead, they were a reminder of how hard it was to not be able to find someone you wanted to find.

And I found the same email from my friend Mr. Smith again. Same email address. Same words. Nothing different. But I didn’t like being fucked with. On the off chance that there was anything to the threats, I was glad the girls were going to head out of town.

I read the email one more time, then closed the computer and went to bed.

I slept in the room next to Elizabeth’s and I tossed and turned more than I slept, a combination of the anxiety over their trip and the knowledge that I’d have some time to myself to continue looking into what happened to Elizabeth. I hadn’t mentioned to Lauren that that was how I intended to spend my time, but I was certain she probably already knew.

When Elizabeth shuffled down the stairs in the morning, I was already at the kitchen table, sipping coffee and wondering if I could make it through the day without a nap.

“Hey,” I said.

She slid into the chair across from me, her hair tangled up, her shoulders slouched and grunted something in response.

“No run today,” I said.

She looked at me, disappointment on her face. “Can I go then? By myself? I don’t like to miss days.”

I shook my head. “You actually don’t have time. You’re going to Minnesota.”

“What?”

I explained to her what Lauren and I had decided the night before and on cue, Lauren emerged from the bedroom, already showered and dressed.

Elizabeth looked at her. “So we’re going this morning?”

She nodded, then looked at me. “If your dad got the flights booked.”

“I did,” I said. “Need to leave here in about an hour for the airport.”

Elizabeth looked down at the table and shuffled her bare feet against the floor.

“Is that alright?” Lauren asked, glancing first at her, then me. “Or do you not want to go now?”

“No, I do,” she said. “I just…I just wasn’t expecting to go today. So fast. But it’s fine.”

“Are you sure?” I asked. “We can delay it. We were just thinking that sooner rather than later was better and your mom is free to travel right now.”

“No, it’s fine,” Elizabeth said. “I’m just surprised.” She looked at each of us. “I guess I need to go pack then.” She hesitated. “And thank you.”

We both watched her go up the stairs.

“She didn’t seem thrilled,” Lauren said, taking Elizabeth’s seat.

I shrugged. “We surprised her. Probably wasn’t ready.”

“I’m not sure I am,” Lauren said.

“Not sure anyone is,” I said. “But if we wait around we might be waiting forever. This is her chance for her to close things up there and come back and get life started again. Here. With us.” I waved a hand over the table. “Close the door on Minnesota and moved forward.”

Lauren nodded. “I know. It’s just going to be weird.”

“You don’t have to let her do anything you aren’t comfortable with,” I said. “If she gets pissed, she gets pissed. We have to remember that we’re still her parents.”

“Do I let her meet with them?” Lauren said, lowering her voice. “Without me?”

“I’d say a neutral spot at first,” I said. “With you there. Restaurant, coffee shop, whatever. Let them know you aren’t totally comfortable being there, but we’re doing it for Elizabeth. I think that’ll help set the tone. After that, I’m sure she’s going to want to go to their house.” I paused, thinking. “She probably does need some time alone with them. So maybe you take her and you stay in the living room or something. They can talk in her room. I know that most likely they didn’t have anything to really do with her disappearance and they bought a bullshit story to adopt her. They were desperate for a child. They treated her well, as far as we know and that’s good. But we don’t want them getting comfortable with her or with us. Do what your gut tells you.” I paused again. “The one place I wouldn’t let her go alone is to a friend’s.”

“Why not?”

“Too many bad ideas could pop up,” I explained. “Running, hiding, whatever. So if she wants to see a friend or something, maybe you meet again at a restaurant or wherever. You can sit a table over or whatever. But I wouldn’t leave her alone for that.”

She nodded slowly, thinking over my words. “Okay.” She pursed her lips. “Maybe you should go, Joe.”

“Why?”

She ran a hand through her damp hair. “Because you know how to do all of this. I have no clue. But you seem to know what’s best. I don’t wanna screw it up.”

I reached across the table for her hand. Her skin was still warm from the shower. “It’ll be fine. There’s no right or wrong. Err on the side of caution. And like I said. I think you two need the time together.” I squeezed her hand. “If it’s bad or you don’t like it or whatever, then tell me and I’ll come. I’ll jump on a plane right then when you call. But I think it should be you first.”

She nodded again, but it didn’t seem very confident. “Alright. I need to put a few more things in a bag then.”

Half an hour later, we were all in the car on the way to the airport. The fog was heavy again, droplets of water riding on the windshield as we drove. No one spoke and even the radio couldn’t diminish the weight of the silence. I wondered what each of them was thinking about.

I pulled into the short-term parking lot and walked them into the terminal. It was late morning and the early morning travelers had already come and gone, leaving the airport quiet and uncrowded. I found the airline kiosk and printed off their boarding passes for them and walked them to the security line.