"I'm shocked a church elder even knows that word."

"Oh, you kids think you invented sex and atheism!"

"Not concurrently."

Charles is a large man with a barrel chest, and when he laughs he scares flocks of birds miles away.

"I assume sex and atheism aren't what you came here to talk about," I continued, when the sonic boom had died away.

"Just thought I'd drop in. Keeps me out of trouble and the missus doesn't get suspicious."

"Ah! I'm an alibi."

"Well, no. But I was over at the hardware store buying saddle soap and some liniment – "

I held up a hand. "I want you to stop and think about what you just said."

"What? I was at the hardware store."

"Saddle soap and liniment. You're such a farmer."

"Oh, big city boy! Do you want to hear my story or not?"

"I want to hear your story, Charles," I said, in my best humble voice.

"That's better. So I was at the hardware store and I heard from Paula that you'd said Sandra and Michael – at the bank?"

"Yes, I know who Sandra and Michael are."

"Well, you'd said they were an item and I wanted to know your sources."

"Is this going to be a lecture about telling tales out of school?" I asked.

"No, but Sandra's parents'll hear about it, and I thought I'd set you right, because Cassie is talking about them. But everyone else says that Nolan's sister says she never said she saw anyone kissing on the loading dock."

"Oh, I heard it was the safety-deposit vault."

"See? My point is, Nolan's sister doesn't like the way Sandra's treating him, so she might not have told the whole truth."

"Sandra and Nolan?" I asked, surprised.

"That's only what I hear."

"But I always thought he was..." I hesitated.

"Was what?"

"Well, you know. Closeted."

"Come again now?"

"I'm sure we young whippersnappers didn't invent homosexuality, Charles."

"Oh! Nolan, do you think?"

"It's only a personal opinion," I said hurriedly.

"He was in the Navy..." Charles looked thoughtful.

"Now that kind of thinking is why people say we're backwards out in the country," I said, shaking a finger at him.

He shrugged. "Anyway, Michael's not going to boast but he's probably not going to deny it if someone asks him, even if it isn't true. I'd be careful who I tell."

"I'm going to need a chart for this soon," I remarked.

"Well, make sure you take a poll on Nolan."

"Charles! I'm not going to poll Low Ferry about Nolan's sex life. You sure Nolan's sister isn't just embarrassed she told Cassie and Cassie told the whole world?"

"It's possible. You'll keep your ear to the ground, won't you?" he asked.

"Of course. I promise you'll be the first one I tell if I find out Cassie's lying."

"Then I'll check in when you know more," he said, putting his hat back on. "See you on Sunday?"

"See me sleeping in on Sunday."

"Heathen."

"Evangelist. Have a nice day!" I called after him as he left. I returned to the back room, and to my dilemma.

I was sure that plenty of people in Low Ferry would be interested in dirty books, but none of them would admit to it and certainly none of them would ever come to Dusk Books asking for it. There were three or four people in town I could mention them to, on the sly, but that kind of activity could give all kinds of wrong ideas. Besides, some bookstore out there, probably in Chicago, was looking for them.

I could call the supplier, but that would be an endless parade of "please hold" and "press four for more options". I could package them up and ship them back, but I didn't want to pay postage for someone else's mistake.

Or...I could call Marjorie. She knew everything. She'd know exactly who to talk to, and any excuse to call Marjorie was a good one, anyway.

"Eighth Rare Books, Marj speaking," she answered when I called. I heard the clacking of her pencil against her newspaper in the background.

"Marjorie, this is the exile," I said.

"Christopher!"

"Country mouse reporting in."

"Why do you break an old woman's heart, Christopher? I haven't heard from you in weeks," she said.