putting him on guard. He made the wolf within pace nervously back and forth within its mental cage. His

teeth felt sharper in his mouth, there was a hollow, almost painful, emptiness in the pit of his belly, and he

felt uncomfortably aroused. The heat in the room was stifling him and he knew he needed to get away

soon. Tonight. Drive into the mountains, let the wolf off its leash. It was time. He’d done a lot for Jolene

this past week, taken extra shifts, broken up a potentially bad fight; she’d understand if he needed to get

away early.

Kevin wasn’t usually so straightforward, but the wolf was growing, making him bolder, more aggressive.

He turned to the man with the ponytail and said, “Are you a narc?”

The man’s eyebrows jumped. He met Kevin’s eyes head on—a clear, focused hazel that seemed, for just a

moment, to lighten, then darken once more. A trick of the light, perhaps. “No. Just making conversation.

You look lonely, young man.”

“Well, I’m not,” Kevin said defensively, making a mental note to avoid the guy next time he showed up in

the club, maybe switch with Allison. Let Allison take care of him. She was bubbly, friendly, and vapid.

Thankfully, at that moment, a couple sat down at the far end of the bar. Kevin headed that way to take their

orders. Along the way, he smelled too much alcohol on Ron and decided to cut him off. By the time he’d

served the couple their drinks, Ponytail had gone.

Just as well. He picked up his phone and texted Allison about taking over his shift a little earlier than

usual. He told her he wasn’t feeling well, that he might be coming down with something. She texted him

back, telling him no problem, she was on her way. “A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do,” Ron was

slurring into his empty whiskey glass. “You get that, kid? There’s just a time for things, that’s all. A time

for everything under the sun…”

“Yeah, Ron, I get you,” Kevin said as he took Ron’s car keys and hung them on the pegboard behind the

bar. He understood Ron all too well even as a trickle of nervous energy crawled down his spine, tensing

his muscles. Ten minutes later, as Allison breezed in the door, he found himself sighing with relief. The

city was stifling him and he needed to get away. He needed to run before he completely lost control.

A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do, he thought as he loosened his bowtie and quickly headed into

the back. Unless, of course, you were not a man at all.

***

Chapter Two

As soon as Kevin got back to his flat he started packing an overnight bag. He threw things haphazardly

into the duffle, making an unholy mess of things. He knew he was going too fast, that he was too full of

adrenaline and excitement. He told himself to slow down. He didn’t want any accidents on the road.

“Going to the mountains?” his sister Hannah asked, stepping into his room. She was wearing a pajama top

and shorts, her long, dark blonde hair hanging in ribbons across her shoulders. She was twenty-two now,

majoring in law at CUNY. Kevin had practically raised her by himself, and he always felt a little guilty

about leaving her alone in the city.

“Yeah, sis,” he told her, trying to neaten the mess he’d made. “But I’ll have Burt look in while I’m gone.”

Burt was their super, who lived across the hall. He often looked in on Hannah when Kevin was at work.

Their building was a surprisingly tight-knit community, even for New York City.

Hannah plopped down on the bed beside his duffle and started arranging his clothes neatly. “Kev, I’m not

a fucking baby, you know. Besides, Matthew’s coming over this weekend to help me study, should I need

anyone to protect me.” She rolled her eyes dramatically at that.

“Good. Though I’m not so sure he’s a good influence on you, given your potty mouth of late.”

Hannah gave him a hard look—or as hard as she was capable of with her watery pale blue eyes fixed

somewhere other than his face. “Fuck you, big bro. I had a potty mouth long before Matthew. You know

that.”

For a moment, Kevin feared there would be an argument. Then they both burst into laughter. Kevin leaned

forward and kissed his sister’s forehead, shushing her long bangs out of the way. “I know, sis. But can’t

you just let your big brother worry about you?”

Hannah gave him a tight hug. “Only if you let me worry back. What do you do up there in the mountains? I

know it’s not fishing. You’re no good at that.”

“Hiking, sleeping…nothing that would interest you,” he lied.

She grinned mischievously. “I think it’s where you keep your porn stash, but whatever.” She hugged him

again and he tweaked her nose.

“I’ll be back by Sunday night. Don’t get in trouble, Hannah Banana.”

“That’s me—trouble-free.” She got up to leave the room, trailing her fingers across the wall to guide

herself. Hannah getting in trouble was highly unlikely, he knew. She had dreams of being a famous

attorney someday and was a serious study horse. She wanted to prove a person’s disability didn’t define

them. Besides, if Matthew was showing up, Hannah wasn’t going to be going anywhere. They’d been

dating for four years now and Matthew was fiercely protective of his girlfriend.

Ten minutes later, he was heading for the door, the duffle over one shoulder. “I’ll have my cell turned on

all weekend,” he called to Hannah. “And there’s beef stew in the fridge. You just need to heat it up

slow!”

“Got it!” she called back. “And I hate you!”

“Why?”

“You eat so much and never gain a pound!”

Kevin grinned. “Don’t burn it!”

“I won’t!”

“And don’t let Matthew eat it all!”

“Yes, Mom!”

Less than an hour later, he was well on his way up to the Poconos. It was a two hour drive on the back

roads, but serene and scenic once he got past Jersey City. It wasn’t long before he hit the mountains and

the road became steep and winding, the dense green pines and blue firs closing in on both sides of the

highway. He drove with the windows down even though it was hot and humid, almost the height of

summer, and his old secondhand Jeep did, in fact, have AC. He wanted to breathe in the piney, wild forest

air as the sun slowly sank beyond the mountains and he wended his way up to his boss’s cabin.

Jolene had won the place in her divorce settlement. She hated the country but had kept it out of spite. She

knew her ex loved it and was huge on hunting. Jolene had been lending it to Kevin for years, one of the

many reasons he liked his job at the Barracuda. It wasn’t much, little better than a hunting shack, but once

every two weeks or so, Kevin called it home for a weekend. It was private and tucked away, didn’t even

have electricity, just a generator in a shed in the back. Jolene rarely ever visited it, but she was happy to

lend it to Kevin because it kept the local troublemakers from ransacking the place for valuables like