Don’t look so surprised. Yeah, I sleep with strippers. Big deal.What do you expect me to do with them? Play pinochle?

See, the great thing about Candi and Jewel is that business never blurred into pleasure. They’d do their job, we’d have a drink after, and most times, they’d leave unsexed and well paid for their professional services.

This was not one of those times.

They did as I had asked, teaching the women their signature moves before dismissing them for the evening. Then they were at my door with a chilled bottle of Dom and twin wicked gleams burning in their eyes.

“You look tense,” Candi said, stepping inside. She eased my suit jacket from my shoulders and began to knead. Jewel popped the cork without spilling a single drop.

“I saw it too. You seem…different. Not as focused,” she chimed in.

“Frustrated,” Candi added.

Jewel returned to our sides with glasses of champagne. I downed mine in two gulps. “Shut up. And take off your clothes.”

There was no prelude required between us three. I didn’t even expect them to do their usual song and dance to get me hot. They know what turns me on just as I know how to get them off.

And that’s what I did.

There, in the middle of my living room, I bent Candi over the arm of the couch and took her from behind while finger-fucking Jewel. Candi came quick, like always. Just a stroke of her clit while giving it to her deep and fast, and she shattered beneath me in minutes. Jewel wanted to play. She straddled my lap, my latex-sheathed dick still glistening with Candi’s sugary wetness, and mounted me. She moaned loudly, feeling her hypersensitive mound creating friction against my pubic bone. Candi sucked her friend’s bouncing tits and played with her ass until I felt her insides tighten and shiver. Then she was screaming, crying my name so loudly I had to cover her mouth with one hand, while I wrapped the other around her waist and bounced her hard, up and down on me, prolonging her orgasm.

When her cries quieted to whines, she dismounted and pulled off the condom. Then she and Candi took turns sucking me off, moaning against my dick, as they tasted themselves in the trickles that had slid down to my balls.

And that was it. No romance. No cuddling. Not even any flirty conversation. Just direct, to-the-point sex. We shared a laugh when Candi accidently put on Jewel’s panties in her hazy afterglow. We made plans for next season’s session. Then they were gone. Just like everyone else in the revolving door of my life.

And now…now I’m conflicted about it. Like I’ve been unfaithful or disloyal to someone. But to who? Myself? Shit, if anything, I’m pretty damn pleased with myself. And feel a helluva lot better physically. Yet, something deep inside me aches with regret. I can feel the loneliness closing in, squeezing my chest. I pant and wheeze with every stroke, but I don’t stop. I don’t give in to the water. I won’t let it defeat me.

“YOU’RE WET.”

I keep my eyes to the sky. “Yeah.”

“But it’s chilly out here. You have to be freezing.”

“I’m fine.” For the most part, I am. I’ve gotten used to swimming long after sundown, since many of the women like to sunbathe during the day. Plus, I’m too damn frustrated to feel anything else.

I hear the shuffling of Allison’s sandals moving closer to me. And before I can lift my head to see what she’s doing, she lays a sweater over my damp body. Her scent surrounds me, digging its way into my skin and hair… into me.She’s not only affecting me, she’s infecting me.

I want to brush off her sweater, but I know it’d hurt her feelings. She’s been rejected enough, and she doesn’t need me pouring salt in the wound. And it’s not her fault that I’m one rub-and-tug away from being downright infatuated with her.

“You left early today,” she says, sitting in the lounger beside mine.

“Had to take care of something.” I still don’t look at her. I don’t even thank her for the sweater. So damn conflicted by my feelings for her. Yet, so frustrated with myself for harboring this sickness—this affliction—that forces me to be a somewhat decent human being and do the right thing. I don’t want to hurt her, but I know I will eventually. There is no other option.

“Interesting class today.”

“Yeah.”

I feel her turn towards me. “Are you ok?”

“Yeah.”

“Did I…did I do something wrong?”

“No.”

“You just seem…” Distant. Cold. Exactly what I should have been all along.

“A lot on my mind.” That’s a lie. Now that I don’t have any baby batter on the brain, my head is completely clear, and I can think somewhat rationally again. I can see how much of a mistake it is for us to carry on like this. She’ll get attached. I’ll let her. And then she’ll go back to her husband. And where will that leave me?

“Wanna talk about it?”

“No.”

“Ok.”

It’s quiet for a while, and I mentally prepare for her to get up and leave. When she shuffles to her feet, I close my eyes to cushion the blow of abandonment. Then I hear a loud splash into the water, causing my eyes to pop open. I’m on my feet before I can even register what’s happened.

“Holy shit, it’s cold!” Allison exclaims, teeth chattering. Her hair is soaked, sticking to her face and neck, and her dress is completely immersed in water. This upper-crust princess who’s probably never even worn the same garment twice, has just jumped in the pool fully clothed. She smiles up at me as she wades toward the edge.

“Are you insane? It’s cold out here! You’ll get sick!” I say, waving my hands animatedly.

“Says the guy in dripping wet shorts and nothing else.”

“Seriously, Ally. You’ll catch a cold. It’s my job to keep you all safe and comfortable, and right now, you can’t possibly be either. Please don’t make it impossible to do my job.”

She rolls her eyes and splashes water in my direction. “Fine, fine. Spread on the guilt like mustard. I see how it is.” She wades to the ladder where I wait for her, arm outstretched, prepared to pull her into my arms – ahem, I mean, pull her out of the pool. Yeah, yeah, that’s right.

“Give me your hand,” I demand brusquely, irritated at her immaturity. A day ago, her playfulness was endearing. Now it’s just a hassle.

She does as I say, those big, doe eyes locked onto mine, and goes to take a step on the ladder, steadying her assent with her hand in mine. And just as I think she’s pulling herself up onto dry land, she pulls back. Hard. Harder than a little thing like her possibly should. Before our bodies collide, she jumps back to her right, giggling hysterically.

Of course, all this is going down as I lose my footing at the edge of the pool and plummet, quite ungracefully, into the chilly water. I can still hear her laughing as my face and chest crack the surface with a splash.

“Are you crazy?” I shout, sputtering a mouthful of chlorine.

“Yes!” she croaks between chuckles.

“Oh, you think you’re funny, don’t you?” I ask, dropping my voice an octave. I can feel my face heating.

“Yes!” She’s still laughing, still oblivious to my murderous expression.

I move towards her. “You think you’re going to get away with this shit, too, huh?” That catches her attention, and her eyes widen, the orbs looking more blue than green against the backdrop of the pool.

“It was just a joke. I’m sorry if I-” she stammers.

Closer now. Only a few feet separating me from her small, fragile body. “Just a joke. You think you’re so fucking funny. You think you can just do whatever the hell you want.”

“No, no, I don’t,” she says, shaking her head. She goes to move toward the ladder, but I block her advances with my body.

“You just do whatever you want, to whomever you want without consequence. Don’t you, Allison? You have no regard for anyone else. The world revolves around you, doesn’t it?”