“What will I do?” He sounded in pain. “I can’t lose you.”

“Stop thinking that way. I can’t fight them if you’re not on board, Kai.”

He looked at me, his forehead creased. I knew he was feeling selfish, wanting to keep me and keep our bubble of joy as long as we could, knowing it couldn’t last. I knew he wanted to support me, and that he would when it came down to it. But right now he couldn’t own it.

I tugged his face to mine and spoke against his lips. “You haven’t lost me, Kai. I’m right here with you. Hold me.”

He buried his face in my neck and did just as I asked, pulling me close and not letting go.

That night we cuddled in the backseat under a blanket—Kai leaning against the door and my back against his chest. His arms moved around my waist and I linked our fingers. The other cars eventually left. We stared out at the stars for a long time, both lost in thought.

I whispered, “The first time I came to Lookout Point—”

His fingers tightened around mine, almost painfully.

“Not with a guy!” I clarified, wanting to laugh as his grip loosened. “It was the day I got the postcard from you after the summit.” Again I felt his whole body tense, maybe with guilt about how things had played out back then. I kept going. “I knew I had to let you go, and I knew there was something bigger coming.” I turned, angling myself enough to look into his haunted eyes. “I never thought we’d get this time together. We’re so lucky.”

I unclasped one of our hands so I could reach up and stroke his face. He closed his eyes, the troubled tension never leaving his features.

“Kaidan, if anything happens to me—”

His eyes flew open and he yanked me closer. “Don’t. Don’t you dare finish that sentence. Nothing is going to happen to you.”

I swallowed hard. We both knew that might not be the case.

His eyes seemed to burn in the reflected moonlight, impassioned.

“If we both, you know, end up down there . . .” I cleared my throat. “In hell. We can make it through together. We’ll keep each other strong until it’s time for our judgment.”

He said nothing, and from the corner of my eye I saw his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed.

“I’ll never leave your side,” he whispered. “I swear it.”

I sighed, and snuggled down against his chest. In his arms I felt secure and stronger as the threads of our love twined together like a sturdy rope for us to hold tight to.

May we never let go.

A shift of the light woke me hours later and I opened my eyes to the rays of a pink-tinged sunrise. We were scrunched in the seat, half sitting, half lying. My heart softened at the sight of Kaidan’s sweet sleeping face with long waves of hair lying against his skin. He appeared gentle and innocent. At peace.

We must have both been exhausted last night. I couldn’t recall falling asleep, but now a spike of fear pierced me at the thought of being seen together like this. I hated to wake Kai, but when I tried to sit up he sucked in a ragged breath and jolted upward, pulling me to his chest and searching around us.

“It’s okay,” I said.

He let out the breath and leaned back.

“We shouldn’t have slept like that last night,” I said, reaching into my purse for a mint.

“Yeah.” He cracked his neck, which probably had a kink from how he’d slept. “Not our best idea.”

“They could have caught us.” What were we thinking? Whisperers were out hunting for me, and we fell asleep snuggling in public? How stupid!

Kaidan’s face hardened and he stared out of the window, giving a shrug. I narrowed my eyes at him.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I mimicked his shrug.

“You’re intent on being turned in anyhow.”

“Yes, but on our terms. And I’m the only one getting turned in, not you. They have to trust you.”

He continued to stare out at the great expanse past the cliff’s edge. I knew he didn’t like the idea of me being in danger “alone,” and he hated pretending to be against me, but he was more valuable as an ally if Pharzuph trusted him.

I reached for his knee, needing to comfort him and make him see the importance of his role, but he shifted and my hand landed inside his thigh. I pulled away, but it was too late. His red badge expanded then snapped back to its normal size and began to throb. His head lowered and his blazing blue eyes rose to mine.

“Maybe we should take a break from talking,” he said in a low voice.

The breath I’d been inhaling got stuck.

Bad, bad, dangerous boy.

“We can’t.” I tried to sound strong, but then he licked his bottom lip and flicked his hair aside, and a burst of citrusy pheromones filled the car. My eyes fluttered a little, and I cursed my weakness for him. “Kai, don’t. We seriously can’t be caught in any compromising . . . you know . . .”

“Positions?” He sported a devilish half grin.

Yeah. That.

His hot hand reached for my hip, but I pushed the car door open and jumped out. The air was warm outside and already muggy, but when I felt him come up behind me I shivered with desire. I spun to face him, stepping back.

He looked half amused and half lusty as he lifted his palms in question. “You’re running from me?”

Glad he could find humor in it.

“If you keep being all hot like that, then yes. It’s not safe.”

“To be hot?”

“To do it.” I crossed my arms.

Kaidan’s lips quirked upward. “Do what?”

“Be serious, Kai.”

He stepped toward me again and I stepped farther back, running into his rental car.

“No more sex,” I said in a rush.

A look of astonishment crossed his face.

“Just until after the summit,” I added quickly.

All amusement vanished at the mention of the summit. Kaidan’s face once again turned hard as he stared at me.

“Kaidan . . . ,” I whispered.

He continued to stare, the mask in place to hide all emotions from me. I hated that mask. I wanted to yank it off and throw it over the cliff. I went to him and placed my hands on his shoulders. He made no move to touch me back. I lowered my hands down his arms and took his hands. When I spoke, I kept my tone gentle, but firm.

“You have to pretend not to like me. It sucks, but it’s the smartest plan. If we’re both going to survive this, which I really think we can, and will, this is our best bet. You’re better at hiding your feelings than I am, but at this point it doesn’t matter if they think I have feelings for you. You can even say you made me fall for you to lure me in. Your father trusts you to find me and get me to the summit on your own. That’s huge. He has to think you’re in his pocket until the very last minute. We’ll have freedom to communicate with each other and warn the others. Do you really want to jeopardize one of the only things we have going for us?”

He closed his eyes and squeezed my hands. When he opened his eyes the mask slipped away.

“No, I don’t. I’m sorry,” he said. “I’ll do whatever I have to do. Or not do.”

I let out a relieved breath, trying to push back the waves of emotion. “Thank you. So, from here on out, no kissing, no holding hands or touching until this is all over. No doing anything that could be suspicious.”

He nodded, lips pursed, and let my hands go. I felt an immediate loss. I missed him already.

UNCORRECTED E-PROOF—NOT FOR SALE

HarperCollins Publishers

..................................................................

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

PRISONER

Kai and I went our separate ways that morning so I could hide while he took care of the estate business. I didn’t want to go anywhere too populated where whisperers might be, so I drove around winding back roads, passing farms. When I stopped for gas I went into a nearby drugstore for a drink, tape, glue, and a large bag of candies.