She scrambled around her brain for a figure and blurted out, “Fifty dollars.”

Sold. It was a date.

And then she thought—what was she going to do for a bunch of little kids? And how was she going to get there? She didn’t have a car or even a driver’s license.

Roger—he said she could call him that—finally got a few minutes with her after most of her public had gone out the door. “That was good,” he said. “Gooder—better than good.” He was still a little dazed and having to adjust. “What are you doing next weekend?”

He offered her half an hour on Saturday and half an hour on Sunday. She took it.

And she could walk to McCaffee’s. It only took about twenty minutes from the halfway house.

Mia, Darci, Rhea, Micah, and Sally gathered around her at the house and had a little celebration with apple juice and Oreo cookies. They were all blown away and just couldn’t believe what they’d seen, and all of them voiced the same sentiment: Eloise Kramer would not be a “hobo” for long.

Of course, the question came up as it always did, and probably should if she was doing things well: “How did you do that?” And she just shrugged teasingly and said it was a trick.

And now, sitting by herself in her room and thanking God for a great evening, she faced that question once again: Howdid I do that?

chapter

15

SATURDAY AND SUNDAY NIGHT

October 16 & 17

7–7:30 P.M.

Enjoy the incredible

ELOISE “The Hobett” KRAMER

Magician Extraordinaire

Astounding.

Astoundingly Funny.

Bring the Family.

You won’t believe your eyes!

Now the poster was larger, done with poster paints, featured a digitally printed, taped-on, color photo of Hobett doing the Rainbow Bridge—her name for her new card routine— andit appeared in the front window on Monday. Roger was becoming a believer and Eloise was becoming a performer, which turned out to be good news and, well, challenging news.

Okay, great, I get to perform, but … what? I need new stuff!

With the kind and loving indulgence of Mia at the thrift store and Sally Durham’s offer to drive her until she could get a license, she went to work full-time on new material, anything she could think of, starting with what in the world to do for a kid’s birthday party.

There were twelve kids, ages six to eight, sitting all over that living room as if they’d been thrown in there, party hats on their heads, cake crumbs and ice cream on their faces, laughing like adults breathing helium.

The spinning quarters worked great because they were so magical and the room was small. Burt and Baxter not only bounced among the kids, driving them wild as the kids tried to grab them, they also sat on a little table up front through the rest of Eloise’s act, upstaging her at key moments.

Card tricks? Too slow for this bunch.She opted for an old standby, balloons, and made balloon doggies, giraffes, dinosaurs, and anything else she’d learned from books and videos just that week. Of course, a balloon let loose in the room and guided to zip right by the kids’ heads—and bonk Eloise right between the eyes—kept things lively, and with just the right kind of attention she could make some of the balloon creatures move.

October 16, at 7:00 P.M., McCaffee’s was full and folks must have heard about the spinning quarters; they seemed a whole lot more attentive, even moving in closer to see for themselves what their friends were so gaga about.

October 17, at 7:00 P.M., a whole new set of folks came through the door, which was cool; Eloise could do all the same stuff, which meant she could get better at it.

Of course, every gig led to more gigs, and Sally Durham, a real saint, continued as Eloise’s chauffeur, taking her to every one.

Gerry Morris’s eleventh-birthday party: these kids, mostly boys, were tougher to please, and the goofier she got the less they bought it, so she eased back on the goofy and played mostly herself. They loved the quarter pulled from her nose—apparently they were into snot and boogers and such. Eloise discovered she could stretch a balloon’s neck and make it hum “Happy Birthday.” If she’d played it on her armpit that would have gone over just as big. A creative milestone.

Melinda Flowers’s ninth birthday was just-us-girls, and Eloise loved it. She ventured boldly into new territory for this one: she reddened her cheeks instead of her nose, left off the whiskers, and came as a semiclownish girl in a fluffy white blouse with a red scarf, black shorts with loud, flowery suspenders, and red-and-white-striped knee highs. It was her first performance working under her own name and her first time working with flowers, making them appear in her hand, in little girls’ hands, and best of all, in little girls’ hair. Boys wouldn’t have cared for that trick, but everygirl had to get a flower. She could have filled the whole time just doing that.

THIS WEEKEND!!!

FRIDAY, SATURDAY, AND SUNDAY NIGHTS!!!

7:00 P.M.

McCaffee’s Proudly Presents

the Incredible

ELOISE KRAMER

Magician Extraordinaire

Astounding.

Astoundingly funny.

Bring the Family.

You won’t believe your eyes!

Wow, check out the poster printed by a computer graphics geek whom Roger knew, with a full-color studio photo of Eloise striking a pose and tipping her hat!

At seven, and not from seven to seven-thirty? Well, Roger had come to the point where McCaffee’s was “proudly presenting” her, and the half-hour rule had loosened to a guideline with only one qualifier: “Don’t wear ’em out.”

No dates? Roger was assuming, not really saying up front, just kind of hinting that she’d be doing her show at McCaffee’s every weekend, you know, if it worked out, if she was up to it. You know.

What happened to the “Hobett”? Well, sometimes she was the Hobett, sometimes she wasn’t. Sometimes it was funnier to play it mute, sometimes it was better to yak it up a little.

And the exclamation marks!!! To think that Roger actually used them!!! He wasn’t that excitable a guy!!!

Friday night the place was packed. Saturday night Roger had to ask people to come back for a second show, at eight-thirty. Sunday night, a family reunion filled the place at seven and Eloise had to do a second show again. By the end of the weekend she was exhausted …

To the tune of $1,785.25.

Jacquie Palmer’s sixteenth birthday was like a whole new thing and like, Eloise was like, Hey, I’m like almost on the same leveland she wore like, regular clothes instead of doing the hobo and some of her accessories were like, from the mall and not the thrift store.

Oh, and now she was charging like $100 and it was like the moms and dads didn’t even mind.

Far out.

She did her seven-o’clock show at McCaffee’s on October 30, then dashed up the street to do the Elks’ Halloween Bash—now, that hadto be delusional—but the $1,000 check was real enough.

Halloween Night at McCaffee’s? Roger tried to wring every possible use out of the holiday, decorating the place and dressing up like … well, a chef all in white with a big paste-on mustache, a pillow on his stomach, and an arrow through his head. Whatever. Abby dressed up like Julia Child but nobody got it. Megan and Myron dressed up like each other. The place was filled with all sorts of weird-looking people. Eloise didn’t go in for spooks or sorcerers; she just kept it fun, from this planet.