“You mean, anyone who wasn’t Ven.”

Garrett gave her a frank look. “That’s right. Once burned, twice shy, I guess. I can workwith men, fine. But talk? Reallytalk? That’s another kettle of fish.”

Stern shrugged. “I don’t doubt that you work with men just fine. I’ve heard no complaints. Actually, the crew respects you, a lot. We’ll get to the crew in a sec. Go on.”

“There’s nothing more to say. I miss Nigel, and it’s my fault things worked out the way they did. He’s dead because I made a command decision. I feel like I killed a friend, Jo, and I have to live with that.”

“Okay,” said Stern, nodding. “Okay. But there’s no reason that Halakhas to live with it. The poor guy didn’t do anything but show up, you know? You want to keep beating up on yourself, go right ahead. I wouldn’t recommend it, but be my guest. But don’t take it out on Halak. He’s got enough problems.”

“All right, Doc.” Garrett exhaled. “Point taken. Now what’s this about the crew?”

Stern gave her a searching look, as if weighing whether to drop it and go on, or pursue what they’d been talking about. “A couple of things,” she said, evidently deciding on the former. “Just want to put a bug in your ear, that’s all. I did morning sick call. It was packed. An awful lot of somatic complaints. You know the drill: fatigue, upset stomachs. Headaches.” She eyed Garrett.

Garrett ignored the inference. “And?”

“Crew’s pretty shook up. They want to point fingers. Understandable.”

“Anyone in particular?”

“More shook up than anyone else? Yeah. Castillo.” Sighing, Stern threw her hands up in a what-can-you-dogesture. “I don’t know, Rachel. Like I said, maybe it’s good we’ve got a psychiatrist aboard this time around.”

Garrett’s concern was immediate. Castillo was young, she reflected, and he had all the qualities youth possessed: enthusiasm, energy, passion. He was also loyal, and stubborn to a fault.

But she should have known that, no matter what face Castillo showed her every day, he would feel Batra’s loss as keenly as Halak. Batra and Castillo had been an item for several months, and then Halak had shown up, and that was that. Garrett knew what everyone knew. Castillo and Batra were still friends, but on a ship—even one with over 700 souls aboard—privacy was hard to come by, and there had been a few times on the bridge when Garrett sensed the tension between Castillo and Halak. (And now, in light of what Stern had said, Garrett wondered if she hadn’t helped that along.)

“He’s thatbad?” asked Garrett.

“Let’s just say that he wouldn’t mind if Halak went somewhere far away and never came back,” said Stern.

“He toldyou this?”

Stern hiked one shoulder. “In not so many words. He talks. I listen. Right now, I’m not inclined to do anything more, but I might.”

“Order him to see Tyvan? For what it’s worth, whatever he’s going through hasn’t affected his work. I haven’t picked up on anything other than what you’d expect.”

“Of course not. You’re the captain. Castillo practically worships the ground you walk on, for crying out loud. You think he’s going to let you see anything? Anyway, I said I mightsend him to Tyvan. Depends on how things shake out. Actually, I’m hoping he goes on his own. Be good for him to come to that realization instead of being ordered.”

“You think this is going to be trouble when Halak returns to duty.”

“Yeah,” said Stern, and paused. Then: “Ifhe returns to duty.”

Garrett’s eyebrows shot for her hairline. “If?He’s hurt that badly?”

“Oh, no, it’s not that. His arm’s much better. He can use it without a lot of difficulty. His side, too, though that cut was pretty damn deep. Three more centimeters to the right, and that knife would have gone into his kidney. He bled like stink. That’s why he finally passed out. I had to give him a couple of transfusions just to get his blood pressure off the floor. Amazing, he managed to stay conscious long enough to pilot that shuttle. Chalk it up as one more mystery.”

“Mystery.” Garrett gave Stern a narrow look. “Referring to?”

“Well, that Ryn business for one.”

“Old news, Jo. He was cleared and reassigned.” Privately, the fact that Halak hadtransferred always bothered Garrett. She knew it was unfair to judge Halak by that fact (You’ve been judging him all along. It’s no wonder he’s in this mess.)but if she’d been in command of the Barker,she might have done the same thing: request that Halak be reassigned. On the other hand, if Halak had been a good first officer, she’d have fought for him to stay, or tried talking him out of it.

(And if he’d been Nigel…)

Shut up,she told the voice, just shut up.

“And a couple of the Barker’s crew ended up dead, too,” Stern was saying. “Anyway, for what it’s worth, Tyvan’s done an evaluation. Halak might have opened up with him. If not, then Tyvan will have something to say about that, too.”

“Mmmm.” Garrett reserved judgment on Dr. Yuriel Tyvan. She didn’t know the El-Aurian psychiatrist well. To be honest, she’d deliberately avoided him ever since he’d come aboard during a stopover at Starbase 5. “I’m not sure that Halak will feel he can talk very freely with a psychiatrist who’s doing a return-to-duty eval.”

“Your paranoia’s showing.”

“Come on, Jo. This is Starfleet. In the good old days, they used to board people out of the military for psychological reasons. Frankly, I don’t see how a psychiatrist can serve two masters: Starfleet andthe patient. You doctors have a lot of power…don’t make faces. You know I’m right. Relieving people from duty, making recommendations on retention, or return to duty…things haven’t changed that much. I’m not sure I blame Halak; Iwouldn’t feel free to spill my guts to a psychiatrist who I know is going to turn around and talk about what I just said with everybody else.”

“I don’t think Tyvan’s like that. Anyway, the idea’s worth a try. We both know what deep space can do to people.”

“I don’t remember that the early starships had any need for a psychiatrist.”

“Couldn’t prove that by Mac,” said Stern. “He’s got more than a couple of stories about crazy crewmen.”

It took Garrett a moment to place the reference. “Mac. You mean Leonard McCoy? Have you talked to him about Tyvan?”

“Yup. Mac and I go back a ways, you know that. Anyway, I called his office back at Starfleet Medical right before we picked up Tyvan. Know what he said? The scuttlebutt’s that Starfleet’s thinking about posting families together for deep space exploration.”

“Kids on a starship? Families? I don’t believe it.”

“I don’t make up the news. I just report it. It’s just a rumor, but the way Mac was talking? I think Tyvan’s an experiment. You put families aboard a ship, maybe there won’t be so many divorces, separations. People will be happier….”

Something must have changed in Garrett’s face because Stern stopped and looked chagrined. “Sorry, Rachel. I have a big mouth.”

Garrett shook her head and retrieved her coffee. The mug was cold; a chalky scum oiled the surface. But she held onto the mug just to have something to do with her hands. “Don’t worry about it, Jo. I’m past the divorce. Really. Now, what do you want to tell me about Halak? What did you mean ifhe returns to duty?”

Stern looked as if she wanted to say something else but changed her mind. “Okay. It’s this: Do you understand, and I mean precisely,what Halak was doing on Farius Prime to begin with?”

Garrett frowned. “No. What someone does on R and R is his business. He said he was visiting an old family friend. That’s his right. Farius Prime isn’t proscribed, so he didn’t break any regulations by going. But you do have to question his judgment about taking Batra along.”

“No.” Stern screwed up her face in a frown of disagreement. “That was an accident, Rachel. Batra was a grown woman who made a choice. A bad one, as it turned out. You can’t blame Halak for that. What you canblame him for is his not being exactly helpful about filling in the gaps and the discrepancies.”