careful, Callie.”

I nod, even though I’m not sure if he means to be careful for

Kayden or myself. He releases my sleeve and I weave around the

tables, tucking my elbows in. Kayden is putting his wallet into his

back pocket when I reach him and the plastic bag is hooked over

his hand. His jaw tenses as he grabs some napkins from the

metallic dispenser near the register without looking up at me.

“Hi,” I say, and again I’m frustrated with myself for such a silly

start.

“Hey,” he mutters, shoving the napkins into the sack.

“I just… I just wanted to come over and see how you’re

doing.” I take a breath because I’m nervous and forgetting to

breathe.

His eyes rise up to me and I’m taken back at the coldness in

them. “I’m fine.”

“That’s good.” My throat is shrinking, reducing airflow, and I

don’t know how to react. He starts to head for the door and I

follow him. “Kayden, wait.”

He doesn’t, pressing his hand to the door and shoving it

open. I know I should back off, but I can’t convince my feet to stop

moving. I hurry out the door after him, wrapping my arms around

myself as the wind hits my bare arms.

“Maybe we could talk?” I suggest as he opens the door to his

mother’s black Mercedes.

He pauses, shaking his head, and then he looks over the roof

at me. “Callie, I have to go. I’ve got stuff to do today.”

I walk through the slush and the puddles and around the

back of his car, not ready to give up. “You’re staying at your

house?”

He tosses the bag of food across the center console and

onto the passenger seat. “Yeah, where else would I go?”

The water is seeping through my shoes and it’s cold. “You

could come stay with me.”

His eyes focus on me. “And what? You’re mother’s just going

to welcome me there?”

I hesitate and it’s the wrong thing to do, but I can’t think of

anything to say. “I don’t care about my mother.”

He shakes his head and ducks over to climb into the car.

“Callie, I can’t stay at your house, not after everything that’s

happened.”

Why does it feel like he’s not referring to my mother

anymore but to our relationship? “Please don’t run away,” I sputter.

I’m no longer thinking rationally. I run around the front of the car

and open the door to the passenger side, prepared to make him

feel better. Somehow. I just need to find out how. The inside of the

car smells like him and I breathe in the scent as I move the food

bag out of the way, climb in, and close the door. “I don’t want you

going back there.”

Shaking his head, he slams the door and adjusts the seat

back, giving himself more room. He meets my eyes and there’s a

hollowness in them. “Callie, I never really left there. Just escaped

for a little while.” He turns the key in the ignition and the engine

roars to life. “My father isn’t there anymore.”

I shake my head. “Where is he?”

He shrugs, biting his lip, staring out the window at the

surplus warehouse next door. “On a business trip I guess.”

I want to ask him—want to know if he had any part of it.

“Kayden, did he—”

“Look, Callie,” he cuts me off and his gaze slices into me. “I

have to go. I got shit to do.”

I swallow hard and my insides tremble. “Please talk to me,” I

whisper, sucking back the tears.

He inhales through his nose and his solid chest puffs out and

then descends as he releases the breath. His hand is turning pallid

as he clutches onto the steering wheel and I swear I can hear his

heart beating. “I…” His breathing quickens as he struggles to

speak.

I prop my elbow on the console and place my hand on his

cheek. He flinches but stays motionless, looking at me. My heart is

racing passionately and pumping adrenaline through my body. I

don’t know what I’m doing or if it’s wrong or right. All I can do is

hope I’ll get to him. “You know you can tell me anything, right? I’ll understand.” He swallows hard as I brush a shaky finger under his

cheek. He still looks like he hasn’t shaved. His skin is rough under

my touch. “Please.”

He shakes his head. “I-I can’t.”

“Yes, yes, you can.” I lean over the console, needing to get

close to him. “I’ll help you.” Like you helped me.

His warm breath feathers against my cheeks and his

breathing quickens as his gaze flicks to my lips. “Callie, I…” He

drifts toward me and then his mouth crushes urgently against

mine. I instantly part my lips and allow his tongue to slip inside as I release a pent-up breath. I’ve missed this—him—more than I let

myself admit. I need him. So much.

I grip the front of his shirt as he cups the back of my neck,

pulling me closer, kissing me and exploring my mouth with his

tongue in rough, almost desperate movements. His other hand

moves around and frantically grabs at my hip. The console is

jabbing into my stomach but I don’t care. I just want to keep

kissing him forever. I never want to let him go or have him let me

go. I need him.

But then he’s pulling away, breathing profusely, with his jaw

clenched shut. When he looks at me, his eyes are cold. “You need

to go… I’m sorry, Callie.” He looks like he might cry. “I can’t be with you.”

I try to tell myself that it’s because he’s hurting but suddenly

I’m back in high school, back to being no one, back to being the

invisible girl filled with shame.

“Freak,” Daisy said as I walk down the hall with my head

hung low. “Nobody wants you around.”

I hurried down the hall, clutching my books as I ran outside. I

kept running and running until I was safely underneath the

bleachers near the football field where no one could see me. I

shoved my finger down my throat and forced my lunch out of my

stomach. Then I sat down in the dirt and through the cracks in the

seats watched the football team practice, wishing I could stay there

forever.

My breath falters as I climb out of the car, into the snow and

the wintry air. As soon as I slam the door, the tires spin in the slush as he peels away without looking back. Even though I feel like

chasing after him, I turn around and walk back inside with my head

hung low.

Kayden

I’m officially the world’s biggest asshole as I pull out of that

parking lot. I’ve snubbed the world’s saddest girl not once but

twice, and on top of that, I kissed her. I’m a fucking prick. I can see her watching the car as I peel out onto the road, her head hung