"Sorry, Guido," I said, trying to restructure my thinking. "I guess I'm more tired than I realized. Didn't mean to snap at you."
"Don't worry. Boss," the bodyguard grinned. "I've been expectin' it. All the big operators I've worked with get a little crabby when the heat's on. If anything, your temper gettin' short is the best thing I've seen since we started this caper. That's why I've been so jumpy myself. I wasn't sure if you weren't taking the job seriously, or if you were just too dumb to know the kind of odds we were up against. Now that you're acting normal for the situation, I feel a lot better about how it's goin' to come out in the end."
Terrific! Now that I was at the end of my rope, our eternal pessimist thought things were going great.
"Okay," I said, rubbing my forehead with one finger, "we haven't got much information to go on, and what we do know is bad. According to Vilhelm, Aahz is being held in the most escape-proof cell they have, which is the top floor of the highest tower in town. If we try to take him from the inside, we're going to have to fool or fight every guard on the way up and down. To me, that means our best bet is to spring him from the outside."
My assistants nodded vigorously, their faces as enthusiastic as if I had just said something startlingly original and clever.
"Now, with my powers at low ebb. I don't think I can levitate that far and spring the cell. Massha, do you have anything in your jewelry collection that would work for rope and climbing hooks?"
"N-no," she said hesitantly, which surprised me. She usually had a complete inventory of her nasty pretties on the tip of her tongue.
"I saw a coil of rope hangin' just inside the door," Guido supplied.
"I noticed it, too," I acknowledged, "but it isn't nearly long enough. We'll just have to use up my power getting up to the cell and figure some other way of opening the window."
"Ummm… you don't have to do that. High Roller," Massha said with a sigh. "I've got something we can use."
"What's that?"
"The belt I'm wearing with all my gear hung on it. It's a levitation belt. The controls aren't horribly reliable, but it should do to get us to the top of the tower."
I cocked an eyebrow at my apprentice.
"Wait a minute, Massha. Why didn't you mention this when I asked?"
She looked away quickly.
"You didn't ask about a belt. Only about rope and climbing hooks."
"Since when do I have to ask you specific questions… or any questions, for that matter, to get your input?"
"All right," she sighed. "If you really want to know, I was hoping we could find a way to do this without using the belt."
"Why?"
"It embarrasses me."
"It what?"
"It embarrasses me. I look silly floating around in the air. It's okay for skinny guys like you and Guido, but when I try it, I look like a blimp. All I'd need is Goodyear tattooed on my side to make the picture complete."
I closed my eyes and tried to remember that I was tired and that I shouldn't take it out on my friends. The fact that Massha was worried about appearances while I was trying to figure out a way to get us all out of this alive wasn't really infuriating. It was… flattering! That was it! She was so confident of my abilities to get us through this crisis that she had time to think about appearances! Of course, the possibility of betraying that confidence set me off in another round of worrying. Wonderful.
"You okay. Boss?"
"Hmmm? Yeah. Sure, Guido. Okay. Now Massha floats up to the window, which leaves you and me free to…"
"Hold it, Hot Stuff," Massha said, holding up a hand. "I think I'd better explain a little more about this belt. I bought it in an 'as-is' rummage sale, and the controls are not all they should be."
"How so?"
"Well, the 'up' control works okay, but the 'altitude' is shaky so you're never sure how much you can lift or how high it will go. The real problem, though, is the 'down' control. There's no tapering-off effect, so it's either on or off."
I was never particularly good at technical jargon, but flying was something I knew so I could almost follow her.
"Let me see if I've got this right," I said. "When you go up, you aren't sure how much power you'll have, and when you land…"
"…it ain't gentle," she finished for me. "Basically, you fall from whatever height you're at to the ground."
"I don't know much about this magic stuff," Guido commented dryly, "but that doesn't sound so good. Why would you use a rig like that, anyway?"
"I don't… at least not for flying," Massha said. "Remember, I told you I think it makes me look silly? All I use it for is a utility belt… you know, like Batman? I mean, it's kind of pretty, and it isn't easy to find belts in my size."
"Whatever," I said, breaking into their fashion discussion. "We're going to use it tonight to get up to the cell even if it means rigging some kind of ballast system. Now all we need to figure out is how to open the cell window and a getaway plan. Guido, it occurs to me that we might pick up a few lessons on jailbreaks from your experiences even if they were unsuccessful. I mean, negative examples can be as instructive as positive examples. So tell me, in your opinion what went wrong in the plans you followed in the past?"
The bodyguard's brow furrowed as it took on the unaccustomed exercise of thought.
"I dunno, Boss. It seems that however much planning was done, something always came up that we hadn't figured on. If I had to hang our failures on any one thing, I'd say it was just that… over planning. I mean, after weeks of lectures and practice sessions, you get a little overconfident, so when something goes wrong you're caught flatfooted, know what I mean?"
Nervous as we were, that got a laugh from both Massha and me.
"Well, that's one problem we won't have to worry about," I said. "Our planning time is always minimal, and for this caper we're going to have to put it together in a matter of hours."
"If you take hours, you'll never pull it off," Vilhelm said, entering our planning room just in time to hear my last comment.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Massha growled.
"Say, are you sure you guys are on the level?" the vampire said, ignoring my apprentice. "It occurs to me that I've only got your word on all this… that Vic is still alive and all. If you're taking advantage of my good nature to get me involved in something crooked…"
"He's alive," I assured him. "I've seen him myself since we were here last… but you didn't answer the question. What was that you were saying about what would happen if we took hours to plan the jailbreak?"
The Dispatcher shrugged.
"I suppose you guys know what you're doing and I should keep my mouth shut, but I was getting a little worried. I mean, it's sundown already, and if you're going to make your move before the execution, it had better be soon."
"How do you figure that?" I frowned. "The action isn't slated until high midnight. I had figured on waiting a while until it was dark and things quieted down around town a little."
"Are you kidding?" the vampire said with a start, his eyebrows going up to his hairline. "That's when… oh, I get it. You're still thinking in terms of your off dimension timetables. You've got to… umm, you might want to be sitting down for this, Skeeve."
"Lay it on me," I said, rubbing my forehead again. "What have I overlooked now? Even without the blindfold and the cigarette I'd just as soon take the bad news standing up."
"Well, you've got to remember that you're dealing with a city of vampires here. Sundown is the equivalent of dawn to us. That's when things start happening, not when they start winding down! That means…"
"… that high midnight is a major traffic time and the longer we wait, the more people there will be on the street," I said, trying to suppress a groan.