He met her eyes and then shook his head. "Not when I'm sane."

"Diaz said in their hearts all men believe women are whores."

"Diaz is wrong. But there's a streak of the primitive that makes us think women will always go to the strong. It's something I can't fight."

"The hell you can't," she said unsteadily. "And you are strong, Joe. Even if you were in a wheelchair, you'd still be stronger than any other man I've met."

"I won't ask if that includes Montalvo."

"I did not fuck him."

"But did you want to?" He moved toward the door. "I think the answer is yes. I don't even want you to deny it. I don't think I'd believe you. Hell, you may not even realize that you do."

"But of course you can see right into my psyche as if it were a blueprint."

"Yes, I know you. Maybe better than you know yourself."

He had reached the door and panic seared through her. "Don't you dare leave. We have to talk."

"Not now. I'm a little raw at the moment. Okay, I have an ego and you stung me by closing me out of the action. That could be part of it. And after all these years of dealing with your obsession about finding Bonnie maybe I'm just tired. I don't know. I have to do some thinking."

"Joe…"

He gazed back at her. "I know you care about me. I know you're upset and hurt. I can't help you this time, Eve." The French doors closed behind him.

Jesus.

She sank into the rattan chair and huddled there. She had hurt him and that was the last thing she wanted to do. She had to find a way to help him, heal him. Yes, she was hurting, too, but she was afraid no one could help her.

Those last words had sounded too much like good-bye.

Eve was still on the veranda when Montalvo came back to the compound four hours later.

"Eve?"

She stirred and sat up straight in the chair. "Is everything secured at the village?"

"A few pockets of resistance. Armandariz can take care of the rest." He squatted in front of her chair. "I came to take care of you."

"I'm fine."

"Liar." His fingers moved delicately over her jawline. "You're tense as a violin string. Galen said you'd gone out here to talk to Quinn."

She nodded jerkily.

"And it didn't go well."

"You could say that."

"Why?"

"He thinks I want to go to bed with you."

His fingers continued to stroke her cheek. "Do you?"

"Sometimes." She hadn't realized she'd blurt out the truth that she hadn't fully admitted to herself. "But it's only sex. And I won't do it."

He sighed. "I'm afraid that's true. But what a splendid match we'd make. It would be beyond belief." He touched her lips with his forefinger. "Just once, Eve?"

She shook her head. "Even if there weren't Joe I couldn't risk it. You're… I think you'd be too much."

"Too much what?"

"Too much darkness, too much intensity, too much passion." She shrugged helplessly. "Too much."

"I'm working on the darkness. I believe I have a chance to come into the light now that I've brought Nalia home and killed Diaz. The intensity and the passion?" He smiled. "No way. I told you that we mirrored each other. It may be those qualities that are my most potent ammunition."

Her lip was tingling beneath his touch and she turned her head. "I like my life. I love Joe. You'd… devour me."

"I might try." He rose to his feet. "You're feeling insecure at the moment or you wouldn't be so lacking in confidence. I think I'll leave you alone to pull yourself together. You don't know how difficult it is to be this restrained." He gazed down at her with a smile. "What a team we'd be, Eve. We'd have it all."

She shook her head.

He studied her face. "You don't want to take that first step. I'd help you, Eve. There's so much more between us than sex."

"I love Joe," she repeated.

"Of course you do. But there's a place for me too. I can't promise I won't try to squeeze Quinn out. We're both alpha males. But I can be patient. I know what we have in store for us. I see it. I can feel it."

And he was making her feel it too, she realized. He was blurring the images and drawing her into the circle of intensity as he always did. Fight it.

But dear God, she was weary of fighting.

"I could push it," he said softly. "You're hurting and I may never get another chance when you're this vulnerable." He shook his head. "But that's not good enough for me. I want you to walk toward me and take my hand. I want you to stand beside me as you did in that church, strong and independent and joined in purpose." He turned and headed for the door. "So I'll wait. My time will come."

He was gone.

Relief cascaded through her.

Relief… and disappointment.

Jesus, what the hell was happening to her? She had always known where she was going and this bewilderment was tearing her to pieces.

Forget it. Go to bed. It wasn't as if she were the one to make a decision, she thought bitterly. She wasn't sure Joe still wanted her. Montalvo had already said she wasn't enough for him right now. She might very well end up alone.

And it would probably serve her right. Perhaps a person as obsessed as she should be alone. That way she wouldn't hurt anyone but herself.

She got to her feet. No use sitting here brooding. She would shower, start to pack, and then go to sleep. Tomorrow she'd talk to Montalvo about arranging for her to go back to Atlanta.

It was time to put her life back on track.

"Eve? Are you asleep?"

She turned over in bed to see Joe silhouetted in the open doorway. "No. Come in."

He closed the door and crossed the room to the bed. "I was going to wait until morning. But I couldn't do it."

"It's close enough." She glanced at the clock on the nightstand. "It's almost four A.M. That's morning." She sat up in bed. "And I couldn't sleep anyway." She tried to smile. "You pretty well blew me away."

"I know. I had… issues."

"Obviously. Will it help if I tell you I understand every single one?"

He sat down on the bed beside her. "It helps."

"Should I turn on the light?"

"Not now. There's enough moonlight coming in that window." He was silent a moment. "I can work my way through most of those issues. Once I'm healthy I don't believe you're going to treat me like a second-class citizen. You never have before."

"You were never hurt and in danger before. I don't promise I wouldn't do the same thing again. I love you, Joe. Protection goes with the territory. It's self-preservation for me as well as you."

"Then I'll have to be damn sure I don't get wounded again. I can't take it." He paused. "And I'm not afraid of Montalvo. I can find ways to make you forget him. He's the new kid on the block. I know you better than he ever could."

I looked at you and saw myself.

"Yes."

"That wasn't very convincing."

"I'm convinced you can do anything you want to do."

He reached out and took her hand. "Except one thing."

She knew what was coming and instinctively tensed.

"Bonnie. I can't make you forget Bonnie."

"No, you can't," she said unevenly. "Not ever. And if that's becoming a problem, it's the one thing I can't solve."

"It's a problem. I used to think if I could just find her that it would be over. But it's not happening and you almost died this time trying to find her."

"And so did you."

"Yet when we get back to the U.S., you're going to go after that lead Montalvo got for you."

"Yes." Her hand tightened. "So if you're smart, you'll leave me. You don't deserve this."

He looked down at their joined hands. "Do you want me to leave you? Will it make it easier for you?"

"God, no."

He was silent a moment. "Then I think I'll stick around." He kicked off his shoes. "Scoot over. The last time I held you, I was so drugged I couldn't appreciate it."