Chapter Two:
"Success often hinges on choosing a
reliable partner."
—REMUS
"WHAT'S that?" Guido demanded, taking advantage of
our stunned silence.
"It's a door," I said.
"An open door, to be specific," Aahz supplied.
"I can see that for myself!" the bodyguard roared. "I
meant what is it doing here?"
"It would look pretty silly standing alone in the mid-
dle of the street now, wouldn't it?" Aahz shot back.
Guido purpled. As I've said, these two have a positive
talent for getting under each other's skins.
"Now look, all I'm askin'...."
"Guido, could you just hang on for a few minutes
until we decide what to do next? Then we'll explain, I
promise."
My mind was racing over the problem, and having
Aahz and Guido going at each other did nothing for my
concentration.
"I think the first thing we should do, partner," Aahz
11
12 Robert Asprin
said thoughtfully, "is to get the door closed so that we
won't be... interrupted while we work this out."
Rather than answer, I reached out a cautious toe and
pushed the door shut. Aahz quickly slipped two of the
bolts in place to secure it.
That done, we leaned against the door and looked at
each other in silence.
"Well? What do you think?" I asked at last.
"I'm in favor of sealing it up again and forgetting the
whole thing."
"Think it's safe to do that?"
"Don't know, really. Not enough information."
We both turned slowly to level thoughtful stares at
Guido.
"Say, uh, Guido, could you tell us a little more about
those customers who came in this morning?"
"Nothing doin'." Guido crossed his arms. "You're
the guys who insist on 'information for information.'
Right? Well, I'm not telling you anything more until
somebody tells me about that door. I mean, I'm sup-
posed to be your bodyguard and nobody bothers to tell
me there's another way into this place?"
Aahz bared his teeth and started forward, but I
caught him by the shoulder.
"He's right, partner. If we want his help, we owe him
an explanation."
We locked eyes again for a moment, then he shrugged
and retreated.
"Actually, Guido, the explanation is very sim-
ple. ..."
"That'll be a first," the bodyguard grumbled.
In a bound, Aahz was across the room and had Guido
by the shirt front.
"You wanted an explanation? Then SHUT UP AND
LET HIM EXPLAIN!"
MYTH-ING PERSONS 13
Now Guido is no lightweight, and he's never been
short in the courage department. Still, there's nothing
quite like Aahz when he's really mad.
"0—Okay! Sorry! Go ahead. Boss. I'm listening."
Aahz released his grip and returned to his place by the
door, winking at me covertly as he went.
"What happened is this," I said, hiding a smile.
"Aahz and I found that door when we first moved in
here. We didn't like the looks of it, so we decided to
leave it alone. That's all."
"That's all!? A back door that even you admit looks
dangerous and all you do is ignore it? And if that wasn't
bad enough, you don't even bother to tell your body-
guards about it? Of all the lamebrained, half...."
Aahz cleared his throat noisily, and Guido regained
control of himself... rapidly.
"Aahh... what I mean to say is ... oh well. That's
all behind us now. Could you give me a little more in-
formation now that the subject's out in the open?
What's on the other side of that door, anyway?"
"We don't know," I admitted.
"YOU DON'T KNOW?" Guido shrieked.
"What we do know," Aahz interrupted hastily, "is
what isn't on the other side. What isn't there is any di-
mension we know about."
Guido blinked, then shook his head. "I don't get it.
Could you run that past me again ... real slow?"
"Let me try," I said. "Look, Guido, you already
know about dimensions, right? How we're living in the
dimension Deva, which is an entirely different world
than our own home dimension of Klah? Well, the
people here, the Deveels, are masters of dimension
travel to a point where they build their houses across the
dimension barriers. That's how come this place is bigger
on the inside than it is on the outside. The door is in
14 Robert Asprin
Deva, but the rest of the house is in another dimension.
That means if we go through that door, the back door
that we've just shown you, we'd be in another world ...
one we know nothing about. That's why we were willing
to leave it sealed up rather than stick our noses out into
a completely unknown situation."
"I still think you should have checked it out," the
bodyguard insisted stubbornly.
"Think again," Aahz supplied. "You've only seen
two dimensions. Skeeve here has visited a dozen. I've
been to over a hundred myself. The Deveels you see here
at the Bazaar, on the other hand, know over a thousand
different dimensions."
"So?"
"So we think they gave us this place because it opens
into a dimension that they don't want... 'don't want'
as in 'scared to death of. Now, you've seen what a
Deveel will brave to turn a profit. Do you want to go ex-
ploring in a world that's too mean for them to face?"
"I see what you mean."
"Besides." Aahz finished triumphantly, "take an-
other look at that door. It's got more locks and bolts
than three ordinary bank vaults."
"Somebody opened it," Guido said pointedly.
That took some of the wind out of Aahz's sails.
Despite himself, he shot a nervous glance at the door.
"Well... a good thief with a lockpick working from
this side...."
"Some of these locks weren't picked, Aahz."
I had been taking advantage of their discussion to do
a little snooping, and now held up one of my discoveries
for their inspection. It was a padlock with the metal
shackle snapped off. There were several of them scat-
tered about, as if someone had gotten impatient with the
MYTH-ING PERSONS 15
lockpick and simply torn the rest of them apart with his
hands.
Guido pursed his lips in a silent whistle. "Man, that's
strong. What kind of person could do that?"
"That's what we've been trying to get you to tell us,"
Aahz said nastily. "Now, if you don't mind, what were
those customers like?"
"Three of them... two men and a woman... fairly
young-looking, but nothing special. Klahds by the look
of 'em. Come to think of it, they did seem a bit nervous,
but I thought it was just because they were coming to see
a magician."
"Well, now they're on the other side of the door."
Aahz scooped up one of the undamaged locks and
snapped it into place. "I don't think they can pick
locks, or break them if they can't reach 'em. They're
there, which is their problem, self-inflicted I might add,
and we're here. End of puzzle. End of problem."
"Do you really think so, Aahz?"
"Trust me."
Somehow that phrase struck a familiar chord in my
memory, and the echoes weren't pleasant. I was about
to raise this point with Aahz when Nunzio poked his
head in the door.
"Hey, Boss. You got visitors."
"See?" my partner exclaimed, beaming. "I told you
things could only get better! It's not even noon and
we've got more customers."
"Actually," Nunzio clarified, "it's a delegation of
Deveels. I think it's the landlord."
"The landlord?" Aahz echoed hollowly.
"See how much better things have gotten?" I said
with a disgusted smirk. "And it's not even noon."
"Shall I run 'em off, Boss?" Guido suggested.
16 Robert Asprin
"I think you'd better see *em," Nunzio advised.
"They seem kind'a upset. Something about us harbor-
ing fugitives."
Aahz and I locked gazes in silence, which was only
natural as there was nothing more to be said. With a
vague wave that bordered on a nervous tick, I motioned
for Nunzio to show the visitors in.
As expected, it was the same delegation of four from
the Devan Chamber of Commerce who had originally
hired us to work for the Bazaar, headed by our old ad-
versary, Hay-ner. Last time we dealt with him, we had
him over a barrel and used the advantage mercilessly.
While he had agreed to our terms, I always suspected it
had hurt his Devan pride to cut such a generous deal and
that he had been waiting ever since to pay us back. From
the smile on his face as he entered our reception room, it
appeared he felt his chance had finally come.
"Aahh, Master Skeeve," he said. "How good of you
to see us so promptly without an appointment. I know
how busy you are, so I'll come right to the point. I
believe there are certain individuals in residence here
that our organization is most anxious to speak with. If
you would be so kind as to summon them, we won't
trouble you further."
"Wait a minute, Hay-ner," Aahz put in before I
could respond. "What makes you think the people
you're looking for are here?"
"Because they were seen entering your tent less than
an hour ago and haven't come out yet," said the largest
of Hay-ner's back-up team.
I noticed that unlike Hay-ner, he wasn't smiling. In
fact, he looked down-right angry.