"BANG!

"A tremendous earthquake! Tidal waves!

"RELAX ISLAND HAD BEEN BLOWN TO BITS!

"Dear Jettero came back and he questioned Prahd but Prahd told him, 'It couldn't have been the fuel! Every bar was in its own insulated container!' "And dear Jettero said, 'The only way it could have blown up was by taking every bar out of its carton and stacking them all together!' "And Prahd said, 'But I told them all specifically not to DO that!' "And Jettero said, 'I know what happened. Madison said he'd put it on the map: he didn't. He took it off forever. It was only a volcanic bubble. I warned Teenie. Madison blew up Relax Island just to get a headline!' "And the sad part of it was," said Pratia, "he didn't even get a single mention of it in the papers. Not even his own obituary. And that was the end of all of them, and Relax Island, too." • • Xll Both girls began to sob. They clutched at me for comfort. Pratia let out a shuddering sigh and then she said, "Well, cheer up. The evening is still early. Asa, wipe your tears away and turn on the music." The girl let go of me and sprang up from the bed. She opened a big white console and fed the slot a strip. There was a thunder and then a beat. The volume bashed my ears. The whang and wow of electronic instruments began to rip the tortured air. I had never in my life before heard such sounds. They hammered you and somehow worked at you and made your hips twitch. Psychedelic sunset! Woo-oo! Woo-oo! Psychedelic sunset! Woo-oo! Woo-oo! Psychedelic sunset! Woo-oo! Woo-oo! Psychedelic sunset! Woo-oo! Woo-oo! Lik's open lips were close beside my ear. "Isn't it divine?" she whispered. "Gran-gran copied Teenie's whole library onto strips. Oh, listen to that Punk Rock!" "Lik!" yelled Pratia above the pulsing din. "Don't just lie there. Do your duty!" The girl leaped, her body jerking, and rushed to a bureau. She got a drawer open, hips bucking t6 the rhythm as she worked. She got out some greenish leaves and papers and began to roll thick, fat cylinders about three inches long. Still bucking to the music pulse, she handed one to Pratia. With slamming heels and heaving thighs she pushed one into the clutching grasp of Asa. Then she leaped across me and as her hair jerked near my face, crammed the end of a cylinder in my mouth. Fire sprang up from her hand. "Drag deep!" she yelled at me as she applied the flame. "Suck it down into your lungs and hold it." The smoke almost strangled me. "What is it?" I coughed. "Panama Red! The very best! I see I got to teach you how to use a joint! DRAG! DRAG! Oh, listen to that rock!" I expelled the sweetish smoke. Head jerking in the music din, Lik took a drag. She sucked it down into her lungs and held it. Then she let it out. "Oh, Heavenly!" she crooned. Asa had gotten back on the bed, white fog wreathing from her mouth. She jammed her joint between my lips and cried, "DRAG! DRAG! Then you'll hear the music!" I dragged and got through coughing. I stole a look at Pratia. She was sitting there, head wreathed in smoke. Through it her eyes peered avidly. "All right, girls!" cried. Pratia. "You can practice your lessons now! HAVE AT HIM!" A wondrous soft feeling was suddenly enwrapping me. I felt like I was floating, detached. The music was suddenly wonderful beyond all imaginings as "Psychedelic Sunset" pounded on. But something else was happening. With searching fingers, the two girls were seeking out my spots. Before my eyes there was a blur of hands. I fixated on a finger that was probing at my throat. A joyous feeling began to spread through me. Two angels on the ceiling were leering down. More joints. More music. Hours later, I slept. • • • Xlll A horizontal shaft of sunlight came in the low window and pried at my eyelid. I moved my head. A pain went through it. I looked toward the chair where Pratia had sat. It was empty. I looked to my right: there lay Asa, mouth partly open, sound asleep. I looked to my left: there was Lik. She had a dreamy smile upon her face as she slumbered. Her arm was flung across my chest. It seemed to me to be a very good idea to get out of there. My throat felt parched. I was hungry. I ached. Using careful strategy, I disengaged Lik's hand and laid it gently on her thigh. Inching slowly, slowly, I worked my way from out between them down toward the foot of the bed. I was certain I could make it. My head reached the level of their thighs. Now, with just a final jerk of my legs, I would be upright and free. I surged up.

YOW!

One of them had grabbed my hair! "Come back here!" said Lik. "What's the matter? Don't you like us?" Asa said, looking around into my face. "Gran-gran is gone," said Lik. "We can skip the fancy stuff." "Yeah, man," said Asa. "We can get down to the real business!" "No, no!" I said. "I've got to go home! My head is killing me!" Lik stuck her eyes very close to mine. "Aha!" she said. "His eyes are all red." "Only one remedy for that," said Asa. Lik leaped out and got a joint and, before I could stop her, crammed it in my mouth. She lit it. "Drag deep and you'll feel better." Amazingly, I shortly did. A woolly cloud seemed to fill me. Each of them took some drags. They sat there watchfully to be sure I did not walk off, but then, looking carefully at my expression, they were finally assured I wasn't going to. Asa got up, found a strip and put it in the console. Music was shortly booming through the room, that weird electronic music with the heavy beat. A man was singing against a chorus: My mama never told me About the birds and bees. My papa always told me To stay off all boys' knees. So I have had no training, My appetite to vex. I have to find out on my own What there is to sex. So please excuse ferocity In ripping off your clothes. If you decline, please be assured, I'll punch you in the nose. Oh, now let's do it all again. I think I've got the hang. But I can't believe the birds and bees Get such a huge end bang! STICK IT TO ME, BABY! "My sentiments exactly!" said Asa and she made a grab for me. I would have escaped but I collided with Lik. She slammed me hard on the chest and knocked me back on the bed. The speakers slammed into my ears with their heavy beat. Asa's scream made the bottom end of the curtains fly out the window. "Now, just have a quiet puff," said Lik. I was surely puffing. Marijuana smoke soared into the air. A cupid grinned when Lik's voice Said, "Me, now me!" Lik screamed and the marijuana smoke and the curtains flew away. The marijuana butt was burning on the floor. Trying to wrap the sheet around me, I scrambled back from the bed. "Oh, my Gods," I said, "I may have made both of you pregnant!" Asa was wrapping a robe around her. She laughed. "No worries about that, Monte Pennwell. Prahd hands us out birth control pills." My clothes were on the floor and I was edging toward them. Suddenly I stopped and stared at them. I shook my head. "Pratia told me that you both were virgins!" "Hah!" said Lik. "And there won't be any virgins left in the whole Confederacy when we get through spreading Teenie's stuff around! We're only learning now, but you just wait." I picked up my pants, still clutching the sheet about me. But I was hit with a new thought. "Does Prahd…?" "Oh, Heavens, no," said Lik. "What a thing to infer. Prahd never touches anyone around here. Why should he, when he's got nurses by the score? Come on, Asa, let's clean this boy up. He has a dirty mind." They hit me like two lepertiges about to tear their prey limb from limb. They threw me into the shower. The water poured down in a steaming cascade. They jumped in with me. Their heads were just a blur. Asa's hand reached out and undipped a rod vibrator from its hook on the bathroom wall. She held it there a moment while it shook. Lik's hand reached out and grabbed a block of soap. The shower jets were pushing steam. "Stand still!" cried Lik. I screamed. The slippery block of soap flew out and hit the bathroom wall. Asa was laughing as her hand scrabbled on the floor for it. "Now me! Now let me do it to him!" The shower jets went stronger. I screamed again! Water was pouring out of the drain and vanishing. "Now wasn't that lovely, Monte?" said Lik. They were wrapping a huge towel around me. I was shaking like a leaf in a storm. "I know what we should do," said Asa. "We'll fix him up as a present for Har." "Who's Har?" I trembled. They were both in loose robes now and they sat me down at a makeup table. It had lots of mirrors. I said, "I look AWFUL!" "Nothing like putting a new face on it to meet the day," said Lik. She powdered my face with a spray can. Asa took some blue paint from a pot. She put it on my eyelids. Then she took a black pen and drew in eyebrows and huge lashes. Lik put spots of red on my cheeks. Asa painted my mouth scarlet so it was very big-lipped. They stood back and admired their handiwork. Then Asa grabbed a filmy negligee and slipped me into it. I stared down at the frilly collar. "Oh, you look so pretty now," said Lik. "I feel terrible," I said. "I've got to go." "Pish, pish," said Asa. "The sun is hardly up." She grabbed three joints. I made a feeble effort to leave but they towed me over to the bed. Asa put a joint in my mouth and lit it. Lik, dragging at her own, went over to the player and put a new strip in. Shortly, the whining beat of the music was pounding the walls. Two on one is lots of fun, When you can't have three. It's now begun for everyone, So let's all have a spree! When we're all done, another one Will start with you on me!