“Where do you think to go, woman?”
He didn’t sound angry. And she had known she might have to talk her way out of there instead. But her heart was pounding in fright. Stars, how she hated confrontations.
“I-I’ve changed my mind, Falon.”
His answer was to lift her with an arm around her waist and carry her back to the fur pelts. Shanelle’s anxiety turned into panic.
“Didn’t you hear me?” she wailed.
“Indeed,” he said as he laid her down and came down to half cover her body with his. “Yet have I not changed my mind, so best you change yours again. You wanted me. You chose me, woman.”
“That was before you started acting so damn warriorlike. But you couldn’t be enough like a warrior where it counts, could you?” she accused him. “You had to be too emotional. Well, you’re toe farden big to be that intense!”
“And this frightens you?”
“Are you kidding? I have strange reactions to pain, Falon Van’yer. I get hysterical. Now let me up.”
Slowly he shook his head. “I regret your fear, kerima, but I have told you I will not hurt you. The proof will be in the doing.”
“Wait!”
Shanelle didn’t have a chance to say more, for he was discovering the benefits of Kystrani clothing. It was designed for quick and easy removal. A tug, a push, and it simply fell away from the body. But it had never come off as fast as it did in Falon’s hands. And then his hand held her mouth still for his ravishment, while his other hand discovered the shape and responsiveness of her breasts. And there was nothing she could do to stop him. Then suddenly… she wasn’t sure anymore that she wanted to stop him.
He wasn’t hurting her. The only intensity just then was in his kiss, and it was stirring up all those powerful sensations she had felt when she had first seen him. Had she been wrong to let her cowardice take over? The man was showing her that the proof was in the doing, and the doing was calming her fears enough to let her body delight in what was happening.
In less time than she would have thought possible, he made her want him again, really want him, and her hope returned that this was the man she could accept as a lifemate. Her fear wasn’t completely buried, but it became secondary to her first taste of passion, which nearly overwhelmed her as she experienced Falon learning her body.
Stars, he wrung gasps from her, but before long, only half of them were from pleasure. The man had too much strength in his hands, and it was his wont to touch her everywhere. Yet the pleasure was there, undeniably, and in unrelenting control of her. He found areas of her body that she had no idea could be so sensitive. His mouth tasted, bit, stirred a trembling heat within her that spread throughout her body, and she wanted more.
There was no embarrassment, no shyness left to make her awkward or hesitant. She was open to him, his to command, a mindless body in the throes of first passion, a mere puppet to his slightest whim. Even the sporadic roughness that kept her fear just beneath the surface was understandable, for she discovered her own need to hold to him tightly, to ease the wild inner turmoil now raging inside her by squeezing, even biting him. The strength of her desire made it almost a compulsion-and it made her finally beg him to take her.
That was a mistake, letting him know just how much she now wanted their joining. The knowledge affected Falon in a way she had hoped to avoid. His breathing became rough, his hands rougher still as he positioned her, and Shanelle’s worry became reality. He lost control to his passion. There was more pain than pleasure now as his arms wrapped under her and tightened as he claimed her. Her ribs were about to crack, she could barely breathe, and the scream that was torn from her at his swift penetration was lost in his kiss.
Mercifully, she lost consciousness.
Chapter 8
The moment Shanelle returned to awareness she opened her eyes, then wished she hadn’t. It was all real, Falon, the pain-and it wasn’t over. She was still there, in his tent, naked. But at least he wasn’t still crushing her with his weight, or causing that excruciating pain with his…
He lay beside her on his side, leaning on one elbow as he watched her closely. He wasn’t touching her. Right now she’d probably scream if he did.
Oh, Stars, how could she have been such a fool to give herself to a man of completely unknown qualities? Just because her body had demanded she do so was no excuse. He’d hurt her. He’d allowed his passion free rein and crushed her in those powerful arms. She felt bruised all over and she wouldn’t be surprised if something was broken. And inside her, she was probably ripped apart. That
pain had been so terrible she’d fainted to avoid it.
To think her hopes had returned, and so strongly, that he was the right man for her. Her disappointment was almost as painful as the rest. She knew a warrior would never have hurt her like that. A warrior was always gentle with a woman because of his size. But Falon wasn’t a warrior. He didn’t have a warrior’s control over his emotions. He’d claimed he did, but it had been proved otherwise. So no matter how much he had attracted her, he wouldn’t do for anything permanent. But, oh, Stars, what a shame.
She had to get out of there and quickly, before her disappointment put tears in her eyes. She’d been so sure of Falon to begin with, then again at the end, sure enough to want to join with him and leave the getting to know him for later. How was she ever going to find another man who could make her feel what this one did, in the short time she had before her father made the decision for her? And even if she did manage to find one, she’d probably be too afraid to test for compatibility again. She could no longer trust her instincts in the matter.
With those depressing thoughts, Shanelle started to get up, groaned with the movement, and got a large hand pressed to the center of her chest until she was lying flat again. “You will lie still until the bleeding stops.”
She paled at those softly spoken words. “Bleeding?”
“A normal occurrence for a woman’s first time, yet is there some excess. You should have told me.”
Why was she now blushing? “I don’t see that it would have made any difference.”
“I am not a wild beast,” he said reproachfully.
That was debatable, but all Shanelle said was, “I have to go.”
Again she tried to get up. His hand came back to her chest and stayed there this time.
“We will talk first,” he told her.
She put some reproach in her own tone. “I think we should have talked a little more before. Now there’s nothing more to say.”
“There is much to say, and you will begin by telling me why you gifted me with your first time.”
The blush wasn’t leaving her cheeks. “It’s no big deal where I come from.”
That was only a partial lie, since she had just come from Kystran, where virginity was considered an unwanted inconvenience. In fact, it was usually gotten rid of painlessly in a meditech before a woman started sex-sharing. On Sha-Ka’an it was another story. Here it was prized and expected to be gifted to a woman’s lifemate.
Shanelle knew that, but she was only half Sha-Ka’ani. She had hoped she would be giving that prized gift to her lifemate. She’d held on to it for just that reason. But she wasn’t devastated that it wasn’t going to turn out that way. She had too much of her mother’s philosophy to be upset over a piece of torn membrane-that was bleeding excessively.
“I have to go,” she reiterated firmly.
“You are welcome to try.”
The hand on her chest said Don’t bother. “You can’t keep me here, Falon.”
“I can and I will,” he stated simply. “Until the fear leaves you and you know-”