I tried not to sound too envious of her dilemma. “I thought you were still grounded.”

“I’ve found ways around my parents’ unreasonable restrictions. I pretend to go to bed and sneak out my bedroom window. That’s the beauty of having a ground-floor bedroom: I get to have a good time, and my parents get to have a good night’s sleep.”

It was ironic that she didn’t ever get caught doing this, since the one time I’d snuck out, Elise’s mother had called and squealed on me.

I never had much to say about guys to Elise. I was still manless. Bob talked to me in chess club, but he didn’t ask me out again. Maybe he didn’t want to repeat the ordeal any more than I did.

Chad saw various girls, none of whom I liked as they all had the serious shortcoming of not being me. Josh was still seeing Courtney. I didn’t like her either. Somehow over the last few weeks, Josh had improved on my guy scale to ten—perhaps even a ten and a half.

One morning I was in the library looking through the biography section for a social studies report, and Samantha strolled up to me. She casually pulled a book from a shelf near me. “Where’s Elise this morning?”

I flipped through the table of contents in a biography about Joan of Arc. “I don’t know.”

Samantha replaced one book and took off another. “Oh. That’s right. You’re only friends with Elise when Josh is around.”

My head jerked up. “I am not.”

She sent me a knowing look. “Oh come on. You practically hang off of him.”

“I do not.” I felt myself turning red. I couldn’t believe she was saying this stuff to me.

Her voice was light and airy. “Cassidy, if you hung on to him any tighter, they’d have to pry you off every evening with the Jaws of Life.”

“That’s not true,” I insisted. “We’re just friends.”

“And I’m sure you’re disappointed about that.” She turned her back to me and walked off.

I was so steamed I couldn’t think of anything else for the next two periods. I was busy thinking of what I should have said, starting with, “Why do you care?” and ending with places she could put her pompoms.

I hoped that sometime Josh would come up and talk to me in the hallway while Samantha was around, but he never did.

* * *

I took my driver’s test again and passed. Mr. Jensen marked me off with the same sour expression he’d worn when I’d ridden with him the first time. His one personal comment during the whole thing was, “Try to keep off the sidewalk.”

I did.

Despite my success, I never asked my parents if I could take the car to school. I liked the time I spent with Elise and Josh.

One day Elise wasn’t in English class. She didn’t show up at my locker after school either. I figured she’d probably left school early, and I walked out to the parking lot.

Josh was waiting in his car. When I walked up, he glanced behind me. “Where’s Elise?”

“I don’t know. She wasn’t in English.”

He let out a grunt. “She’s skipping classes again.”

“It might not be that. She might have gone home sick.” I didn’t get in the car. Usually I sat in the backseat, but it seemed odd to sit there if Elise wasn’t coming. It would make Josh seem like he was my chauffer or something. I looked back across the parking lot, searching for her.

Josh shook his head. “Elise is supposed to tell me if I’m not taking her home. That way I don’t wait around for her, and I consent to let her ride with me the next day.” He put his keys in the ignition. “Well, let’s go.”

As I walked around to the car, I heard Elise calling. I turned and saw her and Chad walking towards us. They were holding hands.

“I won’t need a ride home,” Elise said. “Chad and I are getting something to eat.” Then she gave us her wicked grin.

They walked past Josh’s car down the parking lot. I didn’t let my gaze follow them. I got in the front seat of Josh’s car and stared at the dashboard. As long as I didn’t have to look at anything else, I could make it home without doing something to embarrass myself, like crying.

I hoped Josh wouldn’t say anything to me, that he would just turn on the radio and ignore me. I kept looking at the dashboard, but all I saw was Chad and Elise—and Elise’s wicked grin.

Josh started up the car and navigated through the parking lot. He turned on the radio and flipped through the stations.

“You have a lousy selection of music in Pullman. You know that, don’t you?”

“Yes.”

There was a small pause. “So, how was sophomore life today?”

“Fine.”

He didn’t say anything for a minute, but I could tell he was glancing over at me.

“You’re quiet today. Is something wrong?”

“No.”

“Was it something Elise did?”

And then my worst fear came true. I cried. A lot. I rummaged through my backpack for a tissue. Why, I asked myself, hadn’t I worn my waterproof mascara today?

The car stopped. I looked up and saw we were at a neighborhood park.

“Why are we here?”

“I thought you might want to talk about it.”

What I wanted was to go home and wash mascara off my cheeks. I attempted to do it with the tissue.

“It’s something stupid,” I said.

“Of course it is. If it involves Elise, stupidity is a given.”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“I’ve lived with Elise for a long time, I’ll understand.” He leaned against his door so he could face me. “Besides, I can’t take you home looking like that. Your dad already doesn’t like me.”

“My dad doesn’t like you?” I kept wiping the mascara off my cheeks. “What are you talking about?”

“Whenever he sees me out walking our dog, he looks at me funny. Like he’s gritting his teeth.”

“He does not.”

“I can’t say I blame him. With Elise as a sister, people naturally question my morals. Besides,” he made a sweeping motion over himself, “with looks like mine, what girl could resist me? Fathers naturally want to lock up their daughters.”

I knew he was trying to make me smile, but I didn’t. I checked the car’s mirror to make sure the mascara smudges were gone. They were, along with all other traces of makeup. I looked terrible.

“What did she do?” Josh asked. “And was any of it illegal?”

I leaned back in the seat. “I guess Elise will tell you, if I don’t.” I didn’t say anything else for a minute. I tried to think how best to word it without making me sound like a total loser.

“You know that guy Elise was with?”

“Chad something-er-other, right?”

“Chad Warren. And the thing is, I’ve liked him since I was in eighth grade. Elise knew that.”

“You like Chad Warren?” Josh said this like it was a disease.

“I knew you wouldn’t understand.”

“I understand. I’m just surprised. I can’t picture you with Chad Warren.”

“Well you don’t have to try hard,” I said stiffly, “because it obviously isn’t going to happen.”

“No. I meant I thought you had better taste.”

I put the wadded up tissue in my backpack. “And what’s wrong with Chad?”

“The guy is full of himself. He’s a jerk.”

I zipped my backpack shut. “You don’t know anything about him.”

“Guys hear other guys talk. I’ve been in the weight room with him before. Trust me, he’s a jerk.”

I folded my arms.

“You wouldn’t think so highly of him if you ever heard him carrying on in the locker room.”

“Why? What did he say?”

Josh opened his mouth, then shut it again. “I can’t say that sort of thing to you. But look, if you like Chad so much, you don’t have to worry. Elise goes through guys quickly. Three months tops, and he’ll be back on the scamming scene.”

But that wasn’t the problem. “Elise knew I liked him. I’m supposed to be her friend. Hundreds of guys go to PHS. Why did she pick him?”

“Because she’s Elise.”

“All I’ve ever done is be nice to her, and she did this to me.”

Josh watched me in a half-amazed, half-questioning way. He really didn’t understand.


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