Dipping his head, he caught my lips in a kiss and pulled me on top of him. Both his hands stroked my thighs as he stared up at me, his eyes hooded.

“I like you,” he murmured.

“I like you, too.”

“You shouldn’t be so cynical about what we could be, you know.”

I crinkled my brow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I know what you were playing at just now, talking about me having kids, like the idea of you being in my future is such an impossibility.”

“Lee,” I said, air whooshing out of me when his thumbs dug into my muscles, massaging out the kinks. “My dad would disown me if he knew I was with you.”

“So what? You don’t even like the man.”

“I know that, but he’s my father. Besides, he’s a product of his environment. My parents grew up at a time when you couldn’t walk down the street without worrying if a bomb was going to go off. That kind of thing hardens people.”

“Hmm.” Lee grinned.

“Don’t ‘hmm’ me, you cheeky little shit. And what’s the grin for?”

“It’s for the fact that you’re gonna forget all this serious talk in a minute when I fuck you.”

“Oh, really?”

“Really. So hard it’ll rewire that brain of yours, so afterward, when you think about the future, all you can see is me in it.”

Reaching up, he palmed both my breasts, then bent forward and captured one of my nipples in his mouth. The action rendered me incapable of doing anything but surrendering. And when he flipped me over and pulled me onto all fours, he made good on his promise, because it might have been morning, but I really did see stars.

Thirteen

I was laughing so hard I had to bend over and hold my stomach, so hard that tears were rolling down my cheeks. Tony and I were sitting in the break room eating lunch and trying not to wet ourselves as Keira did an impression of DI Jennings.

“Constable, tuck your shirt in and straighten your tie. You look like the vagrant lovechild of Keith Richards and Worzel Gummidge.”

“Stop!” I begged, trying to calm my laughter. “I haven’t heard anyone use Worzel Gummidge as a reference since I was five years old.”

“That’s because you never bloody listen, do you, Sheehan? Cotton wool in the ears,” Keira clipped, not dropping the act.

I swiped a thumb under my eyes, finally calming down, and glanced up. The smile immediately fled my features, because standing in the doorway was none other than Jennings herself. Keira had her back turned, continuing with her impression. Jennings’ face was indecipherable, and I went completely silent, waiting for her to stride into the room and put Keira in her place. But she didn’t do that. Instead, she cast me a quick, uncomfortable glance, turned on her heel, and left without a word.

I wanted to tell Keira that she’d been caught, but I knew it’d only make her worry. If Jennings planned on reprimanding her, it was going to happen whether I told her or not. Packing away the end of my lunch, I felt a strange urge to go after Jennings. Even if she did relish making my job difficult, I couldn’t help but feel bad. I wanted to apologise for Keira, and for myself for laughing.

Leaving the break room and hurrying down the corridor, I made my way to her office, knocking gently on the door before stepping inside. What I saw when I entered made me wish I’d waited for her to call me in, because Jennings was sitting at her desk, dabbing tears from her eyes with a handkerchief. Her gaze widened when she took me in, and several moments of the most uncomfortable silence I’d ever felt fell between us. The woman had feelings. This thought unsettled me.

“I, uh, I’m sorry, ma’am. Excuse me,” I said, and turned to leave.

“Don’t you dare,” said Jennings. “You just had the gall to burst into my office unannounced, so now you can stay and say your piece. I presume you have some sort of speech to make?”

“That’s not why I….”

“Then why did you?” Jennings snapped, and I startled a little.

“I don’t really know. I just wanted to apologise, I suppose, for what Keira was doing, and for laughing. Mostly for the laughing. You don’t deserve that kind of behaviour, and it’s unprofessional on our part.”

Well, maybe she did deserve it just a little, but I wasn’t going to say that to her face.

“Unprofessional behaviour from you is no great surprise, Sheehan. Christ, look at your father.”

I gave her a funny look. “My dad might not be the most pleasant man in the world, but he’s hardly unprofessional.”

Jennings only snorted and dabbed once more at her eyes before tossing her hankie aside. I narrowed my gaze. “What’s the deal with you two anyway?”

She glanced up in surprise. “Pardon?”

“You hate my dad like he murdered your grandmother or something. Why?”

Jennings straightened in her seat. “You have no business asking such questions. Now get back to work.”

“No, I want to know. I’ve never done anything to you, yet you treat me like I’m a piece of dirt on the end of your boot. I deserve to be told the reason.”

A silence fell, and Jennings eyed me shrewdly. “How’s your mother these days?”

Her question seemed a little random, but I answered anyway. “Um, she’s fine.”

“I’ll bet she is,” Jennings muttered, and I wasn’t sure why, but there was something in her tone that I found curious. It was jealousy with a hint of resentment…. Oh, hell no. Suddenly, everything fell into place, and to be honest, it made me feel a little queasy.

“Oh, my God,” I whispered, gaping at her in disbelief. “No way.”

“What are you prattling about?”

“You and my dad.”

Jennings frowned. “Me and your dad, what? Bloody hell, finish you sentences, Sheehan, you’re not a toddler.”

“You and my dad had a thing, didn’t you? Wait, don’t answer that. I don’t want to know.”

She stared, her blue eyes cutting into me like a knife, and all at once I knew it was true. My dad had an affair with Jennings. I felt like I’d just stepped over the threshold and into the twilight zone.

“Your father is a spineless coward,” said Jennings, her voice sober. “He is the worst decision I’ve ever made.”

“Spineless?” My brow furrowed.

“Spineless,” Jennings repeated. “Do you know that I was once beaten so badly by the members of an organised crime ring your father and I were investigating that I almost lost my life? Thugs broke into my home and attacked me, and when your father showed up and ran them off, he refused to give evidence or identify my attackers, because it would result in people discovering that we were conducting an affair. He allowed those men to walk free in order to save his reputation and keep his marriage intact.”

My gut churned again, this time for a very different reason. I wanted to think she was lying, but she had no reason to, and her story didn’t sound made up. In fact, the longer I contemplated it, the more it sounded exactly like something my dad would do.

“Go on, tell me I’m lying,” said Jennings, folding her arms across her chest defensively.

“I believe you,” I whispered, and her eyes flared in shock. A moment passed between us, and I didn’t know what to say. In the end, I went with a simple, “I’m sorry that happened to you. And I’m sorry my dad is spineless coward.”

Because he was. And even though Jennings was no ray of sunshine, no woman deserved to be treated like he’d treated her. She lifted her chin, and we shared a moment of eye contact. Finally, she nodded her acceptance of my apology, and I turned and left her office.

***

By the time I got home from work that evening, I felt emotionally drained. I couldn’t stop thinking about Jennings and my dad, could barely get my head around it, really. He’d cheated on my mum with her, and then did something so abhorrent as to abandon her when she needed him most. At long last, her treatment of me all these years made sense. Hell, if I was Jennings, I’d hate me, too.