Molly, I needed Molly. But after her breakdown this morning, I couldn’t lay this shit on her. Nate was out because he had my kids. That left only one other option. I grabbed my phone and dialed the one friend I could always count on.

“She’s fine, I promise,” Lia told me as she answered her phone. “Try not to worry about her.”

“Lee.” I hated the desperation I couldn’t hide in my voice. “I need you.”

“Where are you?” And just like she had all those years ago, Lia took charge, saving me from myself and handling everything.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

~ Molly ~

They left me alone all day. Emily was very sweet, checking on me every so often, bringing me warm tea with honey and snacks, insisting I needed to eat something. But everyone else stayed away.

I half expected Mike to come barreling through the door, demanding I talk to him the way he usually did. I was positive if I’d told him everything, about Jamie showing up at my sister’s, Eli knowing without telling me, and Jamie’s vow to hurt me, that Mike would have never left me alone. Instead, he would have been glued to my side, barking out orders and never giving me a moment’s peace.

I would tell him. Everything. Later.

Not just the information my sister gave me. I’d tell Mike the secrets I’d been clinging to for years, the ones that only Kevin and I knew. I’d also explain all the things I’d learned from scouring the Internet after they’d left me alone. I’d taken all the information I had and worked backward, piecing together a story that devastated me.

While I’d run away, chasing my dreams and forgetting who I’d been, Kevin had stayed close to home. Maybe he’d been waiting for me to come back like I’d promised I would. Or maybe it was his guilt that kept him there. Or maybe, he’d believed his father’s hateful words and had believed he wasn’t good enough to break the cycle and get out.

It didn’t matter. Because I would never know. I did know that the last time I had seen him would be forever burned into my memory. Tears in his eyes as he walked away, me begging him to stay.

The truth was that I hadn’t told everyone I’d lost the baby. Kevin knew the truth, and he’d shown up that night with a stolen car parked at the end of the road so my mom wouldn’t hear it, and begged me to run away. I’d had a plan, and was going to go eventually, but Kev insisted we had to go right then.

I threw what I could in a bag, and snuck into my parents’ study, taking every cent my mom had stashed in the safe. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to get me by for a little while. I’d vowed to pay her back, tenfold. Then we ran.

The plan was that we would stay together, that we’d go to the shelter in the city and they’d help us find the perfect family for our baby. The closer we got to New York, though, the more Kevin started to second-guess the plan. He was worried about his mom, about his little brother, and he was afraid that if we both disappeared, they would figure it out.

Chances of them finding me, in a city of millions, was slim to none. If we were together, the odds were much smaller. Protecting our baby was the number one priority. So Kevin would go home without us. He assured me that he’d come visit as often as he could. And I swore I would come get him after the baby was born and safe in a new home.

I lost it when it was time for him to go. I begged him to stay with me, not to let me go through it alone. He only shook his head, insisting it was the best thing for everyone, and he promised he’d be back to visit soon. He kissed me, kissed my belly, told me he loved us both, and walked away.

I never saw him again.

I let the tears flow as memories I’d locked away flooded my mind. I often downplayed how much he’d meant to me, but to Georgeanne Davis, Kevin Oakes had meant everything. He was more than my first love, he’d been my best friend.

He’d been my Lia.

I smiled, thinking of Mike. I missed him. He’d only been gone a few hours, but if felt like months. My afternoon of reflection had given me an entirely new outlook on his feelings for Lia, and I suddenly understood exactly what Lia had meant when we talked at the diner. He’d loved her, he would always love her, just as a part of me would always love Kevin, but Lia was his past.

I wanted to be his future.

To do that, I needed to come to terms with my past. I needed to let go of the guilt that constantly tugged at me, and I needed to say goodbye to an old friend that I would carry with me forever. I snatched my guitar and sat on the couch, pouring every ounce of pain I had into a new song.

When Lia came into the room a few hours later, I was still sitting on the couch, guitar across my lap, notepad on the cushion next to me, pencil lodged firmly between my teeth. She arched an eyebrow and smiled softly. “Feeling better?”

“A bit. I wrote a new song. I was hoping I could sing it tonight. It’ll be acoustic, and not something I normally sing, but I need to sing it.”

She sat in the chair across from me. “Are you up to going out there tonight? If you aren’t, say the word and we’ll cancel your performance.”

I was beyond lucky to have a manager who put my needs first. I loved this woman. “Thank you. But I have to go out there, Red. I can’t explain it other than to say I need to.”

“Okay. That’s all you have to say.” She nodded, standing up and walking toward the closet. When she opened it, I realized it was full of the clothes I was supposed to try on today and never got around to. Hangers slid squeakily on the rack as she scanned outfits. “This one.”

She turned, holding up a pair of jeans and a white V-neck tee shirt with a brown-toned plaid. The jeans weren’t the skinny jeans I was used to wearing on stage, and they weren’t the pre-shredded ones, either. The whole outfit wasn’t something I’d normally wear on stage, but for once, I couldn’t wait to get dressed. It wasn’t flashy, it didn’t show off my tattoos, and more of me was covered than not. “It’s perfect.”

“Pair it with you brown cowboy boots,” Lia told me as she draped it over the back of a chair. “People will be able to focus on your music, not you.” She blew me an air kiss as she headed for the door. “I’ll send Randy in. And I’ll let everyone know about the song change. Do you want to close with it, or open with it?”

“Close. I don’t know if I can make it through it without crying.”

Lia twisted her lips in contemplation. “Let’s set it as the encore. You’ll do just that one tonight. That way, you don’t have to go back out afterward, and the audience will have time to compose themselves before Nate takes the stage.” Waving a little, she promised me she’d be back in a bit.

“Hey, Lia?” I called just as the door was about to close behind her, and she peeked her head back in. “I haven’t seen Mike all day.”

“He was going to be sitting around here, worried about you and driving everyone nuts, so I gave him the day off.”

That made sense. “Thank you.” I smiled at my friend, thankful she always saw the big picture. He didn’t get to spend enough time with the kids, so I was glad he’d had the day today. “Will he be back tonight?”

“I honestly don’t know. I didn’t think you’d want to go on, and I just needed him out of here.”

“Oh.” Unnecessary fear crept into my mind and I wondered if I should tell Lia about Jamie.

Reading my body language, Lia came back into the room. “Hey, it’s okay. Sam’s right outside. He’s personally staying with you until Mike comes back. You’re fine.”

I forced myself to breathe and smile. I was fine. It would be fine. “I know. I’m just so used to Mike’s goofy face.”

“Me too,” she said with a laugh and then glanced down at her watch. “I’ve gotta get Randy in here. Twenty minutes ‘til you’re on, kid.” And then she was gone.