Carl disappeared in the direction of the kitchen. For a moment, the three of them sat, blinking at one another through the candlelight. After a second, Veronica shook herself, as if waking herself from a dream. She looked towards the kitchen. Then she shook herself again, more firmly, and reached for the packet of cigarettes lying at the end of the table.

Nicotine lust surged up inside Bella. It was months since she’d even had a drag of a cigarette but all of a sudden, she wanted one, wanted to feel the rusty taste, the smoky rush of it. She reached out for the packet, without thinking.

“What are you doing?”

Caught up in the moment, she took a second to register Jake’s voice. Bella looked at him in the candlelight.

“What?”

“What are you doing?”

“Having a cigarette. What’s it look like I’m doing?”

She caught the edge of Veronica’s smile in the corner of her eye. Jake looked thunderous. She felt a momentary qualm and then another, stronger surge of another emotion - anger.

“You don’t smoke.”

“No, I don’t.”

“So, what the hell are you doing?”

Bella had no answer to that. She had the cigarette in her fingers by then, rolling the little tube between her fingers. Part of her was aghast at her daring. The other part of her thought, quite clearly, fuck him.

The other part won out. She lifted the cigarette to her lips and Veronica sparked the lighter for her, almost as if she’d read her mind. Bella watched Jake’s frown move from her face to Veronica’s.

“Dinner time, guys.”

Carl appeared in the kitchen doorway with a pile of square cardboard boxes in his hands. The three of them looked at him for a moment, dumbfounded. He grinned.

“I said, dinner time. There’s American hot, Hawaiian, and Vegetarian, for the pussies amongst us. Dig in.”

“You what?” said Jake slowly, as if disbelieving his own eyes.

Carl’s grin got wider.

“Come on, guys. I’m an investment banker. You can’t expect me to cook as well.”

“You brought us pizza for our dinner party?”

“Yup.”  Carl’s smile began to fall. “Oh, come on guys. Since when do we give dinner parties? It’s food, isn’t it?”

"How sophisticated," said Veronica, giggling.

Carl grinned. "Well, it's not getting any hotter. Eat up."

Jake rolled his eyes. Bella hesitated for a moment, stubbed out her cigarette, and then reached for a piece. The first bite reminded her of how hungry she was. She took a gulp of wine and it gave her the courage to say 'Carl, I think this is great. Thanks for buying the pizzas."

Carl smiled at her. She was aware again of that pulse of attraction she'd felt before, on first seeing him. I can't be attracted to him though, she told herself, feeling a little sick. He's my boyfriend's brother. She looked from him to Jake, who was watching her look at Carl. His expression was unreadable but she found herself smiling stiffly, hoping her thoughts didn't show on her face. He smiled back, properly, and she felt a rush of love for him. He'd obviously forgiven her for the cigarette. She looked down at it, half smoked in the ashtray.

"Sorry V, but I don't want this anymore. Can I give it back to you?"

Veronica raised her eyebrows but nodded. "Sure. One more for me. Or half at least."

Jake said nothing. Bella caught his eye as she sat back in her seat and saw the look of satisfaction on his face. He gave her the tiniest, approving nod.

Nobody said anything for a moment. The room filled with the sound of chewing and the clink of glasses being set back down on the table. Bella swallowed the last mouthful, took a sip of wine and began to lick her fingers free of grease. After a moment, she realised Carl was watching her do it - saw the smile on his face and blushed tomato-red.

"Sorry," she muttered.

"Don't mind me," said Carl, grinning. "I was quite enjoying it."

Bella felt even hotter. She didn't dare look at Jake.

Veronica cleared her throat.

"More wine, anyone?"

“I’ll have some,” said Bella, just for something to say.

“I think you’ve had enough,” said Jake.

“Oh, leave her alone,” said Carl in a bored tone. “Who died and made you King of the Puritans?”

Veronica gave a nervous giggle. Bella looked quickly towards Jake’s face and nearly flinched. His face was tight with fury. His fingers were clenched about the handle of his knife, the knuckles showing in white bone-chips beneath the taut, translucent skin.

“He’s right,” said Bella wildly, trying to something, anything, to restore calm. “You always have more than you think don’t you - My head’s spinning – definitely think I’ve had a bit much. It was good pizza, though, thanks again Carl for buying it, that was really generous of you – “

She shut her mouth with a snap, realising she was babbling. There was another moment of thrumming silence. Then Veronica scraped her chair back from the table and rose, beginning to collect up the plates and cutlery.

“I’ll help you,” said Bella, frantic to escape the room. She grabbed up her plate and her fork fell clattering to the floor. “Whoops, never mind. I’ll come back for it.”

She almost ran into the kitchen and crashed the crockery down on the sideboard. She was breathing too fast. Veronica came into the kitchen behind her but Bella continued to face the wall, gripping the side of the counter.

She heard the squeak and thud of the dishwasher door open.

“You alright?” said Veronica, as unseen behind her, she began to stack dishes. Bella nodded and then realised she’d have to say something.

“I’m fine.” She took a deep breath, pasted on a smile, and turned around. “I just – it’s just – oh, I don’t know.”

Veronica slotted the last plate into place and lifted the dishwasher door back into place. She put her head on one side.

“What’s up?”

Bella let go of the counter and her hands fell limply to her sides. She shrugged, her inexplicable panic already fading. What was the matter with her?

“I’m fine. Seriously. I think I’ve had a bit too much to drink.”

“Hmm. Want a ciggie?”

Bella shook her head slowly, thinking of what could happen if Jake came out here and found her smoking.

“No, I’m okay, thanks.”

Veronica lit her own cigarette and a long tendril of blue smoke slipped up past her face to the ceiling.

“Well, if you’re sure,” she said and her tone was dismissive. Bella brushed her hair back from her face, her cheeks hot. “Let’s go back in then.”

The boys were sat on either sofa when they got back into the living room. Immediately, Bella could see that the awful tension between them had lessened. What just happened, she wondered. Why did we all freak out? She sat down next to Jake and reached for his hand, tentatively, unsure of whether he was still angry at her. She felt his fingers close around hers and then he turned and smiled at her, a proper smile. She felt weak with relief – her sense of reprieve made her reach out and kiss him. The second their lips touched she wanted to be upstairs in their room, making love and wondered if she dared communicate her need to him, right here and now.

Carl had put some music on and for a while they all sat there in the front room, passing round a joint. Bella felt the smoke gradually seep into her and her muscles melted and softened, sinking her deeper into the sofa, settling her more firmly into Jake’s warm side. The music ebbed and flowed, filling the room and the candles sat in little pools of soft golden light.

Jake sat up, dislodging Bella slightly. She blinked, woken from a luxurious dream.

“Bedtime, I think,” he said and pushed himself from the sofa. Bella blinked again, half asleep.

“This early?” said Carl. Fully awake now, Bella looked at him. He had a slight smile on his face, a smile that somehow made her feel hot and embarrassed.