Before I give Kohen a small tour of the main level, I kick off my shoes because I hate the clicking they make on the marble floor. Besides, Connor’s cleaning lady cleans too well; his floor is slippery. I may or may not have broken my finger slipping on it one time. I point out one of the bathrooms on the way to the kitchen. I fetch beers from the state-of-the-art-fridge before leading him to the living room where the noise is coming from.

From the corner of my eye, I notice Kohen studying the pictures in the hallway. I slow my pace but don’t stop. He admires a black and white painting before striding to my side. He takes in the lavish decor as I lead him around Connor’s bachelor pad.

The guys sit on the black leather couch, playing some sort of shooting video game. Guys. You would think at twenty-eight, Connor would grow up, but you’d be wrong. His place hints at the playboy that I’ve always known him to be. Connor settling down is as likely as me growing another limb.

Dinner runs smoothly. It was a little touch-and-go in the beginning with Logan and Connor interrogating Kohen. Once Twenty Questions were over and they were satisfied I could be interested in a decent guy, dinner becomes relatively normal.

Kohen jokes along with the guys. He even thinks Connor is funny, which surprises me a little. Connor’s sense of humor is a lot like mine. You either love it, or you think he’s an ass. Stealing my last fry, Connor looks innocently at me. Too innocently. Oh no, this isn’t good.

“So Addie must really like you,” Connor says at the same time Logan says, “She’s trying to impress him, Connor.”

“Why do you say that?” Kohen asks.

Logan and Connor wear the purest expressions. I don’t buy it. I scowl at both of them, silently daring them to say something. I have my foot ready. I haven’t kicked either of them all night. That’s a success in my book. The night’s still early, that voice in my head taunts. They nod at each other and have a silent conversation. I hate when they do that. Connor’s grin nearly breaks his face in two. This is bad, very bad.

“Well, she was able to eat her entire burger while being a lady.”

Logan nods in agreement. “Yeah, she didn’t even stuff her face like usual, Connor.”

“She must really like you,” Connor says again.

I’m debating what excuse will get us to leave so they can’t embarrass me any further when Kohen starts laughing with them. I was so consumed by not blushing that I missed Kohen making a mess of himself. I give him a grateful smile when I see the remains of his burger all over his face.

“Touché, you two are perfect for each other.” Logan winks at me.

Connor picks some action movie that I’ve never heard of. Not surprisingly, it has the same plot of most movies about secret agents. Kohen and I sit together on one couch while the guys take the much bigger one. Kohen circles his arm around me and I lean into him.

I keep pretending that I don’t notice every time Connor glances over, but I do. Each time I feel guilty and I feel as if I’m doing something wrong. I can’t shake this feeling that I need to put some distance between Kohen and me. Logan comments to Kohen about the last scene. I can’t even pretend to know what they’re talking about so I tune them out. I stopped paying attention to the movie five minutes into it. Connor’s scrutinizes me again. I force myself to ignore him and focus on the movie, but it’s no use.

I stare down Connor, wondering why he’s watching my every move. He gives me a sympathetic look and it becomes crystal clear why he’s watching every interaction of my date. The lightbulb goes off.

Jax.

I hold in my humorless laugh. Everything leads back to the one guy who doesn’t love me. I nestle closer into Kohen because I’m not going to second guess everything I do with someone who actually likes me. As I concentrate on the movie, Kohen runs his fingertips along my shoulder and down my arm. If I didn’t feel guilty using Kohen as a distraction, I would enjoy his simple defiance of my brother and Connor. He doesn’t seem to mind touching me in front of them. I hate that I want to push him away from me because I feel as if I’m cheating on Jax.

As the end credits roll, I mentally curse myself for falling in love with the damaged boy who trusted me to take care of him when he used to sneak into my bedroom growing up. Ignoring the questioning look Logan sends my way, I rise and collect my purse. I plaster on a fake smile when I face the guys. For the first time tonight, I’m glad Jax isn’t here. He would be able to see right through me, and that’s not something I want or need right now.

“Ready to head out?” I ask Kohen.

I can tell my mood change catches him off guard, but he recovers quickly. “Absolutely.” He assures my brother, “I’ll make sure she gets home safely.”

Logan shakes his offered hand. “Alone,” he says in a brotherly tone that isn’t necessary.

I could die of mortification.

Connor rescues Kohen from any more brotherly advice by smoothly slapping Logan on the back of the head. “What Logan means is, thank you for making sure Addie gets home safely.”

Kohen forces out a laugh. “Yeah . . . no problem.”

They escort us to the elevators and before Logan decides to join us, I rush to hug him and then Connor.

“Give it time,” Connor whispers into my ear.

The cab ride to our building is long and awkward. Every time things start to get normal between us again, an image of Jax pops into my head, shattering our conversation. I tell myself it’s because I haven’t seen him in forever and I miss my friend. As the car pulls up to the curb, I almost sigh in relief.

Once we’re in the elevator, I look up to apologize for my bipolar behavior, but the words stick in my throat. Kohen watches me with his dark, stormy eyes. Since words are nonexistent at this point, I try for another tactic. I lean up on my tiptoes and kiss him. His kiss is nothing like Jax’s. Where Jax is passionate, Kohen is tender. I break away from the kiss as soon as I realize that I’m comparing the two.

Breathless Kohen, seems influenced by our kiss. His eyes are full of desire. I want to throw up. This is wrong and unfair to him. Luckily the elevator gods decide to have pity on me. They finally stop at my floor.

“Next time it will be a real date.” I step out.

“I’ll hold you to that. Good night, Adalynn.”

I make it back to my apartment and sink to the floor. Why am I still obsessed with Jax after all this time? Why can’t I just move on? Why can’t I even remember the sensation from Kohen’s lips on mine? Forcing myself off the floor, I concentrate on getting ready for bed.

Three weeks have flown by since that unforgettable dinner at Connor’s. Liv is a thorn in my butt that I can’t shake . . . not like I really want to, anyway. I’ve been seeing the change in myself and I won’t jeopardize my progress. Kohen has become a permanent fixture in my life. We usually have dinner together unless he’s working. Connor and Logan, Yankees season pass holders, invited him to a game. Liv seems pleased that I’m dating, she just cautions me to take it slow.

Luckily Kohen treats me with extreme patience. Which is great because every time things get interesting between us, I think of Jax. I have to concentrate on removing Jax from my mind, total mood killer. Kohen thinks I’m just not ready to take the next logical step in our . . . whatever we are . . . but the truth is I don’t want to do anything with him that I will regret. I have a sinking feeling that if I’m with him, I’ll be thinking of Jax. So until I no longer have to force my thoughts off Jax, I can’t take that much needed next step. It’s unfair to Kohen.

Jax avoids me at all costs. I’m not even worth the effort for him to nod in greeting. I hate that he’s ignoring me. Sure, when I’m at the office he mumbles two words to me in passing if someone is around. I learned pretty fast to give up on conversation. If he doesn’t want to talk to me, fine, I’m not going to beg him. I’m not a dog. Jax makes excuse after excuse so he isn’t forced to be around me. It’s a good thing Connor is aware of what’s going on because he helps me distract Logan.