“No,” I answer, shaking my head.

“Too bad.” she shrugs her shoulders.

“I said no. I’m their guardian.”

“Kailey, they need a change. They need something to look forward to. To get out of this house and not be reminded of everything they lost. Maybe you want to continue to wallow in grief, but it’s not fair to them.”

Taken back, I cock my head, surprised she’s pointing the finger at me. I wasn’t the driver who smashed into the ambulance. I’m not the one who gave Jen cancer. All I’ve done is continued our normal schedule. The kids do everything like they did before their parents died. It’s not like I lay in my bed all day feeling sorry for myself. Well, maybe a little.

“That boy loves those kids and you too, if you’d just open your damn eyes you’d realize it. His mom called me and invited all of us, including you, which is more than I can say I would do from the way you’ve treated her son.” I release a deep breath from exhaustion of her attitude with me.

“Fine. Go. I’ll stay here.” I shout at her while I walk up the stairs. A memory suddenly floods to mind of the fights I had with Jen when I was sixteen. Oh, how I miss her.

When I get to my room, I slam the door like a teenager and flop down on my bed. Anger rising within me, the nerve that she’s taking the kids away, and with Trey. My phone dings in my pocket, and I pull it out.

Trey: Please think about coming. It would be good to get away. Love, your little drummer boy. Although, there’s nothing little about me. ;)

Tossing the phone into my pillow, I let my head fall down onto my crossed arms. The ache that occupies my body is for Trey. I’ve been dreaming about him every night. The feel of his warm arms wrapped around me. There’s no way, I can be in a car with him for three hours, but at the same time there’s no way I can’t. The pull to him is too strong, and he’s weakened me these past weeks as much as I hate to admit it.

Already accepting I should be packing my bag another text comes through.

Trey: Not even a LOL or smiley? Give me something.

The smallest smile starts to form. Damn him.

Me:  LOL. Happy now?

Trey: I won’t be happy until you agree to come. Come on my cat girl.

Say no, say no.

Me: Fine.

Trey: Pack a skimpy bikini. Wait, strike that. Bring a one piece too. The bikini will be for the midnight swims with just you and me.

Uh, the audacity of him to think just because I’m agreeing to go, I’ll be skinny dipping with him in the middle of the night.

Me: Don’t get any ideas. I’m not going to be skinny dipping with the likes of you.

Trey: Look has the dirty mind now. I said bikini, not naked. But hey, I’m sure you can persuade me. I’m leaving my house, so pack that bag because I’m coming to get ALL of you.

Just like that the butterflies swarm within my stomach, and the anticipation of being near him grows more intense. Jesus, Kailey, you have no self-control. You’ve held off for the past two weeks, and now you’re just going to give in. What the hell is wrong with you? You love him that’s what.

Trey arrives fifteen minutes later. I barely have everything packed by the time he’s at my bedroom door. He leans against the doorframe so cocky and sure of himself, bearing that flirtatious smirk. “Did you pack it?” he slyly asks.

“Maybe,” I playfully respond, shrugging my shoulders.

He comes into the room and grabs my bag from the bed. When he passes by me, his hand grazes mine and goose bumps spread like wildfire up my arm.

“I just want to make something clear, Trey. This doesn’t change anything. You still need to move on with your life.” His eyes drop, and he takes a long breath before they open again.

“Got it.” His lips turn up into a smile.

We climb into the van, all the kids in the back row, and Holly and I in the second row with Trey and Clyde up front. Holly pats my knee and smiles at me, obviously deliriously happy that I changed my mind.

Three hours, two bathroom breaks, and an hour filled with whining later, we arrive at Trey’s parents’. It’s an enormous two-story brick house set back on a lot of empty land. Classic and modern all rolled into one. With tons of windows and black trim, it’s stunning to look at. The lines are sleek but jagged. Whoever designed it had a keen eye for architecture, that’s for sure.

Trey parks the van in front of the four-car garage, and all of us are eager to escape the confined space. “I forgot what it’s like to travel with children,” Holly says to me and just shrugs. I want to remind her she’s the one who was so keen on this little road trip, but this will be uncomfortable as it is, I’ll need her as an ally not an enemy.

Trey and Clyde carry the bags, but before we open the door it busts open with Elena standing in the doorway. Seriously, do these people have magic powers? Have they ever heard of letting some knock before answering? “Hi, everyone. Welcome.” She throws the door open all the way and signals us to come in. Anxiety builds inside of me that maybe I’m not really welcome, but of course she quickly proves me wrong.

Once I’m through the door, she squeezes me tightly just like her son always does. “Welcome, Kailey.” Her arms bring a warmth around me, almost chipping away some coldness. I nod and clench my teeth, so I don’t break down.

Elena makes a huge pot of spaghetti with homemade meatballs for dinner. We sit on the patio that overlooks acres of land. The kids play in the yard, Chloe does cartwheels, Tara somersaults, and Drew just running in circles. It’s nice to see them so happy and carefree, like children should be. Not that they aren’t at home, but Aunt Holly was right, they needed to get out of that house and Western. Damn, I hate it when she’s right.

“Kailey, will you help me?” Elena asks, taking the dishes into the kitchen.

I automatically stand, kicking myself for not offering first. Trey rises to his feet to help. “Trey, you stay. I only need Kailey. We’ll be right back.” She smiles, and I look at Aunt Holly with fear of what I’m in for.

Elena is already at the counter, placing desserts on the tray to take out. She shuffles with such grace from the cabinets to the counter and back again. I wonder if she was a dancer at one time in her life. After she places everything on the tray we need to take, I scoop up a stack of plates and turn around hopeful to escape. “Kailey, can we have a quick moment to talk?” I close my eyes take a deep breath and turn her way again with a perfectly wide smile encased across my mouth.

“Of course.” I go back, and she signals for me to scoot the stool out. My eyes are darting everywhere but at her.

“I know this is hard for you. Although I’ve never lost anyone so close to me, as you have. I imagine it’s unbearable.” She pats my hand.

“We’re managing, but thank you for your concern.” I act nothing short of polite.

“Trey’s been through a lot,” she starts, and I just want to roll my eyes. Here’s the mother bird protecting her helpless baby.

“I know.”

“Don’t get me wrong, he’s been no saint. But I can tell you he loves you, and I hope that you can see you’re hurting both of you.” She gives me a small smile and turns around.

“I just don’t want to force him into taking care of us. It’s my love for him that has me pushing him away. Please, don’t confuse it for anything, but me wanting the best for him.” I’m even surprised by myself that I’m revealing my fucked up feelings to her so fast.

“That’s admirable, honey.” Oh good, she’s on my side. “But, it’s not your decision to make if Trey wants to be a part of yours and the kids’ life. It’s his. If I know my son, he’s made his decision, so it’s only you that’s making him unhappy at this point.” Her lips tighten and she pats my hand. “I am sorry for your losses, Kailey, but you are here still. Make the most of your short time, be happy. If Trey is it, don’t push him anymore, embrace him. Don’t let your fears determine his future.” She scoops up the tray and walks back outside. “Could you bring those plates on your way?” She asks as though she didn’t just give me a nice kick in the ass.