“It’s fine. I’m used to it…well…not really, but I know I don’t really fit in here,” I say quietly, keeping my head down as I shuffle my feet back and forth on the cracked cement sidewalk. The truth is I am or was a wasp. Before I came to this school, I attended the finest college on the eastern shore. My parents are wasps, my friends are wasps, and their parents are wasps.

“Hey, Rob’s an asshole. Don’t let him get to you.” He places his finger under my chin, bringing me up to meet his face. “You owe me a dinner and I plan on making you pay.” He grabs my hand and leads me to his car.

Fifteen minutes later, we are off campus and downtown at some dive diner off the highway. When we enter there are a few older men at the counter, but all the booths are open. Brady lets me pick the table so I choose one in the back corner. A waitress in her fifties with her hair pulled back in a bun and wearing a pink and white dress and an apron comes over, handing us menus.

“Hi, Brady,” she says, glancing from him to me. “Who is your friend?” she smiles.

“This is Sadie,” he answers, holding his hand out toward me. “Sadie, this is Jacks.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sadie.” She puts out her hand for me to shake and I oblige.

“It’s nice to meet you too,” I concur, noticing her name tag actually reads Jackie. Brady seems to shorten everyone’s names.

“So, you two, what will it be?” Jackie asks, taking out her pencil and paper.

“Do you mind if I order for you?” Brady questions, shy and hesitant, so I nod. “Thanks,” he responds. “We will have two of my usual, Jacks.” He grabs our menus and hands them to her.

“Sounds good,” Jackie says before walking away.

I have never been to a diner in my life. The decorated black and white vinyl booths with red piping flows nicely with pictures of vintage cars and past actors and actresses from a time before I was born. The older men are engrossed in their own conversation regarding some sports game, leaving Brady and me to ourselves.

“So, what did you think of the show?” Brady relaxes back into the booth, stretching one arm along the top of the booth and his other arm out resting on the table.

“It was good,” I answer, smiling over at him.

“How about awesome or incredible? How about you couldn’t keep your eyes off the lead singer?” he jokes.

“You are a really good singer,” I admit.

“That’s it? That’s all you have to say?” He leans forward in his seat, eager to hear more.

“Well…I do have one question.” I tap my finger to my bottom lip.

“Yeah?”

“Is the drummer single?” I grin up to him.

“Oh man, I think you just broke my heart.” He puts his hand over his chest, sighing.

“Seriously though, how come you didn’t play any of the love songs from the album you gave me?”

“First of all, I have never written a love song. Second, our band has a certain reputation and that doesn’t include the slower…more…emotional songs.”

His response confuses me. Those songs were about losing someone and being left alone. Did he just lie to me again? That would mean two times in just a few hours.

“I think your fans would like your slower songs. I fell completely in love with them,” I confess.

“Really? That means a lot.” Brady appears surprised by my reaction to his music. “I don’t usually share…” He stops when Jackie interrupts us with our food.

“Here you guys go.” She sets down two chocolate milkshakes, two cheeseburgers with fries, and a plate full of nachos in the middle.

“I’m never going to finish this,” I tell him after she walks away.

“Wait until you taste this food.” He pops a fry into his mouth and smiles from ear to ear.

After the meal, my stomach is so bloated I think the button of my pants might pop off. Brady tells me how he’s been coming here since he was little. He grew up in this town and has lived his whole life here. I keep him in the dark regarding my past, telling him I went to Western Colorado and my family resides there as well. I can’t fault him for lying since I am too.

I go to the bathroom after the meal, leaving Brady to chat with Jackie about someone they both know. I stare at myself in the mirror, applying the lip gloss that the food and shake rubbed off. My hair has fallen limp and straight so I pull it back in a low ponytail. Straightening my blouse out, I venture back out to the booth. Jackie’s gone and Brady is doing something with his phone.

“Did you enjoy the meal?” He puts his phone away and peers up to me.

“I did. I can’t believe I ate that much,” I declare, observing my half-eaten burger with no fries left and an empty milkshake.

“I might have overdone it with the nachos,” he admits, chuckling. “Are you ready?” He scoots out of the booth, waiting for me.

“Where’s the bill?” I grab my purse, scooting out myself.

“Oh, I took care of it already.” He grins up to me.

“I was supposed to pay,” I exclaim, narrowing my eyes.

“Sorry, I forgot.” He jokingly shrugs his shoulders. “I guess you will just have to treat me another time. Actually, twice now.” He laughs.

“Brady Carsen, did you set me up?”

“Maybe.” He raises his eyebrows up to me. “It’s not in me to let a lady pay.”

“Goodnight, you two,” Jackie says, waving from behind the counter.

“Bye, Jacks. Thanks for everything,” Brady responds and waves back.

“Nice to meet you, Jackie,” I say in return.

“You too, sweetie,” she replies.

Brady opens the door for me and I watch him make his way to his side of the car. He is so different than what I’m used to as are the feelings he invokes in me. I’m at ease with him, as though I would walk away from the life I know and be content to spend my remaining days with him. Holy Shit, what the hell, Sadie?

When he settles in the car, he looks over at me and I see it on his face. His desire is clear as he gazes at my eyes and then my lips and back up to my eyes again. I see his hand moving up to my cheek. Oh I want this, I want nothing more than his lips on mine. He leans in, closing the gap between us. Just as he licks his lips, I abruptly turn around toward the window. I close my eyes as I continue to face the passenger window, ignoring what just happened.

Brady sighs before he puts the key in the ignition and drives out of the parking lot. I don’t think I have to worry about him pursuing me further; I’m sure I just put a stop to that. I did the right thing, right? Could I have stopped at just a kiss? I have never stopped there.

He pulls up outside my dorm and I open the door before he can put the car in park. I can’t face him; I’m embarrassed how I reacted. It was just a kiss. I didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want to if got more heated.

“Sadie,” he yells over to me. I’m already at my dorm doors.

I ignore him and walk through the doors. Some guy comes out as I go in and I hear Brady ask him to hold the door, which the guy does. Thanks a lot buddy.

“Sadie, hold up,” Brady calls out, catching up to me at the next set of doors.

“What?” I ask with my back turned to him, staring at the ground.

“Look at me,” he requests softly. Lucky for me no one else is around. I’m sure they’re still out enjoying their Friday night.

“I can’t,” I whisper.

He walks up to face me, putting his hands on my arms. “Please,” he begs.

I reluctantly look up through my eyelashes and see that he isn’t mad that I didn’t kiss him. Only concern fills his eyes and face.

“Why are you running away from me? I thought we had a pretty good date.”

“I’m sorry, Brady. You shouldn’t waste your time on me.”

“Tell me you feel this. Tell me it’s not just me.”

“Brady,” I sigh. “You don’t understand. It doesn’t matter what I feel. I can’t do this.” I shake my head.

“Don’t walk away from this, Sadie.” His eyes bore into mine. “I know we look different from the outside, but it’s the inside that counts,” he argues. He thinks I don’t want to be with him because of our outward differences, but the truth is he’s too good a person for me.