“I have to pull out now,” he muttered and slowed down.

I groaned and shook my head. “Please, not yet.”

“I can’t stop myself,” he groaned as I closed my legs and backed into him. “I’m going to come.”

“Please, not yet,” I moaned passionately. “I’m so close.”

“I’ll have to go slow.” His fingers started rubbing me quickly as his cock started moving slowly. His cock felt hard and deep in me, and I wiggled back against him and slowly moved my hips.

“No, Riley,” he whispered and grabbed my hips. “Please, stop for a second.”

“You guys okay?” Justin’s voice halted us both still and I froze as I saw him walking towards us.

“Yeah, why?” Hudson responded impatiently.

“Just heard you whispering. Thought you were arguing.” He looked down at us with squinty eyes. “Just wanted to make sure.”

“We’re fine,” Hudson grunted, and I tried not to laugh as I wiggled against him. His hand flew to my stomach to try and stop me from moving, but I couldn’t stop myself.

“Tomorrow should be fun, right?” Justin continued, and Hudson didn’t hold back his groan. “What did you say?” Justin asked.

“Nothing.” Hudson’s voice was hoarse, and I ground back into him. “Stop,” he hissed in my ear, but I couldn’t. I was too excited.

For some reason, I was feeling even hornier and turned on. I reached my hand between my legs and started playing with myself. Then I felt him sliding slowly in and out of me.

“You excited about the final fight?” Justin continued, and I nearly laughed.

“Yeah,” Hudson sighed, and I felt him increase his pace slightly.

“Okay, I guess you’re sleepy.” Justin sounded disappointed that Hudson hadn’t said more and walked away.

“Idiot,” Hudson whispered in my ear and I laughed. “You’re a bad girl, Riley.”

His fingers went to the front of me and he gasped as he realized I was pleasuring myself. His fingers met mine and I guided them along my sex. He started moving his cock in and out of me faster, and within a minute, I felt my muscles clenching down on him as I came.

“Oh shit.” Hudson grabbed my hips and slammed in and out of me, grunting into my shoulder as his body trembled. I felt his body still and he pulled out quickly. I felt his warm sperm on my legs and butt. “Shit,” he groaned as he lay back.

“What’s wrong?” I turned towards him and kissed him.

“I may have pulled out too late.” His eyes looked worried, and I stroked his face.

“It’ll be okay.”

“I’m sorry.” He shook his head. “I should have known better.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I don’t suppose you’re on the pill, are you?”

“I am.” I nodded and giggled at the look of confusion in his eyes. “My doctor prescribed it to help regulate my period.”

“Oh.” He sighed and then smiled. “You should have told me.”

“You never asked.” I smiled, and he growled.

“Come here.” He opened his arms and I snuggled into his chest. “You feel so soft and warm.”

“So do you.”

“I can’t believe we did this.” He shook his head and held me tight. “I didn’t deserve to get another night with you.”

“Maybe we’re just meant to be together.”

“I don’t deserve you.” He buried his face into my neck. “I don’t deserve to be happy.”

“Everyone deserves to be happy,” I said sleepily as I closed my eyes.

“Sinners don’t,” he whispered next to me as I fell asleep.

I heard someone’s phone ringing as I slept, but I was so exhausted and happy that I didn’t bother opening my eyes. I didn’t even stir when Hudson got out of the sleeping bag. I knew that he was just going to the bathroom or something. I lay on that sleeping bag content as could be, all worries gone from my mind. Everything is going to be okay, I thought to myself as I hugged my secret in. Everything is going to be okay.

It took me about thirty minutes to realize that I was wrong. My eyes popped open and I lay there feeling worried and alone. Hudson hadn’t come back from his bathroom trip. I looked to the side and realized that his bag was gone. He’d left me. He’d gone. Everything in my world was black again. Once again, I was the girl who had killed his girlfriend or was at least responsible for her death and I was never going to be able to stop paying for it.

Hudson

Present Day

The bus stop was in a desolate location. A location that fit my mood. I stood there waiting with panic and anxiety running through my veins, though it was the guilt that pervaded me the most. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and called the hospital.

“Mercy Hospital, how may I direct your call?”

“I’m calling to check on a patient,” I quickly said into the phone.

“Sir, we can’t give out privileged information over the phone.”

“Jamilah Brown is her name!” I shouted. “I need to know if she’s okay!”

“Sir, I’m afraid you will have to come into the hospital.”

“What do you think I’m trying to do?” I shouted and hung up the phone angrily. I felt sick to my stomach as I stood there. If Jamilah didn’t make it, I would never forgive myself.

I wondered what I should have done to prevent this. I’d told Jamilah not to swim in the pool by herself. She’d promised me that she wouldn’t do it. Should I have told her mom? I hadn’t wanted her to get banned from swimming altogether, and she had promised me. She’d promised me she wouldn’t go without me.

But you can’t be there all the time, Hudson.

I closed my eyes as I thought about her in the pool. She’d gotten a cramp, her mom had said when she’d called crying. She’d gone swimming late at night and gotten a cramp in her legs in the deep end. She’d swallowed a lot of water. She’d nearly drowned. My heart stopped for a moment. I didn’t know what that meant. I didn’t know if she was okay. If she died, I didn’t know what I would do.

It’s a sign, a voice whispered inside of me. It’s a sign that you shouldn’t be with Riley.

Every time I slept with her, something bad happened. I knew the universe was telling me that I didn’t deserve her. She was too pure and innocent for me. She was good, while I was bad. That didn’t mean I would stop loving her. It just meant I had to start resisting her.

Making love to her tonight had been like heaven on earth. It had felt even better than the first time. I’d felt like I’d gone home again. She’d fit against me so perfectly. For a few minutes, everything in my life had seemed like it was going to be okay. If I closed my eyes and stood perfectly still, I could still smell her. That smell of sex and sin mixed together made my blood boil over. I hadn’t known that one woman could affect me so deeply. I knew in my heart that there would never be anyone else for me. Riley was the one. She had always been the one. I felt tears rolling down my eyes as I realized I had to let her go.

The bus pulled up around twenty minutes later and I jumped on it, making my way to a window seat. I stared out the window and wondered what it was I had done wrong in life to put me in this position. Then I felt mad because I was feeling sorry for myself. I still had my life. I still had my family. I’d had a pretty charmed life growing up.

My thoughts turned to Jamilah and the life she had being a latchkey kid, having to look after her brother. I should have done more. I could have tried harder. I should have been there for her. My heart thudded as I thought about her eager face and smile. All she wanted was to make it to the Olympics. We’d all had dreams like that at one point in time. I just wished she hadn’t gone in that pool at night. If only I hadn’t gone on the camping trip, then I could have been at home and taken her to the pool myself. I could have taken care of her.

The bus ride seemed to take forever, but that’s how it always was when you needed to get somewhere important. The ride seemed slow or the traffic was always crazy. I ran from the bus stop to the hospital. I ran as fast as I could and I didn’t stop, even though it was about two miles away. I knew that I couldn’t be that close and wait for another bus.