consuming and obliterating all thoughts, all conversation.

welcome it. Dropping the empty bottle by the door, step

into the throng.

Anonymous faces crowd in as Andy weaves us

through the room, past flashes of blond hair and glittering

earrings; heavy-lidded goths and pouting lip gloss; flesh,

piercings, bottles, lines of shots, shrieks of laughter and,

permeating it all, the unmistakable smell of weed.

“You want something to eat?” Andy mouths.

shake my head, reaching instead for one of the

shots. down it easily, barely feeling the sting as it slides

22

down my throat. reach for another, but Andy catches my

arm, pointing over my shoulder. “Hey, there’s Bex!”

turn and squint into the crowd, but the dark mass

of writhing bodies twine into each other anonymously.

turn back to Andy, confused, and am suddenly shoved

headfirst into his shoulder, beer slopping over my back.

“Hey!” Andy pushes the guy who knocked me.

“Watch it, okay?”

The guy staggers away and collapses on sofa.

“Ow …,”

moan quietly, the taste of fresh blood

salty on my tongue, the scent of Andy’s aftershave tickling

my nose.

Andy looks down at me, concerned. “You okay?” He

brushes my lips carefully with his thumb, and my head

swims with more memories.

“You’re soaked!” He grins, wiping beer from my

hair.

“Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.”

Apart from pile of jackets, the bathroom is empty,

the faint thud thud thud pulsing distantly through the floorboards. Andy grabs damp cloth and starts to gently

clean my cut, his brow furrowed in concentration as he

leans closer, making me dizzy. He cups my cheek and my

skin blazes, my heart pounding as his eyes meet mine.

Without thinking, lean forward and press my lips

against his.

He pulls back, surprised. “Rosie—” search his eyes

anxiously, his gaze deep in mine.

23

Then suddenly we’re kissing, the taste of his soft

lips so sweet and familiar, my heart thumping frantically

against my ribs.

God, haven’t been kissed— haven’t been touched— in so, so long …

press closer, the kisses deepening, lengthening, as

my mind spins into oblivion, my body on fire.

This is it. This is what need. To escape. To just lose

myself completely. To forget …

kiss him harder, pushing my chest against his, my

hand moving to his zip.

“Mm …,” Andy groans.

tug at the little metal pull.

“Rosie …”

push closer, my tongue sliding against his as slip

my hand inside

“Rose, no—Rosie!” He pushes me away, my lips

stinging in the empty air.

“I’m sorry,” he sighs, running his hands through his

hair. “I’m sorry, can’t

can’t do this.”

“What?” blink, his face swimming in front of mine.

“Why? What’s wrong?”

He looks away and

frown, trying to search his

eyes, but they won’t keep still, won’t focus.

“Andy?”

“Rosie,

just

can’t.” He looks at me, his eyes

pained, then looks away, sighs.

Then realize.

24

“You don’t want me.” swallow painfully, my throat

sour as shiver, cold suddenly. “You never did.”

“Rosie, no, that’s not what I—”

push past him, my chest tight, the room blurring

as stagger for the door.

“Rose, wait—” He reaches for me

“Get off me!” wrench away, reeling as lurch into

the corridor.

There are bodies everywhere—leaning against

walls and sprawled over the floor, yelling at me as

stumble over their limbs, my own legs threatening to

buckle at any moment. clutch at the wall, feeling my way

along, trying to keep going, stay upright, get out of here,

breathe

Suddenly the wall ends.

feel myself falling and

can’t stop. wince, ready for the slamming pain. But it

never comes.

“Whoa there, tiger.”

guy’s face swims in front of

mine as he pulls me upright and he leans me back against

the wall.

“You okay? Nearly had little fall there.”

“Another one falling for you, Kyle?” his friend jokes.

Kyle laughs, and hear myself join in. He takes

swig of beer, then offers me the bottle. take it eagerly—

too fast—the glass crashing against my teeth as the cool

liquid slops down my front. Kyle laughs, and smile up at

him, licking my lips, the taste of beer bitter and cool in my

mouth.

25

“What’s your name, anyway?” he asks, brushing my

hair out of my eyes. “Do know you?”

“I …”

try to concentrate, but his face keeps

swimming out of focus. “Um

Ro …”

“Ro?” He has dimples when he smiles. “Well, Ro,” he

says, leaning in closer, “you’ve got very pretty eyes.”

He moves to tuck my hair behind my ear, and

suddenly I’m kissing him, hard. He smiles in surprise, then

kisses me back hungrily, pressing his body against mine.

My head bangs violently against the wall, but the pain is

welcome, the kisses rough, desperate, his stubble

scratching my cheeks, his tongue writhing in my mouth.

His grip tightens, and clutch fiercely at his back, my eyes

screwed shut, blotting out everything else.

Suddenly he’s ripped away, my lips burning as

gasp for air.

“Hey! What’s your problem, Andy?” Kyle snarls.

Andy. Shit

“Leave her alone, Kyle.”

“It was her! Couldn’t keep her hands off me.”

Andy grabs my arm. “Come on.”

“Hey.” Kyle stops him. “She’s big girl, Hunter, she

can do what she wants.” He winks at Andy. “And she

wants me.”

“She’s had too much to drink.”

“What are you, her mother?”

wince.

“Just

Leave her alone, okay?” Andy says.

“What’s it to you?” Kyle challenges.

26

“I said”—Andy steps closer—“leave her—”

“Yeah, Andy,” hear myself slur. “What’s it to you?”

Andy stops. He’s looking at me, but can’t see his

eyes.

Kyle laughs. “Oh, dear, Hunter. Seems you’re not

needed after all. Do us all

favor, eh, mate? Get

life.”

Kyle drapes his arm round my shoulders. “Come on,

sweetheart, let’s find somewhere we won’t be disturbed.”

He pushes past Andy.

“Wait.” Andy catches my arm.

“Back off, Hunter!”

“Rose,” Andy says. “Rose, look at me.”

stare at the floor.

“Rosie!”

“Whoa—hold on

minute.” Kyle’s arm drops from

my shoulder. “Rosie? Wait, you’re Rosie Kenning?” He

swipes my hair from my eyes and peers down at me.

“Jeezus Christ.” He smirks. “Now, what’s Crazy Kenning’s

daughter doing on the loose?”

What? My face burns.

“Hey everyone! It’s Crrrazy Kenning’s kid!”

“Kyle!” Andy grabs him, and Kyle holds up his hands

in mock surrender.

“Hey, she’s all yours, Hunter. My mistake, mate.” He

staggers off along the corridor, drunkenly toppling from

one wall to the other. “Should’ve recognized her by her

walk, eh, lads? Just like her old lady—remember the

prom?”

They

laugh

and

whoop

appreciatively.

27

“Whoaoaoa! And as for that fall—whoops!” Kyle falls into

chubby guy’s waiting arms. “Classic trademark.”

“I …” can’t think. Can’t breathe.

“Sorry, sweetheart.” He dances over and slings his

arm round my neck. “Nothing personal. You’re very cute,