"That would be lovely," she said, but she didn't sound convinced.
"And you?" Martin asked.
"A new Earth," she said. "I know that's foolish. All the Earth-like worlds are probably taken, but perhaps the moms could send us to a place where nobody has been, find a planet where we could be alone. Where we could make a new Earth."
"And have children," he said. "Where the moms could let us have children."
"No moms," Theresa said. "Just ourselves."
Martin considered this, saw nations arising, people disagreeing, history raising its ugly head, the inevitable round of Eden's end and reality's beginning. But he did not tell Theresa what she already knew. Fantasies were almost as important as fuel at this point.
"Do you think they'll know when they die?" Theresa asked. Martin understood whom she meant. Down at the bottom of the gravity well, on the planets. The Killers.
"If they're still alive…" Martin said, raising his eyebrows. "If there's anybody still there, still conscious… not a machine."
"Do you think they can be conscious if they've become machines?"
"The moms don't tell us about such things," Martin said.
"Can they be guilty if they're just machines now?"
"I don't know," Martin said. "They can be dangerous."
"If there are a few still in bodies, still livingas we do, do you think they are… leaders, prophets… or just slaves?"
"Machines don't need slaves," Martin said, grinning.
Theresa shook her head. "That's not what I mean. I mean slaves to their own bodies. The others might be so much more free, immortal, able to think and do whatever they please. Haven't you ever felt as if you were a slave to your body?"
Martin shook his head. "I don't think so."
"Having to urinate every few hours, shit every day or two or three… Eat."
"Make love," Martin said.
"Have periods," Theresa said.
Martin touched her arm.
"I've never had a period," she said. "I've grown up, but they've taken that away from me."
"The Wendys don't seem to miss them," Martin said.
"How would we know?"
"My mother didn't miss them on the Ark," he said. "She told me she was glad." Has she had any children since we left… on Mars? He had never thought of having brothers or sisters he would never know.
"What if they were thinking very deeply, solving very large problems, just working all the time, without worrying about bodies?"
"No passions, no sorrows," Martin said, trying to stay in tune with her musing.
"Maybe they feel very large passions, larger than we can know. Passions without physical boundaries. Curiosity. Maybe they've come to actually lovethe universe, Martin. "
"We don't know anything about them, except that they're quiet," Martin said.
"Are they frightened?" she asked. "Hoping not to be noticed?"
Martin shrugged. "It's not worth thinking about," he said.
"But all the strategists say we should know our enemies, be prepared for anything they might do by knowing what they must do, what they needto do."
"I hope they die before they even know we're here," Martin said.
"Do you think that's possible?"
He paused, shook his head, no.
"Do you think they already know?"
Shook his head again, acutely uncomfortable.
"We have an hour before you go back," Theresa said. "Pan must take his scheduled free time, too. To be healthy."
"I wouldn't deny myself that. Or you," Martin said.
"Let's love," Theresa said. "As if we were free, and our own people."
And they tried. It worked, partly. At the very least it was intense, even more intense than in their first few days together.
"When I'm free," Martin said, as they floated beside each other in the darkness, "I will choose you."
"I amfree," Theresa said. "For this minute, I'm free as I'll ever be. And I choose you."
One hour before partition, Rosa stood in the schoolroom, next to the star sphere, less than twelve meters from the silent War Mother. Her eyes were heavy lidded, head bowed. Her hands shook slowly like leaves in a small breeze. She was naked but for a scarf tied around her neck. Dull light from the star sphere limned her pale skin.
Liam Oryx came into the schoolroom looking for Hakim, saw her, and immediately called Martin on his wand. He also called Ariel.
Martin arrived with Theresa, but William had gotten there first. William approached Rosa slowly, saying nothing.
"I don't need you," Rosa told him.
"Something wrong?" Ariel called from behind William. "Rosa?"
"I've seen it again," Rosa said. "There's something in the ship with us. It spoke to me. I can't stop seeing things that are real."
William stopped three meters from where she stood, beside the War Mother, which did not speak or move. "What did it say?" he asked.
Martin bit his lip, watching, his stomach sinking. So little time. Every child precious.
Theresa climbed around the schoolroom, hovered beside Ariel. Other children arrived until finally fifteen occupied the chamber, all Rosa's Tree family and five others besides.
"What did it say?" William repeated.
"It's alive," Rosa said. "It lives out here, and it sees and hears things we can't. It's very large. I think it might be a god. Sometimes it hates us, sometimes it loves us."
Martin closed his eyes, knowing now—in his flesh and bones—what he had only known intellectually. She saw herself inside. She saw nothing real to us.
"It said Martin is a bad leader." She raised her head. "He doesn't know what he's doing. He's going to lead us to our death. He doesn't understand."
"How could anybody else know how good Martin is?" William asked.
"Stop it, Rosa," Ariel said.
"It isn't true," said Alexis Baikal. "That isn't what I saw."
"Quiet," William said, gaze fixed on Rosa. "Rosa, everybody saw something different. That means they saw what they wanted to see."
Rosa shook her head stubbornly.
"I think we are having a bit of panic," William said. "Only to be expected. We're young, and this is all very strange and difficult."
"Be quiet," Rosa said, tilting her head back, a large, naked Valkyrie in an opera. She appeared so vulnerable, and yet Martin could feel her threat to the Job as palpably as if she were a wasp stinging his flesh. No time to waste.
He said nothing, watching William.
William nodded to Ariel. "She's your friend, Ariel," he said. "She needs your help."
"She's a victim," Ariel said.
"Stop it," Rosa said.
"It's panic," William pursued. "You're feeling our panic, our anxiety. You're very perceptive. You see what we feel, Rosa."
"Come with me, Rosa," Ariel said.
"I will not fight," Rosa said. "None of you should fight. The Pan is wrong. He's—"
"Enough, please," Ariel said, voice thick with emotion.
Martin saw Theresa crying, and Alexis Baikal; but only when William turned back to look at him, and Martin saw his face was damp, did his chest hitch and his own eyes fill. He stepped forward.