and I first kissed and where he also won me a teddy bear, which

we dressed up and left with a Take me home sign on it.

“Oh, you know you loved yours.” He smiles at me and then

loops his arm through mine and we skip after Luke up the pathway

to the front door of his house.

Luke shoves the door open and steps to the side to hold it

for Seth and me. We turn sideways so we can fit through the

doorway without letting go of each other and Luke follows us in

and shuts the door.

I get the feeling that something’s wrong the moment I step

inside. There are heavy striped curtains blocking the windows so

it’s very dark and musty. The orange-and-brown-plaid couches are

covered in plastic and there’s a plastic rug sprawled over most of

the shaggy brown carpet. There are shelves built into the walls and

each one is lined with rows of animal figurines that are

coordinated by breed. Plants decorate the windowsills and are

lined up from smallest to largest, but they’re all brown and dying.

It’s cold too and I can see my breath puffing out in front of my

face and it mixes with the dust.

“What’s with all the plastic?” Seth asks as Luke makes his way

to a hallway at the back corner of the room.

Luke shrugs as he flicks the thermostat with his fingers. “My

mom’s insane.”

We don’t utter another word. We leave the living room and

head down the hall. I notice how bare the walls are, no photos, no

pictures, no decorations, and it gets colder the farther back into

the house we go. I’m getting kind of nervous, especially because

the air is really dusty and it’s making it hard to breathe. When we

reach the end of the hall, however, Luke opens a door and I step

into the room and the air clears.

“So this is my room,” Luke tells me awkwardly and then

cracks a joke. “You two are the only two people besides Kayden

who have dared step foot into the shithole.”

I turn in a circle as I take in the made bed, the band posters

tacked to the walls, and the desk with a computer on it that looks

like it’s from the nineties. Everything is very clean and very orderly, but not in an uneasy way like out in the living room. “It’s not a

shithole,” I assure him. “It’s your room.”

He seems happy with my response and his rigid shoulders

relax a little. “Well, I’m glad you think so because I sure as hell

don’t.” He pats the front pocket of his jacket and takes his pack of

cigarettes out. “Oh, and by the way, it’s fucking hilarious when you

swear.” He doesn’t light up a cigarette; he just holds the pack in his hand like it’s his security blanket.

Seth sits on the bed and bounces up and down a little and

the mattress squeaks. “So what’s your brilliant plan?” he asks,

crossing his leg over his knee.

Still holding his cigarettes, Luke rolls up his sleeves and

scoots out a chair that’s in front of the computer. He presses the

power button on the tower and then sits down in the chair, waiting

for the computer to boot up. He holds up his finger and reaches

for an iPod beside the computer. He hums under his breath as he

scrolls through songs and I give Seth a questioning look.

Seth raises his eyebrows and twists his head toward Luke.

“So, are you going to tell us, or are we going to have to guess?”

“You’re going to have to guess.” Luke sets the iPod down

and a song clicks on, “Running Away,” by Hoobastank.

“Are we guessing by this song?” Seth’s face lights up with

enthusiasm as he straightens up his posture.

Luke nods as he opens a search engine and types a few keys

on the keyboard. “Yep.”

Seth taps his finger on his chin, enjoying the game. “Are we

running away?”

Luke pops a cigarette into his mouth and then claps his

hand. “Bravo. Nicely done.”

I shoot Seth a confused look and he just shrugs. “What? I

love games.”

I sigh. “Am I the only one who seems to mind that we’re

talking about running away?”

They both shrug and I roam around the room looking at all

Luke’s posters and little knickknacks scattered about. Seth takes

out his phone and starts texting while Luke types on the keyboard

and clicks the mouse. There are photos all over his room, some of

him with a woman who looks a lot like him, and I think it’s his

mother. There’s also another woman he’s in a few pictures with

who’s a lot older than Luke, and she has the same brown eyes as

him. Maybe it’s his aunt or his sister, but I thought she was much

younger. There are a few of pictures of him with random girls and

a handful where he’s with Kayden. They’re standing next to a black

motorcycle and smiling and they look happy. The bike has a huge

dent in it and Kayden’s arm is scraped and bleeding.

“He wrecked it,” Luke clarifies. When I turn around, I find that

he’s watching me from the computer desk as he leans back in the

chair. “He was trying to jump it over a hill and he wrecked it.”

“I think I remember.” I glance at the photo again. “That was

the year he couldn’t play for a few weeks because he’d hurt his

arm, right?”

“Yeah, that was the one. And we lost three games in a row

because of it.”

“My dad was so mad.” I turn around to face him. “He used to

chew him out during dinner.”

“Oh, I bet.” Luke’s mouth turns upward and I realize he

doesn’t smile very much. “He used to chew us out all the time at

practice.”

Thinking of Kayden hurts my heart. “Maybe we should go

see him,” I suggest.

“I was planning on it.” Luke clicks the mouse on the PRINT

PAGE button on the screen and the printer beside the tower

illuminates. “Right after I plan our running away.”

“Aren’t we a little too old to be running away?” Seth asks,

looking up from his phone. “Isn’t it more like a road trip, which is

something I suggested a few days ago?”

“It sounds more adventurous when you say running away,” I

admit. “Like we’re doing something scandalous.”

Seth’s shoulders jerk forward as he sputters a high-pitched

laugh. “Oh my God, I’ve been such a bad influence on you.”

My mouth droops into a frown. “What did I say?”

He stands up to shove his phone into his pocket.

“Scandalous. That’s something I would say.” He bounces back

down on the bed.

I shrug and shuffle my toe across the carpet in a half-circle in

front of me, feeling silly. “So? It’s a compliment being like you.”

All the humor evaporates from his face and his honey-brown