When I get back to our house at school, I go up to my room to call Gabe.  My fingers hover over his name but I can’t press the call button.  Then my phone starts vibrating in my hand showing Gabe’s picture and my heart drops.  I can’t do this to him.

“Hello.”  I say as though I don’t know it was him.

“Please tell me what I just heard is not true.”  His voice dripping with anger.

“Gabe, let me explain.” I say not sure what to tell him.

“No need Maddy.  If you want to chance yourself with him again I am not going to talk you out of it.”  His anger subsides.  I can’t believe he is saying this.  I didn’t think the conversation was going to go this way.

“Gabe…”

“But do not come to me when he breaks your heart.  Not if Maddy but when because he will.  You know where I stand with you and I refuse to do this anymore.”  He snaps.

“Let’s remember Gabe, you are the one who walked away from me.  You are the one who couldn’t break your promise to Trent.”

“I thought what we had was more but I guess I was wrong.  I actually believed you would pick me over him.  How ridiculous was I?  Have a great time with my brother for however long he lasts.”  He spat and then he hangs up on me again.  I can’t believe this man, he keeps hanging up on me.  Ugh.

I lay down on my bed.  I feel them coming those damn tears again.  I think I have cried more in the last year then my whole life.  It kills me the way Gabe talked to me but it hurt more the way he feels about me now.  I am nothing to him, some stupid girl following some guy who will break her heart.  I knock on my door finally brings me back.

“Come in” I say sitting up on my bed quickly wiping my tears.

“It has been a total of four hours, he has already broken your heart?”  Kenna comes in the room sitting on my bed.

“It’s not Trent, its Gabe.  He found out about me and Trent, I just got off the phone with him.”

“Did you honestly think he would be cool with this?”  She says it nice enough but I hear the condescending nature in her voice.

“No, I just wasn’t prepared for how I feel knowing he hates me.”

“Oh Maddy.  I don’t know what to say.”  She wraps her arms around me giving me a hug.

We both know there is nothing she can say that will make the situation better so I let her hold me and comfort me.

The two months go by fast.   Trent stuck to his word calling me every day and even coming up two of the weekends.  I still am not committed to making our relationship work yet but he is making great strides.  Gabe never called me again and I didn’t have the nerve to call him.  I miss talking to him but I know I can’t have both in my life.

Graduation is here and we are all getting ready in our cap and gowns when Trent walks into our house.   I had attended his graduation last weekend.  We are going back to Belcrest for two weeks and then I am moving to New York with Ian and Trent is going there too, to play for Soccer National League.  They signed him at the end of his season at Thrayer University.  Mackenna and Bryan are staying in Belcrest, Bryan has gotten a financing job across the border in Illinois but it would be close enough for them to stay in our hometown.  Why they want to stay there I have no idea.  What Kenna doesn’t know is Bryan is asking her to marry him tonight after our party.

“Let’s get going graduates.  Party time is over.”  Trent walks in looking so hot in his blue suit.  It looked like it was tailored to fit his lean body perfectly showing off his v-shape torso.  His hair is gelled back making it look wavy.

“Party time is tonight.”  Colt yells over to him fixing his cap.

Trent walks over to me, grabbing my gown from my hands.  “Let me.”  He holds it open while I put my arms in it covering up my navy and white dress.  “You look beautiful…as always.”  He kisses my cheek.

Graduation goes off without a hitch.  We have a party to celebrate with our friends.  Trent spends the night…in my bed.  Nothing happens but it feels good waking up in his arms.

I don’t know if it is the alcohol or nerves from waking up with Trent but I have to rush to the bathroom.  I throw up so much I don’t have anything left in me.  My body is sweating and cold.  This is the worst hangover I have ever experienced.

Two days later at the Basso’s I still don’t feel any better.  I can’t eat anything and I am throwing up every morning.  I lay in bed most of the day moving only to the couch.  Trent is worried getting me tea and crackers.  I think we both know but are refusing to admit it.  We would rather ignore it than find out.  Ignorance is bliss for us but after day three I know we have to do it.  I tell Trent we need to go buy a test and all he does is nod in agreement.

Luckily his parents are out of the house doing errands in town so we sneak up to the bathroom and I pee on the stick.  We sit on the edge of his bed setting the timer on my phone.  I have three minutes to live in ignorance before my life changes.  I give it to Trent, he holds my hand while we wait in silence.  He hasn’t run yet of course we don’t know for sure anyway.

My alarm rings out from my phone and I slowly walk over to the stick on his nightstand.  “No, we aren’t doing it here.”  He grabs my hand pulling the stick off the counter and taking me out of the house.  We walk hand and hand to the old barn.  I hadn’t been here in years.  We climb the ladder up to the second floor.

“Alright, are you comfortable Maddy?”  He asks.

“Yes, are you ready?”  I ask him back.

He pulls the stick out of his hand and I close my eyes for a second before I look down.

“Two lines mean?”  Trent asks.

“I’m pregnant.”  I sigh.

Chapter 20 – Present Day

I have had enough heart to hearts today.  I don’t need a lecture from this woman who went from my mother to my enemy in a matter of months.

“Are you out for a run?”  Her eyes examining me up and down.

“I was but I ran into Jack, we just left Fifties Diner.”  I say trying to pull down my shirt and shorts as she appraises me.

“Walk with me will you?”  She motions the way I just came from.

“Um...”  I stutter trying to think of an excuse.

“Please Madeline.  We need to talk.”  Her voice becomes a little softer towards me.

“Ok.”  I turn around joining her.  She cut off her long blond hair into a shorter cut but it fits her, bringing out the blue eyes she shares with her boys.  Wearing a pair of Capri workout pants and t-shirt I assume she just came from the gym.  She has always been into her health and fitness.

“How is New York?”  She asks.  Seriously, she is going to have a casual conversation with me.

“It’s ok.”  I shrug.

“Have you found a decorating job yet?”  She looks over at me taking a drink of her water bottle.

“Not a permanent one yet, No.”  I confirm keeping my eyes forward.

“That’s a shame.”  She sounds genuine but I have no idea why I am here having this conversation with her.

“Well, it’s a hard business to get into, I knew it when I decided on it as a major.”  I shrug my shoulders.

“You’re talented, you will find something.  Maybe you should consider something outside of New York.”  She compliments me and I can’t help but glance over to her in surprise.  “Don’t look so surprised Maddy, I have always believed in you.”  She smiles a truly authentic grin to me.

“I guess we will see what the future holds.”

“Speaking of the future.  What exactly are your plans?” her voice is back to the cold indifferent one.

“Not sure what you mean?”  I say even though I know exactly what she is asking but I want to hear her ask it.

“Regarding my two sons, I want to know how you think you will rectify this situation.”  There is that cold as ice voice she has used in regards to me lately.

“I don’t really know.”  I softly say.

“Which one do you love?”  She asks as though it is as simple as that.